Ask Me Help Desk - Pregnant 14 year old

Quote:

Originally Posted by Synnen

Be her friend.

Don't judge her.

DO NOT IMPOSE YOUR MORALS ON HER IN ANY WAY.

Her body, her baby, her choice. If you really want to help her, listen when she talks about what she wants to do, and help her if you can (looking up clinics in phone books for exams, holding her hand when she goes to the doctor, etc). Refusing to judge her, and refusing to make her choice for her, and helping with the everyday stuff that can get so overwhelming is one of the best ways to be a friend that I can think of.

If you do suspect that she is on drugs, you need to report that to an adult that can help her. She might get mad at you, but you are doing it for her own good. It isn't tattling or ratting her out if she is harming herself.

I commend you on your maturity. It takes a lot of guts to try to help a friend when you feel lost on how to do it. I wish I had had a friend like you when I was pregnant as a teenager.

well her mom doesn't even care that she does drugs or drinks... her mom supplies her smokes for god sakes

Just because her mom doesn't care, doesn't mean that YOU shouldn't care.

If you're not comfortable reporting it to someone else, that's fine. You don't have to save her from herself.

I do, however, think it's great that you're trying your best to help her. I was just giving you suggestions on how.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Synnen

Just because her mom doesn't care, doesn't mean that YOU shouldn't care.

If you're not comfortable reporting it to someone else, that's fine. You don't have to save her from herself.

I do, however, think it's great that you're trying your best to help her. I was just giving you suggestions on how.

Well I'm really mad I just found out that she miscarraged because she would not stop smoking or doing drugs she was only 3 months pregnant but still she wasn't as upset as I thought but when she foun she was pregnant she was happy now she is happy she isn't pregnant but she said she wanted to be it is confusing but she just said it was smoking pot I don't really think it is... (her boyfriend isn't the best... he has a bad temper)

Wow... sounds like your friend is in a tough place.

I don't know what to suggest to you, other than possibly talking to an adult that could help, like a teacher or a student counselor. She isn't in a very good environment, and it sounds as though she doesn't know how to get out of it.

I hope she knows what a good friend she has in you!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Synnen

Wow...sounds like your friend is in a tough place.

I don't know what to suggest to you, other than possibly talking to an adult that could help, like a teacher or a student counselor. She isn't in a very good environment, and it sounds as though she doesn't know how to get out of it.
I hope she knows what a good friend she has in you!

Well according to her she loves her life and says she wouldn't have it any other way and like I said before rehab won't help(tried it) cousling won't help(tried that two) and she doesn't trust very many people with her life and the things in it her boyfriend is 18!:eek: