well that's how I was, ever since I was 13 I wanted nothing more than to find that one girl who would love me like that and do anything for me, I knew she was out there. So all through high school I never really enjoyed life cause I was looking for her.

I got to college and I still worried about it and then one day we were on a road trip to another school and on the way up there I convinced myself that I'm not going to look for her tonight, that I'm just going to look for some random makeout, which is the opposite of whaty I've ever done, I had never made out with anyone.

so somehow I convinced myself to stop looking, and there she was. She just fell into my lap.

if you quit looking it will find you

He had a point. I gave up once I graduated high school. I thought this guy that I was with since 10th was going to be the one but it didn't turn out that way.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by HotPotato2009

He had a point. I gave up once I graduated high school. I thought this guy that I was with since 10th was going to be the one but it didnt turn out that way.

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What happened? Did you guys both change?

Well he was the one that changed. After he got locked up (for like 2 years) he changed completely! He wasn't that nice sensitive funny guy that cared for me like he said he did. Then after a while he cheated on me.

I stayed the same person after all those years. That is why I gave up. Cause I felt like I wasted my time..

Quote:

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Originally Posted by HotPotato2009

Well he was the one that changed. After he got locked up (for like 2 years) he changed completely! He wasnt that nice sensitive funny guy that cared for me like he said he did. Then after a while he cheated on me.

I stayed the same person after all those years. That is why i gave up. Cause I felt like I wasted my time..

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Uhhh I think I would've run for it after he got locked up... you're saying he went to jail? For what? Haha

Yeah :p but at the time I thought he was "the one" so I waited for him. He got locked up for robbing people on the street. He and his friend did the robbing and they both got caught.

I know what you mean, I was so in love with my ex I possibly would've stayed by his side even then... Now I'm trying to get over him.

You will get over him. In time, but you will get over him and somebody really great that loves you very much will come to you :)

I'm just going to take that to heart and believe in it. And you're right, there will be someone out there who will truly love me.
Now my only problem is that I need to stop constantly going to my ex's profiles to see what he's been saying and what he's been up to O.O

The thing is, he has somewhat of a life. And I am starting not to. I really want to be able to be less attached to him so that our relationship can grow and I can stop having self doubt... I sometimes feel like my life is empty without him.

What's stopping you from having your own life and keeping the relationship?

Do you really need to break up to have your own life?

What you need to do is learn how to balance, as opposed to fighting your feelings for him.

Yeah... I just get scared to leave or do something alone because I constantly worry; it's like if I don't email/text him all the time then he'll lose interest...

This is an internal battle. You need to learn to overcome your confidence, self-esteem and insecurity issues. Even if it's not him, it's going to be another boyfriend that you will feel this way.

Maybe it's time to get professional help, have you considered seeing a counsellor or a therapist?

Yes... but then that would get my mom involved... but I like the way you phrased that, I am quite insecure and I do have confidence issues...

Why would your mom have to be involved? How old are you?

If you know you have these issues you should do something about them sooner rather than later.

Why would this involve your mother?
Are you still living with your parents?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/search...archid=6063365

You are 15/16 and have an older boyfriend who is an adult, so yes you can't just tell your mom (but should)

I think worrying about a guy who has a life while your so young, and growing yourself, is a conflict you should not be having.

You really should be doing what normal teens do, having a great time while your growing up!

I’ve been in a situation like yours recently, but what was a bit different, that he made no conact at all. And I have to be honest here, I became really miserable- very miserable [couldn’t control myself over anything etc.] but finally I am learning that I have to forget about him and I must love myself at this moment. If he was meant to be in my life, he would come.. if not, just like he came, others will come :)
Back to the subject:
Accept the way things are right now (whatever’s meant to be will find its way, don’t worry), and just say that maybe it is better this way. Have fun with your friends, try different things, and do not feel sad whenever you come to something which reminds you of him, just say “wow, what a great time I had!..im really lucky” and stop there. Take this as an experience from which you learned and you are going to become stronger because of it. Don’t regret anything – and don’t stress on wanting him to come back to you, (I’ve done it, and I got more miserable-I know how you feel, really) just think of this as a new beginning – single again; new person with experiences and ready to face what’s out there

Life goes on - that’s what I was promised. I’m sure you will find what your looking for.
Hope this helped a little..
Good luck;)