[mckenzie134]

Wow! Its been 2 months and this is my story!! I'm 28 girlfriend 22
My Gf of 3 1/2 years wanted a break, I was devastated and probably still am 2 months has not been long enough. Hasn't helped that we have been in contact. Ive probably done all the wrong things and well pushed her further away...

She wanted a break and that's what she took our relationship had no worries and she was the one ringing each night and texting depending on me. Then one day she turned up and said I think we should have a break I ned to work on myself and find out who I am. Well what could I do I had to leave it I tried my best to work it out but nothing fixed what had been broken. Maybe I should have done this or that but then again I had done nothing wrong.

I now realise maybe she wanted me to propose she said we were living day to day and did not really have any plans, maybe she started to doubt the future we had together.

Its hard to realise that now as she did not say she loves me very often and was very reserved about her feelings. She did say it though a month before and well that was probably my cue but then many people have said even if you got engaged she may have had other doubts. It's a million thinghs to think of and I now know no matter what I will never know the real truth of the story for she probably does not know why she has done this herself she will be just telling herself she has made the right choice.

I have to accept this and heal as hard as I'm finding it and now starting to find blame on myself for not moving the relationship in a positive direction and giving us some focus in life probably set the relationship to be stale...

I thought she may be back but realise she won't be coming back when people leave they normally do not return... The reason they leave can sometimes be unknown, such a great and loving relationship and then its gone before you know it. Im hurting and when I see her she seems fine. I believe deep down inside though she has those nights where she looks at the telephone and thinks she should message but knows that I'm no longer there.

For all those people who get dumped and think they are forgotten I will tell you now when someone dumps you after a serious loving relationship they may act like they don't care but they don't forget you!! I always hear but what if they forget me... They don't if you had a bond that bond will take time to heal, for you it may take longer that is bacause you analyse why the break up occurred which is OK for a little, but in the end there is not a lot of working out to do, just realise they left you. They can get over or move on more quick because there is no analysing from there end there is nothing they just think they don't feel the same as they used to about you and think you may not be the one... which makes it easier, I tell you they can hurt as well but they don't feel the mental and anguish that the dumpee can feel the wonder of not knowing and the searching for answers they do not have to think about which allows them to think more clearly. Also I believe they are able to come up with reasons to support why they no longer want the relationship where as the other half looks at only the great aspects of the relationship...


Im still upset and missing my girl everyday it so hard. A long period of my time and I feel I may have let it slip away in the end by not taking what I wanted and not saying what I needed and by not going in my own direction and letting us both seem to go in her direction. I needed to keep the choices up and find out where we were heading my way not hers not leave the choices to her I had to be strong and know what I was doing...

Well everyone on this site with breakups similar to mine, it will take time and I know I will not forget but in time I hope I will heal... Maybe in time she will be back who will ever know if I get that call out of the blue what will I do what will I say, Only time will tell and that my friend I cannot wait for. What I do know is if I am in another relationship or still on my own I may have had some time to clear my head and work out in which direction I am going to head. Maybe this time I will understand what I want and maybe I will want her back maybe I won't. At the moment I do but so much time can change you're thoughts as so many people will say.

As I write this I still wonder what went so wrong and what I could have done , not much I realise not much at all. Its hard not to blame yourself even though you were in the right.
My heart still hurts its broken in half and it won't seem to mend. I still think how we xcame so close to being engaged yet now so far... I will live with that forever uncertainty

[dogma]

You should really give it a break and stop dwelling on the past you can't change it, so move forward with or without her you need to do what's best for you . You know the saying if you love something let it go if its meant to be it will come back to you. I had to do the same thing it wasn't easy but you must do it, IF their was dought in her mind show her she was wrong by becoming independent don't rely on her for nothing don't call her and don't show any weakness. Move forward and don't look back trust me I did the same thing for almost a year, and my friend gave me the same advice and I took it and I am a very happy man and we started talking again and she see's the changes I made and is very impressed, but do it for you not her move FORWARD.

[Jiser]

28 / 22 a big age gap there!