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Originally Posted by husky04

do you think there is any chance of her coming back? if so, do i take her back after what she did to me. im sure there is no chance of that happening anymore though.

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Honestly maybe but why would you want to go back with someone who lied to you about emotions played you for months and shows no remorse for leaving you for another guy? There are a million what if's but I'd call you an idiot if you went back with her. She clearly has played you. Movre on trust me there are a million better woman out there to give love to who will in return give it back to you and instead of using you. Stop wondering one day you won't want her back and for good reason.

All right, all I read was negative things about this person you want to your spend your life with, that's probably a red flag and not a good thing, I mean I understand your not here to tell us how great your relationship is but still, it came off to me being a very negative thing.

You ever have something you really wanted on lay away? Well that's what she's doing to you my friend, all right lets break up I'll hook up with these two guys while you wait in limbo for me to come back in a few months, I mean it could happen, okay love you cya in a few months.

Ummmm, screw that. You deserve better, the first one is always the hardest to get over, you'll be fine my friend let her go. Live for you.

Husky I know what you mean, she said the same thing to me and I'm going through the same thing, though its not 2 guys she told me she likes someone else after meeting them for 1 week, I gave this girl my soul, I know she loved me cause we had talked about marriage etc. I don't understand how you can leave someone you love for someone you like. Well I'm trying to move on, but I won't deny there's a part of me that hopes she comes back to me, and I would probably take her back. Love makes you blind, lol like they say "love" it's a mother fu cker

Are you in denial or what? She has told you straight out to leave her alone and get a life, and she is right.

After the shock wears off and you regroup, You'll see reality for what it is, your were just a stop on her journey to do her thing, and it didn't work. It happens, so move on, and stop worrying if she will come back, because she won't.

That is well said, and believe it or not I'm actually doing a pretty good job of just leaving her alone, I did my own things with a girl yesterday, I have been hanging out with my friends just making jokes about everything. She texted me yesterday just asking how everything is, I told her and the said I'm doing a good job of moving on and I got to go bye. I've realized she will never come back but I'm hoping she is mature enough to want to at least be friends soon. For right now though, I am perfectly fine the way it is.

Don't worry about being friends with her. You got to worry about yourself.

Your only 17... tons of time to go find other women!!

There are half a BILLION females to be friends with, pick as many as you like.

Just to update on everything, I have been doing All right with this. I still think about her quite a lot, and she went to the christmas dance last night and I saw pictures of her which look amazing, its tough because I could have went with her if I had just stayed with her. I did talk to her about things the other day.

She told me I pretty much blew it, I have no idea what I did, she said she just wasn't feeling it anymore and told me I should take her out on a date before she dumped me. She also said we did the same thing all the time and she thought I cared too much. Anyway she asked to go on a Saturday, and I already had plans with my buddies. The next day she dumped me and you know what happened from there. She told me if I had just taken her out on a date everything would be fine. We do still text, and I really want to stop, but its so hard and she is saying that her and her new boyfriend might not even work out. I still miss her, and I am doing a good job of getting over her, I just don't know if I should still be friends with her, or stop talking to her. My problem is right now if she suddenly wanted to come back to me, I think I would take her back. And I shouldn't.

Hey man, Im 17, a couple of months ago I split with my girlfriend, and it was absolute hell. BUt I dealt with it eventually, I still feel like I'm going nowhere but I know for a fact il get somewhere if you know what I mean.
Yesterday though I had just gone up town on the piss and walked home on my own, walked back towards her house because it is my only route, saw her and some other guy kissing. That was heartbreaking dude but I realised that I'm going to be happy again, I just can't get that image out of my head, but oh well life goes on and there will be better things to come :D
Your better off without someone like that in your life, and I think at 17 you should be out on the piss enjoying yourself, not having trust issues (because lets be honest 99% of teenagers are fairly insecure) go out, live your life and have no regrets :)
You will get through this.

The only thing I'm worried about is if I should stop talking to her now. We did make up and we said we should just be friends and now we text every once in a while. I just don't know if I should be doing that or not.

No, you should not be doing that. Do not remain friends with her. If you have any desire to live your own life and to get over her, you need to cut contact. Worry about getting yourself together. You will know if you are healed once the questions of "Do you think she will ever come back?" are no longer there. Until that point, no reason to remain friends with someone that you have a strong desire to be with. Not fair and it is emotionally draining.

Updating again.. I have had no contact for a week now, she texts me every once and a while and says what's up or whatever. I text back and say I'm busy or I can't talk.. should I not even reply or what. No contact is so difficult but I know it will help me get over her. I just need to know when I should start speaking to her again.

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Originally Posted by husky04

should i not even reply back or what.i just need to know when i should start speaking to her again.

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Easy answers? Don't respond at all. Never.

So your telling me I shouldn't talk to her ever again? That's tough because all of my friends and her friends hang out with the same people so its hard to just not talk to her if were with each other.

Saying hi, and being brief, is not breaking NC. Just stay away from long, drawn out explanations about your relationship, or break up, or her side of missing you so much... blah, blah, as that's what stirs those feelings back up, and when the confusion sets in.

Hey she ain't begging to get back, so what's the point of those old dumb, confusing, conversations about how you feel, or she feels?

To answer your question, when you have dealt with your feelings, and can see things in a very realistic light, and not be confused, or wonder what this means, and that means, then your ready to talk to her.

Until then, and don't be fooled by feeling good, leave her basically... ALONE!!

The last thing you need is false hope and confusion right now.

After a week of no contact, I hung out with her last night, I really didn't want to and had no idea I was going to. All my friends were with her friends and I had no idea. I went over to my friends car to get picked up and there she was. She told me to come in and sat on my lap, which was very weird. We had fun and stuff, but it was just weird. She now wants to be friends and is texting me and talking to me now. I don't know if I should be friends with her yet. She is still with another guy and I am doing a pretty good of moving on. Please let me know if I should still be talking to her now. And what to say when she tells me I'm being rude by just saying one word answers when I talk to her. I don't know if I can be friends or talk to her yet, but a part of me wants her to chase me. Please help!

She thinks your OK with everything... when your not. You really should go back to NC for your own good!! That would be the best thing to do In my opinion.

OR

If she says your being rude, you need to tell her she has NO ROOM TO TALK. You need make a point to her about how you feel and how she hurt you and how naïve she is to think that you could be friends with her when she just dumped you for other guys.

She really has no reason to attack you for being rude when she F-ed everything up! You need to tell her that. She may leave you alone then.

Sometimes people need to hear the truth!

Also I forgot to mention she did not sit on my lap because she wanted to, there was 5 people in the car I was in already so she had to.

Just go back to NC as you're not healed enough to mentally deal with seeing her.

I honestly feel like I could talk to her now, the only thing I am worried about is hearing things I don't want to hear. I am just so confused right now with everything. I feel like everything could be fine and we could be friends, I just don't know if I want that.