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Originally Posted by o NitSuA o

there is no way that she can take care of a baby at age 15, .

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While its very difficult and there is a good chance that the child will have problems in the future, not to mention the life change for the mother, it IS possible to make a go of it.

The problem is not in expressing your opinion, it's the way you expressed it. Instead of expressing your opinion you make statements that are inaccurate and judgemental.

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

Did you read her post? She says that she is against abortion. You are telling her to get an abortion. That's why you are not being helpful.

My point is that she does have other options, do I have to go through the list yet again?

You have a right to your opinion, but all you did was say "Get an abortion", not, in my opinion your best option is abortion. You didn't give any other option either, just abortion. She's against that option.

Are you understanding what I'm saying now?

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of course I read her post and definitely read the portion about being against an abortion. My opinion is that once she tells her parents, she should have one no matter what. I am usually pro life, but not in this instance.

there are two things on the list of options, get an abortion or have the child. From there she can give it away for adoption or take care of the child... so maybe three options.

I gave her my opinion to get an abortion and I did give reason as to why she should do it as well. Being the severe immaturity on her part. I personally think that she has no idea what is best for herself atm... so if I were her parents I would force her to get one.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

While its very difficult and there is a good chance that the child will have problems in the future, not to mention the life change for the mother, it IS possible to make a go of it.

The problem is not in expressing your opinion, its the way you expressed it. Instead of expressing your opinion you make statements that are inaccurate and judgemental.

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yes it IS possible to raise a child at that age, but with her current state it would be a miracle. Am I the only one seeing this girl getting into drugs within the next 3 years tops?? my opinions may be judgmental, but I believe I am telling the honest truth. At age 15, she went to a party, got drunk, and had unprotected sex with basically a random guy. Do you honestly think that this girl could take care of a child? I was telling her to get an abortion so that she doesn't destroy her life, the life of another child, and possibly her parents as well.

And once again that's the problem. You are telling her to get an abortion, not advising her. You are giving your opinion as if it were fact, it isn't. She does have other options which she needs to explore.

You said if you were her parents you'd force her to get one. Anyone who forces someone to go through something as traumatic and life changing as an abortion should be put away (that's my opinion). Ultimately it's her body and her decision, not yours, not even her parents (although they do have allot of sway).

I'm done arguing, this isn't doing the OP any good. Just be careful of the advice that you give, especially when it's so one sided. Be willing to have an open mind.

Abbii, tell your mom, decide what's best for you and for your baby. I wish you the best of luck. Take care.

Well well well. You sound like me. I'm 18 and my son just turned 3.He is my world. My everything and I was only 15 when I had him too. You have to tell your mom asap!! If you don't you will regret not telling her.

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She can take care of a baby at 15 i did it!! i have a 3 year old son who ismy world!! I still go to school and i work and i support my son!! If i can do it comeing from nothing she can too!!

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

And once again that's the problem. You are telling her to get an abortion, not advising her. You are giving your opinion as if it were fact, it isn't. She does have other options which she needs to explore.

You said if you were her parents you'd force her to get one. Anyone who forces someone to go through something as traumatic and life changing as an abortion should be put away (that's my opinion). Ultimately it's her body and her decision, not yours, not even her parents (although they do have allot of sway).

I'm done arguing, this isn't doing the OP any good. Just be careful of the advice that you give, especially when it's so one sided. Be willing to have an open mind.

Abbii, tell your mom, decide what's best for you and for your baby. I wish you the best of luck. Take care.

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OK then I ADVISE her to get an abortion. Happy? If I were her parents I would force her to get one because she is going to ruin the child's life and possibly hers.

To the girl above me. My hat is off to you, I'm sure it must have a very difficult experience.

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Originally Posted by o NitSuA o

ok then i ADVISE her to get an abortion. happy? if i were her parents i would force her to get one because she is going to ruin the childs life and possibly hers.

to the girl above me. my hat is off to you, im sure it must have a very difficult experience.

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ONitsua, are you against adoption?

The parents can't force the daughter to do anything

Alty,

I wish everyone had the same view as you did. It is truly the right way to be.

There is no use arguing with someone who hasn't even had half the life experience that you had and doesn't realize the consequences of abortion.

Thank BB, I just feel really bad for the OP, having to listen to such a narrow point of view. I don't disagree with abortion, I think it's a women's right to choose, but there are other choices available.

I know that I myself could never abort a baby, that's my choice, and the OP has made it very clear that she does not agree with abortion, yet all Nitsua keeps saying is get an abortion, get an abortion. Not helpful, actually hurtful, and he won't listen to reason.

Like I said, I'm done. Nitsua, when it's your decision to make, then so be it, but in this case it isn't you decision. I'm done arguiing with you, it's not getting us or the OP anywhere. If you want to discuss this further than start a thread about the benefits of abortion, I will no longer discuss it on this thread.

Okay I'll list the benefits of abortion:

Hmmm I can't seem to think of any.

Unless going through with the pregnancy is going to SERIOUSLY harm the mother or baby, then yes, abortion is necessary.

Just because a woman gets pregnant at such an early age for stupid choices doesn't mean that the unborn child should suffer.

I agree, but I still think it is her choice. I would prefer adoption, but that is also her choice.

Raising a child at 15 is hard, especially without the support of the father, which is the case here. It's a little late for the talk, but I don't think she should have to pay for this mistake for the rest of her life. Whatever she chooses, it's her choice, no one else's, not even her parents.

Like I said before, I would personally never get an abortion, but I do believe in pro-choice. The only time I really have a problem with abortion is when people use it as a form of birth control, that is not acceptable (in my opinion). I hope the OP figures this all out.

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Originally Posted by Altenweg

ONitsua, are you against adoption?

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No I am not.

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Originally Posted by o NitSuA o

ok then i ADVISE her to get an abortion. happy? if i were her parents i would force her to get one because she is going to ruin the childs life and possibly hers.

to the girl above me. my hat is off to you, im sure it must have a very difficult experience.

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If you were her parents you would be breaking the law if you tried to force her to have an abortion.

We pride ourselves on the quality of the advice we give here and your advice has not been high quality.

My mother became pregnant with me at 15, had me at 16.

It wasn't easy. It wasn't the best plan she could have had. It changed her life. Didn't "ruin it". I wouldn't recommend it to anyone as a lifeplan.

But it can be done. I'm proof.

Wow sweetie... this is a big problem. You need to tell your mom because she will be upset but she will help you. You need help. Your mom is the best person to help you. As for this guy you slept with... find him and tell him. He is the father and the father needs to know even though he might not be with you. You are 15 and you shouldn't have gotten pregnant because a baby chances everything. Good luck.

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Originally Posted by abbii_x

I just found out im 1 and half months pregnant

im 15! i always wanted kids and i dont agree with abortion!

im not with the guy i slept with it was at a party and we both had a bit too much too drink and hes one of those guys that every girls wants too be with and he just use girls!

i didn't care at the time because i didn't have any feelings for m but now theres more and i don't know how too tell him!

and i can't even think about tellin my mum!


please help

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hi hun I'm in the same position I'm 2 months pregnant, not with the father , I went to the family planning clinic and they gave me some very good advise u should try it x good luck x

You probably should get an abortion.
Being a teen mom isn't good.
You won't be having much of a life after this.
Go to planned parenthood and make an appointment to get an abortion.
And no they won't tell your mom, confidetiality.

Um, just a thought but has anyone noticed that the girl who asked the question hasn't responded since she asked it? If you look back over these 4 pages of responses, about 3 of the four are bickering. Just thought I would point that out.

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Originally Posted by ScottGem

If you were her parents you would be breaking the law if you tried to force her to have an abortion.

We pride ourselves on the quality of the advice we give here and your advice has not been high quality.

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I totally agree! I would rather have high quality advice rather than a down right order.