[big mo]

My wife and I have been married 15 years and have 3 children. Her first delivery was very difficult. Since then (13 years ago) she says sex has not been the same. Sex is not painful; however, her orgasms feel "100 miles away". She also feels anxious before orgasm as if it may hurt; however, she says it never does. This has not keep us from having sex; however, she feels she lost something after the birth of our first child, that she will never get back. Is this common, and is there anything I can do to help her?

[phillysteakandcheese]

She could well have some kind of medical condition that has gone un-diagnosed - But after 15 years, I'm think it is more of a mental block...

I suspect that deep down in her subconscious, your wife has linked together the act of having sex with the pain of childbirth.

If this is the case, you need to break her pattern of thinking. Identify that link for her and discuss what you can do to help her. You might try something "for her only" by stimulating her orally, or using your fingers, or by using a toy, but avoiding intercourse.