Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855

    Feb 21, 2015, 02:35 PM
    You back off and see what happens. It is quite normal as you learn another person to see good, and not so good. When he is ready you will talk, but you have to allow him space to deal with himself, and act accordingly. In the meantime do your own thing.

    Of course you are concerned, and it's so easy to get use to the routine you have already established, but this may be a time for patience, as adjustments are needed,in both thinking and actions. No hurry though to figure it out, nor have the perfect solution.

    Just be cool and be observant, and did I mention, keep doing your own thing. It's a case of more facts will be revealed later, and who knows if that's a good thing, or a bad thing, and only you can know what you should do about it. Do what's best for you. What do you think?
    CFZD's Avatar
    CFZD Posts: 385, Reputation: 49
    Full Member

    Feb 21, 2015, 05:33 PM
    Good advice Tal!

    I always thought he is an honest person, he said he will never drink and things are going well, so I don't understand why he started to drink again.

    I really want to know why but if he is not telling I can't do much. I don't think it has anything to do with me so I will leave him alone until he is ready to talk about it.

    I won't text or call, until he talks to me this time.

    If I have a urge I will ask you first, you can calm me down, and teach me to learn to be patient. :)

    Thanks again Tal. Your advice is noted and followed!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855

    Feb 21, 2015, 06:13 PM
    Your right, it's not about you, or likely, not about the relationship either, but more about him, and the way he deals with his issues. Early dating is about fun, as you learn, but no reason to rush in to deeply into things so soon, and get stuck. As you learn about him, you will learn more about YOU, and how YOU handle things, so keep it real with yourself.

    It's a process, and you are only at the first steps.
    CFZD's Avatar
    CFZD Posts: 385, Reputation: 49
    Full Member

    Feb 21, 2015, 08:45 PM
    Thanks Tal. You are wonderful. Through the years you have taught me a lot. I will keep you posted. Good night for now. :-)
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692

    Feb 22, 2015, 01:00 AM
    It appears there is something wrong, he merely said, it is not about you, which appears to mean there is a problem, and he does not wish to share it with you.

    Did you specifically ask about the drinking? If you are really good friends you should be able to talk about anything.
    CFZD's Avatar
    CFZD Posts: 385, Reputation: 49
    Full Member

    Feb 22, 2015, 12:33 PM
    I asked he said it's personal choice if drinking again. I just gently said don't drink too much. A bit is fine.

    I don't want to be pushy and I will give him time to be alone.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions


Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Check out some similar questions!

My friend or aleast my supposed guy friend is ignoring me for no reason [ 1 Answers ]

So my friend I met last year I didn't know who he was until my sister pointed him out. My sister was in the same class as him and her friends knew him as well. So we talked but not a lot only when we saw each other but we joked around. It's not like we just said hi and bye. But everything changed...

Late 70's or early 80's movie with a guy who could swim with sharks [ 3 Answers ]

I'm trying to source the title of movie, possible a made for TV movie from the late 70's or early 80's that I watched as a child. I can only remember 2 scenes - near the beginning a swam across this small body of shark infested water and somehow ended up with an amulet or charm that, as long as it...

Can a straight guy friend fall for a gay guy like me? [ 2 Answers ]

It's been years now and I still find it hard to move on. I had a friend who use to be my trainee before and that time I had a boy friend. I admit it that even though I had a boy friend that time, I felt something to my friend. My friend is straight but we always have some mutual understanding. We...

My best guy friend had sex with my friend when I didn't show up to meet them.. [ 2 Answers ]

I had a friendship group of three, my best guy friend, a friend or a friend who had become a friend of mine and I. The best guy friend I had known since I was three months old. He was always so awkward with social situations so he'd rely on me to help him out. We were really trusting of one another...

Friend Likes Guy. Guy hates friend! [ 6 Answers ]

Hey, My best friend likes this guy right? All Well and Good? NO!! The Guy She Likes, thinks she's annoying and weird. The guy is like one of my closest friends, I could talk to him about it but my friend doesn't want me 2. She didn't want me to write this but I am because she needs advice! Any...

View more questions Search