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-   -   The guy I like doesn't know I exist. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=69133)

  • Mar 5, 2007, 07:34 PM
    punkarella
    The guy I like doesn't know I exist.
    There is this guy I like. I have only seen him around campus a few times. I asked people if they knew him and if so what info they can give me. So far I know his name and that he's a 19 year old freshman and he lives in my dorm building!

    I have never had a boyfriend before. I always end up falling into the friend zone and the guys that wanted to date me I turn them down not because I wasn't attracted to them but for the fact that I'm still a bit insecure and IM 20!

    My friends tell me to go and talk to this guy but Its not that easy, I don't know what to say!

    The fact that I waited till I got to college to consider dating has really put me behind most girls. People don't even believe I'm still a virgin lol. I feel like I'm more "talk" then "action" which is true because when I get myself in an intimate situation with a guy my mind is all for it but my body pushes them away lol if that makes sense.

    Anyway, I just want to know how I can get this guy to not only just notice me but to get him to like me as well. I would like to be more then friends with this guy WITHOUT falling into the "friend zone".

    Any advice wold help. Just remember, I'm shy.. inexperienced, but OPEN-MINDED lol.
  • Mar 31, 2007, 06:25 PM
    willywonka22002
    Work out who his friends are so you can find out where and when he is out... if you hang round in the same crowds or places you are going to bump into each other eventually.

    Make sure you make yourself look stunning especially if you know you are going to see him out and about. 1st impressions and all that jazz

    Smile and be lovely but don't pay him 2much attention don't want to be over keen just interest him at 1st. Flirt with him show some interest. You need to make contact at some point make it positive. Generally I know you say you isn't dated much but try and not be nervous remember there are more guys than just him okay look around if you only have 1 love interest its likely your guna get hurt, you will just scare him if you come across desperate, make it seem as if you have other options.

    I'm sure it will all go okay, if you hit it off increase the flirting and say little drunken comments like your cute... with regard the friend zone this is a page that relates to men but it works the other way round worth a read Escaping the Friend Zone

    Update me if anything happens
  • May 17, 2007, 08:50 PM
    kbird
    Hey girl, I've been in your situation. I never dated until college, and I'm def. still a virgin. And was very shy when I first went off to my higher education. I don't know what happened, but I stopped 'what-if'ing myself. Just be natural, find out what his interests are (facebook really helps) and then see if you have anything in common and use that as a lead-way/ excuse. Only remember, don't become to stalkerish, guys are very sensitive when it comes to being pursued, they like being the chaser.. not the one being chased. Above all, just be yourself and have confidence in yourself... you have to start coming out of your shell at some point, and why not now? Use this guy as an excuse to start now.. and if he's not interested.. well then, what? There are plenty of other guys out there in the world... One thing I learned is that when I finally stopped looking for guys, they found me! Before searching for men.. you need to search for yourself, it's all about loving who you are. And one other thing, don't be ashamed about being a virgin, there's nothing wrong with it! I'm proud to be a virgin myself.

    Btw.. when I finally stopped worrying about guys and if I'd ever date, I found my current boyfriend in the least likely place.. it's like, when I finally shut my mind off searching, it opened my eyes and there he was! We've now been dating for about two years, despite the fact that it's long distance and he lives in the UK.

    Good luck with everything!
  • May 17, 2007, 08:59 PM
    sweetblood_15
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by punkarella
    There is this guy I like. I have only seen him around campus a few times. I asked people if they knew him and if so what info they can give me. So far I know his name and that he's a 19 year old freshman and he lives in my dorm building!

    I have never had a boyfriend before. I always end up falling into the friend zone and the guys that wanted to date me I turn them down not because I wasnt attracted to them but for the fact that I'm still a bit insecure and IM 20!

    My friends tell me to go and talk to this guy but Its not that easy, I dont know what to say!

    The fact that I waited till I got to college to consider dating has really put me behind most girls. People dont even believe I'm still a virgin lol. I feel like I'm more "talk" then "action" which is true because when I get myself in an intimate situation with a guy my mind is all for it but my body pushes them away lol if that makes sense.

    Anyway, I just want to know how I can get this guy to not only just notice me but to get him to like me as well. I would like to be more then friends with this guy WITHOUT falling into the "friend zone".

    Any advice wold help. Just remember, I'm shy.. inexperienced, but OPEN-MINDED lol.

    I'm pretty much the same too... I'll be all for something in my mind but a reaction is to puch it away because I'm scared and don't know the outcome of the situation... if I were you I would just be around him more and see if he notices you... make yourself... in is view I guess... make him notice you and try into it little by little...

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