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Alton Conerly · Oct 15, 2013, 07:27 AM

I've been divorced since 2010 from her, she has since moved from Louisiana to Florida with my 12 year old daughter (I agreed to the relocation because all I want is for my daughter to be happy, now I'm regretting it!). I've been informed that my ex wife has "flags" on her drivers license and it's been expired since 2011. So, she is driving our daughter around with an expired DL as far as I know. Now this is where it gets strange, last night my son (21 years old) told me she in fact did have a Fla. DL, but, I was told by the DMV in La. That she couldn't get one because the "flags" are nationwide. I've known my ex to lie and cheat, scam, etc. in the past so I wouldn't put it past her to have purchased a fake Fla. DL.

Recently, I made her take a drug screen in Fla. Which I paid for, the results came back negative but the name of the person that took the test is not her new married name nor her old married name. That kind of puts a red flag up for me but my attorney at the time (fired her) didn't seem to care. My question is, why would she use her birth given middle name (which has been dropped for my last name) and my last name as the ID at the drug screening facility? I did a "people search" for her new married name and nothing comes up, like she never existed. Could she have changed her name, stolen someone's identity, or does she just have many aliases with ID's for each?

Together we owed taxes from before our marriage, I'm paying them but she doesn't and doesn't seem worried about it (she was ordered to pay half the tax debt). So, can I pro se, file a motion for discovery with her attorney to find out what's going on, like for a copy of her DL, a copy of the ID she used to take the drug screen, a copy of her last tax filling? If so, how do I write (word) it?

Thanks in advance, Trey >Last name removed<.

AK lawyer · Oct 15, 2013, 09:32 AM

... Together we owed taxes from before our marriage, I'm paying them but she doesn't and doesn't seem worried about it(she was ordered to pay half the tax debt). So, can I pro se, file a motion for discovery with her attorney to find out what's going on ...

You do understand that you are probably jointly and severally liable for the taxes, right? So if she fails to pay her share you will be stuck for it.

You can make a discovery request to her divorce attorney but, I will guess, the lawyer will probably respond that he no longer represents her. Then you would have to serve the requests on her, and only if she fails to respond in a timely manner would you file a motion to enforce discovery. I would be surprised if this gets you any information.

The fact that she was driving your daughter around without a license is not cause for concern about your daughter's safety. DLs are revoked, suspended, etc. for many reasons which have nothing to do with safety.

Alton Conerly · Oct 15, 2013, 10:25 AM

Originally Posted by AK lawyer

You do understand that you are probably jointly and severally liable for the taxes, right? So if she fails to pay her share you will be stuck for it.

You can make a discovery request to her divorce attorney but, I will guess, the lawyer will probably respond that he no longer represents her. Then you would have to serve the requests on her, and only if she fails to respond in a timely manner would you file a motion to enforce discovery. I would be surprised if this gets you any information.

The fact that she was driving your daughter around without a license is not cause for concern about your daughter's safety. DLs are revoked, suspended, etc. for many reasons which have nothing to do with safety.

I understand that the IRS or state doesn't care who pays as long as it's paid. So, if the court ordered her to pay half, is there anything I could do to collect her "half" of the taxes? And if she is using fake identification to get through life, is that a lesson our children should be exposed to? The fact that she filled her taxes separately that one time to get a larger refund and lied to me about filling mine still kills me. Btw, as far as I know she is still represented by her attorney, which is another problem. He is not to bad at making me look like I'm the evil person in all of this mess. Ok, how about a civil suit?

cdad · Oct 15, 2013, 02:23 PM

Originally Posted by Alton Conerly

I understand that the IRS or state doesn't care who pays as long as it's paid. So, if the court ordered her to pay half, is there anything I could do to collect her "half" of the taxes? And if she is using fake identification to get through life, is that a lesson our children should be exposed to? The fact that she filled her taxes separately that one time to get a larger refund and lied to me about filling mine still kills me. Btw, as far as I know she is still represented by her attorney, which is another problem. He is not to bad at making me look like I'm the evil person in all of this mess. Ok, how about a civil suit?

No you don't want a civil suit. The reason being is that it could be discharged in a bankruptcy. You want it to stay with the divorce decree so it can not be discharged. What you might be able to do is make the courts aware that no payments have been made by her and have her charged with contempt.

Alton Conerly · Oct 15, 2013, 05:00 PM

Originally Posted by cdad

No you don't want a civil suit. The reason being is that it could be discharged in a bankruptcy. You want it to stay with the divorce decree so it can not be discharged. What you might be able to do is make the courts aware that no payments have been made by her and have her charged with contempt.

That's why I got rid of the attorney I had, I've asked to file contempt charges since April. She told me the practice of law is a slow process and I had to wait, all the while she's calling me just enough to get paid. Ugh! That's another topic for another time. Lol! Ok I reread my initial posting and I hope y'all understand the taxes owed are from our marriage, not before, oops. Anyway, lets say I have at least 5 contempt charges against her with all the evidence well documented, should I still hire another attorney? I truly believe I could do this pro se if I had the time to do a little (or a lot of)research about everything from how to file to proper courtroom procedure, but I feel that's more time waisted. I'm so sick of this whole mess, I just can't imagine how my ex and her attorney have made me look so bad in the eyes of this judge, which I think poses a huge problem. Either she has the best attorney in Louisiana or this judge just doesn't like men, in my opinion! Any way to change judges? And I'm guessing you're going to tell me to hire an attorney. Advice on what I should tell an attorney when I met one, like, should I just tell them all I want is to file the contempt charges, and pray that the judge sees her true colors and regain custody of my baby girl, or seek custody from the beginning?

ScottGem · Oct 15, 2013, 05:18 PM

Originally Posted by Alton Conerly

all the while she's calling me just enough to get paid.

That's not true. You would be obligated to pay support even if she didn't call you.

Originally Posted by Alton Conerly

Anyway, lets say I have at least 5 contempt charges against her with all the evidence well documented,

I don't see any contempt charges at all. Maybe she could be held in contempt for not paying her share of the taxes. But I think it's a long shot that a judge would issue a contempt charge on that.

So what other contempt charges do you think you have?

On the other hand you may have cause to get primary custody if she is breaking the law AND you can prove it.

cdad · Oct 15, 2013, 05:30 PM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

That's not true. You would be obligated to pay support even if she didn't call you.

I think you are mistaken or maybe I am. The statement the OP made reguarding your response was about the Attorney they had had before. Atleast that is how I understood it. I could be wrong.

ScottGem · Oct 15, 2013, 06:00 PM

Originally Posted by cdad

I think you are mistaken or maybe I am. The statement the OP made reguarding your response was about the Attorney they had had before. Atleast that is how I understood it. I could be wrong.

Rereading, it could be referring to the attorney not the ex. I thought it was referring to the ex. Hopefully the OP will clarify.

talaniman · Oct 15, 2013, 06:30 PM

Hopefully the OP gets a lawyer and lays this in their lap before he goes nuts. Or gets a father's rights advocacy group to help him get a good lawyer.

Alton Conerly · Oct 15, 2013, 07:14 PM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

That's not true. You would be obligated to pay support even if she didn't call you.

I don't see any contempt charges at all. Maybe she could be held in contempt for not paying her share of the taxes. But I think it’s a long shot that a judge would issue a contempt charge on that.

So what other contempt charges do you think you have?

On the other hand you may have cause to get primary custody if she is breaking the law AND you can prove it.

Sorry Scott , I was writing of my attorney getting paid not my ex wife, I've never missed a payment nor have I been late, actually I have many times paid for more than I should've because of my ex's gambling addiction. I found a letter that my daughter wrote the other day, it would make you cry your eyes out, even though you don't know my daughter. Evidently there were times that despite the $1571 a month in support I paid, she had NO FOOD TO EAT! Now if you want to help me I would greatly appreciate it. One contempt is the fact that our daughter is not in therapy, the court orders her to "remain in therapy" and she is not. Easily proven. The court orders that if the auto insurance lapses on the car I paid the note on and my ex used, "Mr.Conerly will take possession of the vehicle". Well instead of letting me take the car she hid it from me until the police had it towed away by a salvage yard, now the salvage yard owns the car and I still pay a note on it. I have all documents, emails, letters, etc. to prove this as well. The court orders the we discuss decisions made about the child's education, health, discipline, etc. my ex flat refuses to speak to me about anything. I find out about Dr. Visits only from my daughter weeks after it happened. From November until the end of school last year my daughter missed 20 days of school, I was never told about any of them. I think that should be enough, if you don't please let me know what you would do. Thanks.

Alton Conerly · Oct 15, 2013, 07:23 PM

Originally Posted by cdad

I think you are mistaken or maybe I am. The statement the OP made reguarding your response was about the Attorney they had had before. Atleast that is how I understood it. I could be wrong.

Thanks, you're right. I've always paid my support plus some. Father advocacy group?

ScottGem · Oct 15, 2013, 07:39 PM

First, I DO want to help you. But all I can do is respond accurately to what you have posted. The only contempt I think the court will care about is the therapy issue. But I think the other issues will help you get custody. So my advice is to forget asking the court to cite her for contempt. But rather to petition for a change in custody. As grounds for that change use the therapy issue, the missing school days, the identity issues, the lack of contact.