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-   -   Opinion on current situation is needed. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=404786)

  • Oct 15, 2009, 09:21 PM
    Alty

    As far as I know abortions are not covered under Alberta health care because it is a side option, not part of basic health care.

    I'm not sure of the cost, that's something you'll have to find out by calling clinics or utilizing the internet.

    As for being charged. Yes, you can be charged. The legal age of consent is 16, your girlfriend isn't legal, you are, so you are going to be considered a sex offender.

    Will you be charged? That depends on her parents, the clinic and her.

    Some lessons are learned the hard way. I have to ask, if you don't want children right now, which is a good choice, why weren't you using birth control?
  • Oct 16, 2009, 07:08 AM
    CGM91
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post
    As far as I know abortions are not covered under Alberta health care because it is a side option, not part of basic health care.

    I'm not sure of the cost, that's something you'll have to find out by calling clinics or utilizing the internet.

    As for being charged. Yes, you can be charged. The legal age of consent is 16, your girlfriend isn't legal, you are, so you are going to be considered a sex offender.

    Will you be charged? That depends on her parents, the clinic and her.

    Some lessons are learned the hard way. I have to ask, if you don't want children right now, which is a good choice, why weren't you using birth control?

    For the obvious reason that she didn't want her parents to know that she was sexually active.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 07:19 AM
    CGM91

    If she was pregnant, at the abortion clinic.. I heard many females lie about their age. What would be penalty in doing so?

    I know most abortion clinics just want money and tend to over ride legal issues.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 11:15 AM
    justcurious55

    Have you figure out yet is she is pregnant or not? You need to figure that out first. Has she taken a test yet? If she's a week late, she should be able to test now. She should use her first morning urine to do so.
    And no, lying about her age sounds like a bad idea.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 11:15 AM
    justcurious55

    Have you figure out yet is she is pregnant or not? You need to figure that out first. Has she taken a test yet? If she's a week late, she should be able to test now. She should use her first morning urine to do so.
    And no, lying about her age sounds like a bad idea.


    Edit: sorry for the double post, I don't know what my computer/internet is doing today! I thought there was a delete button?
  • Oct 16, 2009, 01:02 PM
    Survivor07

    Yeah, I agree that lying about her age is a very bad idea. This is why teens having sex is a bad idea. They're not equipped to deal with the physical, emotional and financial consequences.

    First, find out if she's pregnant. If she is and abortion is what SHE wants, then it is in her best interest to confide in a trusted adult. I would be devastated if I found out my daughter had an abortion at 15 and went through it without me. Most parents don't expect perfection from their teens. I understand she doesn't want them to know but if they're loving parents, I'm sure they would get over their initial disappointment and help HER.

    Just a thought: She could have complications from an abortion and need emergency care at a hospital.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 02:09 PM
    justcurious55

    Had to spread the rep survivor. But I completely agree again. If it turns out she is pregnant, the option of having an abortion is more than just about what he wants. And there's a reason there are laws in place about the age of consent. It's so that hopefully, less children are put in this situation.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 04:31 PM
    CGM91

    I will get a pregnancy test tomorrow.

    I read a few places on the internet that in Canada, Abortions are covered in the health plan and can be kept private as long as the woman/girl is above the age of 12.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 04:52 PM
    Alty

    Here is some info on abortions in Canada.

    AbortionInCanada.ca .:.

    It seems that abortions done in hospitals are covered under health care but abortions in private clinics aren't.

    As for age of consent for an abortion, I couldn't find any info on that. It would make sense though that the age for consent for abortion would be the same as age of consent for sex. In other words, you girlfriend would need parental permission.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 05:23 PM
    CGM91
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Altenweg View Post
    Here is some info on abortions in Canada.

    AbortionInCanada.ca .:.

    It seems that abortions done in hospitals are covered under health care but abortions in private clinics aren't.

    As for age of consent for an abortion, I couldn't find any info on that. It would make sense though that the age for consent for abortion would be the same as age of consent for sex. In other words, you girlfriend would need parental permission.

    Thanks for the link,

    I don't think the bolded part is true. Anyone is allowed to have an abortion, it is their decision and their baby. Not their parents.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 05:27 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by CGM91 View Post
    Thanks for the link,

    I don't think the bolded part is true. Anyone is allowed to have an abortion, it is their decision and their baby. Not their parents.

    That's true, but age is a consideration.

    Think about it, if she's not legal to have sex then being pregnant would cause problems, because she obviously has had sex.

    She may be able to get an abortion without parental consent, but the clinic would have
    To report her age to authorities.

    I'm not trying to scare you, I'm only being honest. It's best that you talk things out with her. Obviously a publicly funded clinic is your best bet, because health care would cover the cost, but I have to assume that publicly funded facilities will be even more concerned with her age and the fact that she's not of legal consent.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 05:34 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by CGM91 View Post
    Anyone is allowed to have an abortion, it is their decision and their baby. Not their parents.

    Not so. An abortion is an invasive medical procedure that carries with it many risks. Your girlfriend is not old enough to completely comprehend the possible risks involved with an abortion or any other medically invasive procedure, therefore, her parents must give consent as they are her legal ADULT guardians.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 05:41 PM
    CGM91
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    Not so. An abortion is an invasive medical procedure that carries with it many risks. Your gf is not old enough to completely comprehend the possible risks involved with an abortion or any other medically invasive procedure, therefore, her parents must give consent as they are her legal ADULT guardians.

    Do you know this for a fact? I know that abortions are much safer then giving birth. There are many types of abortions, If she is pregnant I think she would be most comfortable with either pill ingestion (where she has a normal period and bleeds out the fetus) or suction where they.. "vacuum" the fetus out of the womb.

    I found this site;

    The Morgentaler Clinic

    If she is pregnant, I am going to email them and ask them questions. It says if I am an Ontario Citizen then Health Care Pays for it. However, if I am not an Ontario Resident then the price will be around 500-600 dollars.

    I want to make sure she is as safe and comfortable as possible, and I also want to make sure that I don't get my butt sued.

    It's a lot of stress, it is very hard not to stress even when you are not sure of if she is pregnant or not.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 05:50 PM
    justcurious55

    Me and at least one other have asked you a few times now, is she really wanting an abortion if she is pregnant or is this still you wanting her o have an abortion? Why won't you answer? Even now, talking about specific types of abortions its still "i think she..." not actually what she thinks or feels, still all about your thoughts.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 05:53 PM
    Wondergirl

    Are you already pressuring her to get an abortion? How does she feel about it? (Many girls her age want a baby "to love.") And how will she feel about an abortion (and you) afterwards -- and in years to come? This isn't just an inconvenient little piece of tissue inside her, if she's truly pregnant.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 05:56 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by CGM91 View Post
    Do you know this for a fact? I know that abortions are much safer then giving birth.

    I am a registered nurse working in the women's health field... specifically labor and delivery. Yes, I know this for a fact. A person must be 18 to enter into a legal contract... this includes medical consent forms.

    Now, you are putting the cart before the horse. You don't even know if she IS pregnant yet. You are just freaking out because she is late and you know this is common for her.

    Also, you don't even know that she would want an abortion. You are just preparing for what you want.

    Simply put, young man, if you aren't ready for the consequences of adulthood, then don't play the game. Three P's come to mind here... Keep your penis in your pants until you are ready to be a paren't.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 06:00 PM
    Alty

    Quote:

    I want to make sure she is as safe and comfortable as possible, and I also want to make sure that I don't get my butt sued.
    Sued?

    Sweetie, you'd be listed as a sexual predator. You'd be charged with statutory rape. This isn't a matter of paying some money and sweeping it under the rug. This is a criminal charge.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 06:02 PM
    CGM91
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by justcurious55 View Post
    me and at least one other have asked you a few times now, is she really wanting an abortion if she is pregnant or is this still you wanting her o have an abortion? why won't you answer? even now, talking about specific types of abortions its still "i think she..." not actually what she thinks or feels, still all about your thoughts.

    I am not sure if she wants an abortion.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 06:05 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by CGM91 View Post
    I am not sure if she wants an abortion.

    If you aren't sure, then stop planning it. Be mature and wait until you find out if she is or isn't before you start making plans. Remember, you aren't the only one involved here. In the end, it is her decision, not yours.
  • Oct 16, 2009, 06:12 PM
    CGM91
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    If you aren't sure, then stop planning it. Be mature and wait until you find out if she is or isn't before you start making plans. Remember, you aren't the only one involved here. In the end, it is her decision, not yours.

    That is true, she is the one harvesting and creating the baby. However, neither of us are ready for parent hood. We both have a lot going for our self and having a child...

    I don't want to say it is a mistake, it is a surprise.

    Anyway, I am worrying and planning for the future. It is the only thing I can do right now.

    And yes I understand that I can be charged, do you know if I can be charged if my girlfriend and her parents do not want to lay charges? Can the government still charge me with statuary rape? (which I think is complete B.S).

    I appreciate all the answers and opinions.

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