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20 is not that old have you old people seen a 20 year old kid these days? They are not that mature! 20 year old guys are as mature as the 16 year old she is! With that being said, they are not ready to have sex because she is too fearful. When you are mature enough you will not ask questions like this. You will ask your partner, and tell him you are nervous yourself. Im 22 and still get selfconscious but in a different way, for different reasons!
The jig's up--at least for me. I am not sure I am hearing from a 16 year old, folks, let alone a female. Too far off the map, it seems to me? It all reads more like an immature selfish 20 yr old looking for the right arguments to lay on some unsuspecting 16 yr old who enjoys head games...
Does he know its your first time? :cool:
Just this sentence says enough!Quote:
Originally Posted by justagurl:)
You are not ready, you think are, but you are not!
A baby is a human being, who needs love and cheerish and you will need lots of patience.
Don't just sleep with this guy because you are scared he won't you no more if u don't have sex with him.
If you want and feel ready to have sex you NEED to know the consequences of sex!
She knows full well what she is getting into. She is just being a smarta** kid and jerking our chains. She thinks this gives her power, but it proves she is as dumb as a box of rocks.
That's not the issue. There are mature 20 year old guys and plenty of immature ones. However, the law doesn't take maturity into account. For statutory rape charges, chronological age is all that counts (except in the case of severe mental defect).Quote:
Originally Posted by blondieinCAN
Seeing as I am only a year older than you, and I am not going to step in and tell you what to do, I am not your parent and frankly, whether you throw your life down the drain or not will most likely not keep me up at night. I will tell you that, as a guy and someone who use to hang out with 20 year olds for work related purposes, this guy doesn't love you. Let's be honest with ourselves here. Why would he love you? Because you have things in common? NO. Because you have interesting conversatons? NO. Because you know each other on a "personal level"? NO. THERE IS NO REASON FOR HIM TO BE EVEN TALKING TO YOU. THE ONLY THING HE WANTS HIS SEX. It's simple, he will dump you once he has sex, and you will be left all alone wondering why. Once he get's what he came for why would he stick around? He doesn't want a relationship, he doesn't need some high school girl tying him down! He wants to party and have fun, not be in a relationship and if you are to blind to see that, especially after all the advice given to you, than the troubles and heartbreaks that will be forthcoming are rightfully deserved.
First times almost never run smoothly! It will hurt like a mutha!! My first time was with my current boyfriend who was also a virgin, we had been together for 4 months and we were both ready, the first time we tried it hurt so much he couldn't even get inside me.. The second time he did but it hurt A lot! I was just lying there thinking please come! We have been together 8 months now and sex is good.. Good luck with it but don't fret if its not perfect, I don't know anyone who's first time went well, one of my friends lost her virginity in the back of her car at a party to a guy who's name she didn't even know.. Make sure your doing it for the right reasons.
Hey hun well I was a freshmen when I lost mine and I'm now a junior.. I wasn't in the right state of mind if you know what I'm saying.. lol.. but what I think you should be thinking about is if you really like this guy enough to lose it to him and findout if he's one of thoseguys that will just have sexwith you and leave you don't want that believe me.. it happened to meits not too cool.. but if you do decide to have sex with him and your worried you won't be good.. well I'm assuming he know that its your first time so he should understand.. and if not w.e so beit.. well goodluck with everything.. ENJOY.. lol.. comment backQuote:
Originally Posted by justagurl:)
I am 20 and I was in you shoes and the guy was older than me I decided to finally take that step up and I got pregnant and had a misscarage 3 months later. 16 is a hard age for all of your hormones I thought I was ready and of course because ha was expierienced he was used to being with people that were also and sex is not the greatest feeling until like the third time you have done it I am now older and I found a great guy and I am living on my own and pregnant and the expierience is so much better I wish I would have waited until I was truly ready and had the right person
Well, I appreciate all the advice here. Whether some being advice and some being just plain insults. I think a lot of you guys think I haven't been put in this situation before. Wrong.. I have been given the opportunity to have sex many times, but Ive turned them down. I knew I wasn't ready. I love him and he loves me, and its going to be special. Ive always dated older guys, always will... We've decided to wait a little longer, because he wants to make sure I'm ready. Im OK with that, we have been together for quite some time now, 1 yr and a half... We are happy, and he knows my values. He wants to respect them, so just in case we are totally going to wait. He's incredible to me. I really do appreciate all the advice that was given here.. I'll update soon and tell you how it goes...
Justagurl:)
Thanks for responding back and please do keep us updated.
First, I don't recall anyone insulting you except for one person (who posted after this not and those posts have been removed).Quote:
Originally Posted by justagurl:)
I think you have underestimated most of us. I, for one, didn't think this was the first time you had the opportunity (as soon as a girl starts budding they will have opportunities). The thing that bothered me most was your statement in the OP that you wanted him "real bad". That made it appear that you were using sex to get him. Subsequent posts, especially the last one, give us more of an impression that you are in a committed relationship. It sounds like the guy is pretty special. But I would make sure you wait until you are legal.
you just have to be ready for the consequences and be sure he's worth it!=)
Well just to tell you if u were really ready you wouldn't have these questions, but since your most likely going to do it anyway make sure your partner knows you've never had sex and that you don't exactly know what to do but when it happens things will probably happen you won't really be thinking about how or if your doing it right... He'll probably take the lead through the whole thing anyway... so all you have to worry about is safety first, as in birth control and comdomsQuote:
Originally Posted by justagurl:)
All this guy wants is relations not a relationship. All he is going to get is sex and he is going to leave with his jerky self. And all your going to end up is with an emotional investment. After that you'll want a relationship and he'll just turn his back and hurt you. So you should wait for someone you NO who is right and you really care about!! For sures!! I was like that. I thought I was ready and this guy just wanted sex. But wait. It will just be more drama.Quote:
Originally Posted by justagurl:)
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