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    Anakin Ancona's Avatar
    Anakin Ancona Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 11, 2016, 07:39 PM
    Should I give up?
    Look, I have never ever loved someone before, until recently, and I know it's true, because I've never felt this way before, she just made me, thanks to her I've grown, lived, thought, felt, she means everything to me, but I'm confused, everyone says that we look "cute" together, even her family likes me, but I asked her out on valentine's day, I called, but got no answer, not until later, when a male voice said "I am her boyfriend", I just lost it, but then days later, I heard her say to one of her friends "I don't know how my father would react if I had a boyfriend", so she's single, but then, who was that guy... and also, I found out that she's obsessed with another guy, but I don't know how deeply. She doesn't hate me or sees me indifferent after telling her who I really am, after revealing her all my secrets, she even wanted to help me. But what bother's me, is that I don't know anything, what's worst, she only thinks of me as a friend, I know I could be better than the guy she likes, but I don't know how to get close. We talk, she doesn't mind about talking about deep stuff. And I just wonder, should I give up on her? Or do I stand a chance? If I do, then, how do I take it?
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Apr 11, 2016, 07:52 PM
    Its hormones not love. In time you will learn they are vastly different. Also you only just asked her out. So you really don't even know her yet. Also in time you will understand the significance of that. SO you ask.. if she doesn't accept you move along to another that might strike your fancy, and you don't plan out your life with that one before you ask them out.

    The absolute worst thing you can do... is plan your life with someone you haven't even dated yet... even once. You are setting yourself up for inevitable failure and disappointment when you do that. And just like Taxes and death...that is one more thing you can be absolutely certain of. Nobody that ever does that ever ends up with what they hope for or want. And you make some many assumptions and imposing your dreams of what you want her to be in your fantasy, and at this point that's exactly all it is. And reality is NEVER the same as a fantasy. And your fantasy version of someone is never the same as the real person you haven't gotten to really know yet.

    Odds are that one really special person you will meet eventually will be the last person you expect..and none of the ones you had previously hope it will be.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #3

    Apr 11, 2016, 08:09 PM
    You don't love her, you have not even dated her. You have a serious crush. She has shown no signs that she sees you as anything other than a friend. Wake up from your dreaming and face reality. She is not the one.
    Anakin Ancona's Avatar
    Anakin Ancona Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #4

    Apr 11, 2016, 09:38 PM
    Thanks dudes... that really helped
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #5

    Apr 12, 2016, 05:03 PM
    Pretty obvious that you are deeper into her than she is you, and that never works out. Leave her alone.

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