[mandilicious]

I am in Texas and nearly eleven years ago, while I was pregnant with my son, I gave his father the option to walk away with the promise that I would never ask him for anything and I didn't even put a name on the birth certificate under Father. What I would like to know is what, if anything, needs to be done in the event another man comes in to our lives and wants to adopt my son? I have not been in contact with my son's father since I was nearly 5 months pregnant and have no idea where I would find him. I have never even considered this as a possibility before recently and I don't even know where to begin.

[Fr_Chuck]

An attempt will have to be made to find him, and serve him legal notice. Your agreement with father is not really legal and certainly not binding, the father had legal rights to ask for visitation at any time. You had legal rights to ask for child support at any time.

If you received any government assistance, the state could try and collect without your permission.

It will be much harder and much more costly to do it, without knowing where he is and having to search.

[ScottGem]

While you decided to let him off the hook, the law requires that he have rights until a court takes them away. Therefore, any court hearing a step parent adoption will require that you prove you have made a good faith attempt to contact him to get his approval for the adoption.

So, when and if the time comes that you decide to pursue a step parent adoption, you will need to consult an attorney to prepare the petition and guide in what you will need to do to satisfy the court.

[Luck0rN0t]

Are you sure you know who the father is? If not, then it would be really difficult to locate an unknown man... No DNA test, no name on birth certificate, no child support, no legal anything... father could be anyone, anywhere in the world... just saying.

[ScottGem]

Most women have a pretty good idea who the father is or can at least narrow it down to a few men. No the father couldn't "be anyone, anywhere in the world". It would have to be someone the OP had sex with within a limited span of time.

[AK lawyer]

In any event, to adopt the law usually requires that a best effort be made to notify the father, whoever he may be. In my experience, this is usually done by publication of a notice in the paper.

It's sometimes really funny: a notice addressed to "unknown father", the name of the child he or she will have after the adoption, and no name given for the mother. Almost no chance of the father getting actual notice, but that is often required. And publication of a legal ad (which almost nobody reads anyway) can be expensive.

Moral of the story: (if you absolutely must have sex with a man with whom you are not married) next time get a child support order against him immediately upon giving birth, even if you don't care about the money. That way you have a better chance of contacting him if and when an adoption is wanted.