If it must then it must, but if he still cares about you enough to try and stay friends then there's a good chance that it won't. Like I said, He doesn't WANT to hurt you. Don't give him an ultimatum, because chances are that neither of you will be happy if you do. You will either lose him entirely, or you could get him back and possibly be in an unhappy relationship because he resents being pressured. Just give it time, live your life, and let him come to you.

To prepare myself, if it happens... what if he wants me back?

If you are still committed to being with him, then be with him. You don't need me to tell you that part.

OK... yeah I guess... its just, he said himself before, he didn't deserve me because of all the times he had doubts and I stuck around and all... I just don't want to look like a... eh.. fallback?

He's having problems with himself, and there's really not much you can do about it except for listen. Don't say too much, and hope he figures himself out soon.

Look, you seem really goood at this advice and I have to ask, is distance really that hard for a guy to deal with? I mean, if he loved me like he said... shouldnt we overcome distance? I know it seems like I'm asking the same question over and over but I mean... its distressing for me.. I mean, my friend said he's weak and distance shouldn't matter and then I hear distance relationships don't work etc... god I don't want to be a girl who mourns and sits around wondering but the break up was so blunt...

At this very moment, my boyfriend is 3 hours away from me. We've been together almost 2 years. And just before this summer, he was away at college for nine months, coming back every few weeks. While he was away we talked nearly every day. We put in effort. And now we have SKYPE, talking on webcams. IHe's coming back today to visit me, and then next weekend I'm going to visit him. These things take effort but they can work.

But yes, it is difficult to deal with depending on the person. But in the ling run, it's never really easier, just hard, and harder.

... my ex is 3hours away tooo :( it could have worked.. I told him and he wouldn't listen to me:(:(

You're going around in circles in your mind and he's probably at peace knowing that it's up to him to decide what happens to this relationship. Have you ever seen the movie, "he's just not into you"? It's so true - you know when a man is in love with a woman he'll want to bring down the moon for her- not leave her wondering. In your case, he's made himself perfectly clear -verbally and in action. He's no longer interested - I'm sorry, but t's the reality. Make yourself less and less available.

I no.. I no I shouldn't want to be with someone who constantly hurts me... and I no more hurt is coming if I don't let go now. I mean he could, yet again, have the upper hand and turn around and say he has a girlf and cnt talk to me anymore... so, I should end this now. I think I've been hurt enough

I understand that you still want to be friends with him kind of. Believe me I get how you feel. But you will just hurt even more trying to be friends with him. Trust me. Sometimes loving someone means letting them go. It might take a while for you to move on, but it will take forever if you are still around him. Let him have what he wants. It hurts, but at least he's happy. If you love someone all you want is their happiness.

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Originally Posted by Ash17

i no..i no i shouldnt want to be with someone who constantly hurts me...and i no more hurt is coming if i dont let go now. I mean he could, yet again, have the upper hand and turn around n say he has a girlf and cnt talk to me nemore...so, i should end this now. I think ive been hurt enough

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Now you are talking.You have been hurt enough.You now need to stop allowing people hurt you.If someone loves you enough,they won't like to see you hurt.They would want to do anything in the world to see you happy.Whenever you miss this guy and feel sad about the whole thing,just keep reminding yourself these words.Some time down the line,when you look back,you will in fact wonder why you wasted even this amount of time in being in such a hurtful,demeaning relationship.That day isn't far,if only you break free and allow yourself to heal.Your life's about you,you and you alone.There'll be people along the way with whom you may share your life but God has given YOU the chance to live this life with happiness,love and peace.You have a right to be happy and enjoy this life.Whats stopping you?

Hey I just wanted to let you know... one day you WILL get over him. I was in the same position at one point and I thought it was impossible for me to move on... I really did. It took a while but eventually I moved on. And I look back and laugh at myself for holding on to someone who didn't want to hold on to me. Don't be sad cause its gone.. be happy cause it happened.

There's a lot of opinions here. And I am truly grateful. But I wish someone could give me the 100% right answer so I no I won't regret it. Because I feel he's my soulmate and we have a connection. I mean, I just need a 100% right answer on this.

Unfortunately, There's no way to really know for sure if there even is one, let alone what it is. I'm sure things will sort themselves out the way they're supposed to be. Just take a deep breath and focus on yourself for a while.

Screw this guy he obviously has issues :P

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Originally Posted by bubble113

screw this guy he obviously has issues :P

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Read the dates on posts. This is from August.