Check out some similar questions!

Noone2014 · Mar 24, 2014, 06:31 AM

So much going on in my life, I hate school can't stand my teachers can't be bothered listening to my friends and all their winging or drama. Can't stand being in the same room as my mother and listening to her constantly asking me what's wrong or lecturing me on my behaviour. I feel like I just want to pack my things and leave. I don't know what to do I hate the thought of getting up in the morning and having to see these people. I hate my mom I know that's a horrible thing to say but you don't know her she's so nosey always in my business always snooping god I wish she would just stop. Now I sound like one of the complaining but it can't handle it anymore

smoothy · Mar 24, 2014, 06:43 AM

DO you honetly believe ANYTHING is going to be easier on your own? Well hate to tell you its going to be a LOT worse. You have it easier now than you will ever have it.

Upset a boss... you find yourself fired, upset your landlord... you find yourself having to find a new place to live. Don't show up for work. You don't get paid and you get told to not bother returning.

Don't get paid you don't eat, you don't get a place to live because you get thrown out, you don't have water, light or heat.

When you find fault with everyone and everything around you... the problem isn't there... but within yourself.

What do you do... stop expecting everything to go your way... its never going to happen... the best you can hope for is some things to go how you hope... when they do count your blessings.

As long as your parents pay the bills and are responsible for you... they are entitled to snoop. They are entitled to snoop even when they aren't. They brought you into this world and raised you. As long as you and them are breathing air..they are going to snoop....they snoop because they care.

WHat you really need is counceling. Do you have a councelor at your school? If not you could talk to your parents... who can make arraingements to see one.

J_9 · Mar 24, 2014, 06:46 AM

So is this why you want to overdose on codeine?

Noone2014 · Mar 24, 2014, 06:50 AM

Originally Posted by J_9

So is this why you want to overdose on codeine?

I don't want to overdose on codine I like the feeling I get when I take lots of it. I'm not unhappy I don't want to die.

joypulv · Mar 24, 2014, 06:53 AM

Very common (even among your classmates, and you probably don't even know it).
I went through it, and that was 50+ years ago.
As said, running away is worse.
And in relation to your other post, yes, you can die from too much codeine. Most overdoses fail, however, (you need a LOT and doctors won't give out enough for a fatal dose) and you end up in a hospital with your stomach pumped and sometimes some damage.

What I did was read and read and read, in my room, until I was done with high school (no computers then). Can you do that?

Noone2014 · Mar 24, 2014, 06:55 AM

I don't expect everything to go my way, I know that's not how this world works I'm not stupid. I would just like to be able to block my ears and not listen to everyone talking at me. My mother might be responsible for me but I would like to think I can have some sort of privacy, what she does is not caring but looking for reasons to yell at me..

smoothy · Mar 24, 2014, 07:08 AM

You don't get to do that... you have to listen to people even when you don't want to... Privacy is a privilege that's earned, its not an entitlement. Try behaving in the way she expects... then she won't have a reason.

Your "right to privacy" really doesn't apply as a child. And its not nearly as extensive as an adault as you might think.

Do you understand the saying... you reap what you sow? It means there are consequences to actions and behaviours. You have them as a kid... and you still have then as an adult. The fact is even dictators in third world countries are not exempt from them.

Again... you don't get to define what caring is... because you really have no serious responsibilities as a kid beyond school... you will grasp the significance of this when you are an adult , supporting yourself successfully and have kids of your own. Its something that as a teen... you don't yet have the maturity to understand yet. But in time you will.

The only thing you are entitled to is food, clothing and shelter. What exactly they are is dependent on those providing them, and what they can afford, and what they want them to be. They might not be what you want. If you get a choice...consider that a privledge.

Even as an adult..it might be many years until you can afford what you want....before then you settle for what you can afford.

Life is like that...you settle for what options you have availble to you. And you make the most of them. Stomping your feet and getting upset won't change anything. In fact it usually results in fewer options when you do it.

Noone2014 · Mar 24, 2014, 07:36 AM

I wouldn't mind listening to certain people if they had anything worth me listening to. My friends just complain about other people behind their back and then act like they are friends to their faces what a joke ! My mum goes through my room checks my phone ask me a million questions accuses me of being high all the time she tries and gets in my head and no matter how much I ignor her it never stops, caring I'd rather she just focus on my sister not me. Reap what I sow fair enough but I haven't done anything to her so why does she act this way? And why only towards me?

Cat1864 · Mar 24, 2014, 07:44 AM

I don't think you want to overdose. I think you want to run away mentally as well as physically. Drugs of any type may seem like an escape but in reality they are a trap that holds you where you are or puts you in a worse situation.

You haven't said how old you are or how long before you graduate.

For someone who is 'happy' you seem full of 'hate'. You have a choice. You can hold on to the hate. Look at everything in a negative way. Build up walls of anger and resentment. Or you can decide to change your attitude. Get involved in activities that help you feel good and positive about yourself and life. Focus on learning about things you like. Focus on doing well in your classes whether you like the teachers or not. Make new friends who might have more in common with you than your current friends.

Look at your own behavior and attitude around the house. Do you help out? Do you act like a member of the family or do you hide away ignoring everyone and everything? Do you keep up with your school/home work? Are you failing your classes? Are you always tardy or 'home sick' a lot? Do you spend hours on the computer or texting with people you shouldn't? Are you giving off signals that you can't be trusted?

Ask your mother to sit down and talk with you about boundaries. Find out why she is concerned and 'invading' your privacy.

smoothy · Mar 24, 2014, 08:07 AM

Originally Posted by Noone2014

I wouldn't mind listening to certain people if they had anything worth me listening to. My friends just complain about other people behind their back and then act like they are friends to their faces what a joke ! My mum goes through my room checks my phone ask me a million questions accuses me of being high all the time she tries and gets in my head and no matter how much I ignor her it never stops, caring I'd rather she just focus on my sister not me. Reap what I sow fair enough but I haven't done anything to her so why does she act this way? And why only towards me?

Ok, good... you got the point I was trynig to make... and answer to some of this other points. You see thiings only from your own perspective. With the hormone swings you are barely able to deal with at your age.. its easy to see things in an exaggerated manner. Its not uncommon and its very likely you are doing it right now. Toss in the tendencies of a teen to exaggerate in their behaviour... A simple comment or action ends up blown out of porportion. Surely you have seen your friends doing this.

Ever hear the saying... the squeaky wheel gets the grease? What it means is your actions in the home are making you the squeaky wheel... and are drawing their attention more than your sister is. Erratic behaviour is always more noticeable to others than it is to the person who is acting erratically.

The other thing... "her trying to get in your head"... and your mother "asking you a million questions" Clearly exagerations... understand how much a million of something is? And you are aware.. people talk with each other all the time... they even ask questions... why should your family be any different than anyone else. It's a normal social behaviour.

joypulv · Mar 24, 2014, 08:23 AM

Wow, you have a phone of your own... that says a lot. Who pays for it each month? Somehow I doubt you do. You are better off than half the world right there.

Yes, some parents are horrible. My mother accused me of things I didn't do either, the main one being sex. I DO know what it's like to be screamed at for nothing at all. At that was before the days we have now, with teenage girls doing some really naïve things online.

You didn't answer my question...

Noone2014 · Mar 24, 2014, 08:23 AM

I don't think I'm full of hate just tired, tired of everything. I try to see the positive things but trust me its not easy being in high school to find anything positive. I don't fail classes but I'm not at the top either. I am always at school my mum only let's me stay at home when I'm dying and there is no need to skip classes when I can sit in the back put my headphones in and not be noticed. I just turned 15. I don't really know what signals I could possibly give of to make my mother act the way she does. I can't speak to her I haven't spoken to my mum in about 4 months or my sister if I did I would say something I would regret so I don't say anything I do all the chores she asks of me

Originally Posted by joypulv

Wow, you have a phone of your own... that says a lot. Who pays for it each month? Somehow I doubt you do. You are better off than half the world right there.

Yes, some parents are horrible. My mother accused me of things I didn't do either, the main one being sex. I DO know what it's like to be screamed at for nothing at all. At that was before the days we have now, with teenage girls doing some really naïve things online.

You didn't answer my question...

Sorry I do read when I'm at home, I do have a job and I brought my own phone and buy my own credit I don't ask for anything I'm great full for what they provide for me

smoothy · Mar 24, 2014, 08:31 AM

Originally Posted by Noone2014

I don't think I'm full of hate just tired, tired of everything. I try to see the positive things but trust me its not easy being in high school to find anything positive. I don't fail classes but I'm not at the top either. I am always at school my mum only let's me stay at home when I'm dying and there is no need to skip classes when I can sit in the back put my headphones in and not be noticed. I just turned 15. I don't really know what signals I could possibly give of to make my mother act the way she does. I can't speak to her I haven't spoken to my mum in about 4 months or my sister if I did I would say something I would regret so I don't say anything I do all the chores she asks of me

Read the highlighted part again... you have your answer why in that same highlighted part. Thats not only just a red flag.....but bells, whistles and fireworks as well.

Homegirl 50 · Mar 24, 2014, 08:39 AM

You not speaking to your mom or your sister, your taking codeine, your sitting in class with head phones on, your complaining, all of these are signs there is something wrong and your mom is picking up in them. The fact that your taking codeine is a big enough thing to make her curious. Most moms are not dumb, when there is a problem we know it. Your attitude about your friends is pretty negative. You're doing an awful lot of complaining about them, but you're 15, hormonal, doing drugs, (codeine is a drug) so you are probably not a joy to be around either.
Speak to a counselor at your school. Maybe he/she can set you up with someone to talk to on a regular basis. You are your biggest problem

Noone2014 · Mar 24, 2014, 08:42 AM

Originally Posted by smoothy

Read the highlighted part again... you have your answer why in that same highlighted part. Thats not only just a red flag.....but bells, whistles and fireworks as well.

Why is it so hard for her to understand I don't want to speak to her I do as she asks I don't get in trouble well hardly ever. Why does she talk talk talk

Homegirl 50 · Mar 24, 2014, 08:47 AM

When you are living with someone who takes care of you, (your mom) and you don't want to talk to them, that is a problem. How can you do that to your mom? You talk about your friends not having anything to say worth hearing and about how immature they all are, you are acting like a brat. Your mom talks to you because she loves you and wants to know how things are going with you. She talks to you because it is rude to live in the house with people and ignore them because you don't feel like talking.
Get some counseling.

smoothy · Mar 24, 2014, 08:48 AM

Originally Posted by Noone2014

Why is it so hard for her to understand I don't want to speak to her I do as she asks I don't get in trouble well hardly ever. Why does she talk talk talk

Because that's NOT a normal behaviour... you are not behaving in a normal manner and she sees this... she's your mum... and contrary to what you believe... she does care.

If she let you do things they way you want... you will certainly make a disaster of your life before you are an adult. One that you might spend the rest of your natural life trying to correct.

How can I be so certain... because I have the benefit of a lot of years experience seeing people very much like you do just that.

Noone2014 · Mar 24, 2014, 08:53 AM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

You not speaking to your mom or your sister, your taking codeine, your sitting in class with head phones on, your complaining, all of these are signs there is something wrong and your mom is picking up in them. The fact that your taking codeine is a big enough thing to make her curious. Most moms are not dumb, when there is a problem we know it. Your attitude about your friends is pretty negative. You're doing an awful lot of complaining about them, but you're 15, hormonal, doing drugs, (codeine is a drug) so you are probably not a joy to be around either.
Speak to a counselor at your school. Maybe he/she can set you up with someone to talk to on a regular basis. You are your biggest problem

I don't normally complain I don't speak to people so I can't complain guess I just needed to get it out, in a way I felt comfortable with. And your right I'm just some hormonal teenager who it sucks to be around. It's not like I take codeine all the time so I don't speak big deal she should be happy I don't she wouldn't like it if I did

Originally Posted by smoothy

Because that's NOT a normal behaviour... you are not behaving in a normal manner and she sees this... she's your mum... and contrary to what you believe... she does care.

If she let you do things they way you want... you will certainly make a disaster of your life before you are an adult. One that you might spend the rest of your natural life trying to correct.

How can I be so certain... because I have the benefit of a lot of years experience seeing people very much like you do just that.

My life is already a disaster and there is nothing she can do about it there is no point in talking to her you might think I hurt he by not talking to her but its better for us both this way. I can do this myself I just need some quiet to think it all through I need her to stop just for a bit. But I don't know how to get her to understand

smoothy · Mar 24, 2014, 09:12 AM

You can't fix it yourself because you don't have the benefit of seeing the situation with a clear mind... nor do you have the benefit of ife experience to know the right way and the wrong way to do something.

The fact your life is such a disater (your words) now... is because you've been making all the wrong decisions and doing all the wrong things.

At 15 you don't have the answers you need to fix it. That's not a swipe at you.. its just a fact that some things require a lot of experience to understand... much less fix. And you are the least equipped individual being you lack the experience or the objectivity needed. Because you are in the middle of it. Even an adult is not in a position to self diagnose because even if they have the experience... they will lack the needed objectivity to see things how they really are... and not how they think they are. The two many times are not the same.

Also...the things that seem so importat to a teen...are usually not to anyone else more than a few years older....and the things a teen thinks are insignificant....can and many times do have life long ramnifications.

Noone2014 · Mar 24, 2014, 09:29 AM

Originally Posted by smoothy

You can't fix it yourself because you don't have the benefit of seeing the situation with a clear mind... nor do you have the benefit of ife experience to know the right way and the wrong way to do something.

The fact your life is such a disater (your words) now... is because you've been making all the wrong decisions and doing all the wrong things.

At 15 you don't have the answers you need to fix it. That's not a swipe at you.. its just a fact that some things require a lot of experience to understand... much less fix. And you are the least equipped individual being you lack the experience or the objectivity needed. Because you are in the middle of it. Even an adult is not in a position to self diagnose because even if they have the experience... they will lack the needed objectivity to see things how they really are... and not how they think they are. The two many times are not the same.

Also...the things that seem so importat to a teen...are usually not to anyone else more than a few years older....and the things a teen thinks are insignificant....can and many times do have life long ramnifications.

I just don't want to talk!! This is my decision you might think it's the wrong one but its not. Nothing can be fixed if I don't speak nothing will get broken. It's easy I need quiet she needs move on leave me alone