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New Member
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Oct 7, 2013, 06:17 AM
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Executor of estate virginia
What do you do if a will states that real estate is to be sold and divided equally among the living siblings, but the executor feels one of the siblings owes the estate money for writing herself checks and taking the father to the bank to withdraw money out of his IRA account all with the father having alzheimers?
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Uber Member
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Oct 7, 2013, 06:31 AM
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Hello C:
You hire your own lawyer and challenge what the executor did.
excon
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New Member
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Oct 7, 2013, 06:46 AM
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 Originally Posted by excon
Hello C:
You hire your own lawyer and challenge what the executor did.
excon
It was not the executor that took the money!
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Uber Member
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Oct 7, 2013, 06:58 AM
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Hello again, C:
It was not the executor that took the money!
Ahhhh..
Then the executor ACTS upon his or her "feelings", and SUES the sibling to get the money back. Maybe the sibling committed fraud, and that would be a police matter. If I was the executor, I'd write the offending sibling a letter giving them 10 days to pay the money back, or face the consequences, and I'd LIST them. I'd SEND that letter certified, return receipt requested, and I'd send ALL the interested parties a copy..
If that doesn't get the money back, SUE!
Excon
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Uber Member
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Oct 7, 2013, 07:20 AM
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Hello again, C:
I've had another thought... The executor COULD subtract what the sibling took from his or her proceeds from the sale.. That way, if the sibling didn't like it, it would be incumbent upon THEM to sue, and not the executor on behalf of the estate.
The sibling probably doesn't have the money to pay back, so subtracting their share seems to be a better alternative. There's probably no accounting either.. If so, the estate needs an accountant.
excon
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current pert
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Oct 7, 2013, 07:29 AM
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Please be clear about 'writing herself checks,' which is a separate matter from getting your dad to the bank to withdraw from his IRA (something everyone should do while alive, because that's the nature of IRAs). Did she forge his name, or sign hers? And if she signed hers, I'm assuming that she had joint signing or POA to do so? If not, the bank is liable.
And if dad had Alzheimer's, who was taking care of him while all this was going on? If that sibling, is she not entitled to money for household expenses? Or were all those being taken care of in some other way?
I'm not defending her or anyone, at least not until we hear the details.
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New Member
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Oct 7, 2013, 08:35 AM
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 Originally Posted by joypulv
Please be clear about 'writing herself checks,' which is a separate matter from getting your dad to the bank to withdraw from his IRA (something everyone should do while alive, because that's the nature of IRAs). Did she forge his name, or sign hers? And if she signed hers, I'm assuming that she had joint signing or POA to do so? If not, the bank is liable.
And if dad had Alzheimer's, who was taking care of him while all this was going on? If that sibling, is she not entitled to money for household expenses? Or were all those being taken care of in some other way?
I'm not defending her or anyone, at least not til we hear the details.
She was helping to take care of him but was writing checks out to cash and having him sign them. No receipts! She did not live with him. She was also using his money to pay her bills like rent, lights, etc. and also tag teaming with her daughter to obtain money in which her daughter used to purchase drugs.
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Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
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Oct 7, 2013, 09:28 AM
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Ok, here's the thing. If she was helping to take care of him, then she could have been using the cash for his care. Since it was cash, its hard to prove what it was spent on.
However, the executor does have a right decide to reduce her share by what she can prove was spent. Seems the executor would have cancelled checks to show the expenditures.
As excon suggested, deduct that amount from what the sibling gets. I would put that money away until any litigation is settled, then divide it among the remaining siblings.
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New Member
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Oct 7, 2013, 10:44 AM
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 Originally Posted by ScottGem
Ok, here's the thing. If she was helping to take care of him, then she could have been using the cash for his care. Since it was cash, its hard to prove what it was spent on.
However, the executor does have a right decide to reduce her share by what she can prove was spent. Seems the executor would have cancelled checks to show the expenditures.
As excon suggested, deduct that amount from what the sibling gets. I would put that money away until any litigation is settled, then divide it among the remaining siblings.
Thank you. We have a lot of cancelled checks with her endorsement on the back with no receipts as I mentioned. We also have those checks made payable to her landlord and others. We just don't want to do anything wrong and get into any kind of legal trouble.
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Expert
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Oct 7, 2013, 12:18 PM
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To the OP: you say you have lots of cancelled checks - can you tell who signed the checks? Was your father's signature forged? If not, though I understand the desire to right what appears to be a wrong, the executor has no authority to go back to times while the father was still alive and double-guess what his state of mind may or may not have been. Even though the father had alzheimer's apparently he was never declared incompetent, so if the father decided to give one of his children money while he was still alive that was his right. If I was the daughter I would claim that these were gifts, and if the executor tried to cut me out of the will or give me a smaller portion of my inheritance I would threaten to sue. The only recourse the executor has here is to try to prove that the checks were forged or coerced, or that they were a loan and not a gift, but that's going to be difficult to do.
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Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
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Oct 7, 2013, 12:38 PM
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What ebaines said. An argument might be made that these were advances on her inheritance, but it wouldn't be easy to prove.
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Uber Member
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Oct 7, 2013, 01:41 PM
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Hello again, C:
What doesn't look provable NOW, may be imminently more provable AFTER an accountant puts the books in order. That's your next step.
excon
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Internet Research Expert
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Oct 7, 2013, 02:12 PM
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What I would do in a case like this is, do as your instructed by the will. But when it comes to the ditribution of funds for the person in question I would deduct the suspected amount and put it in a trust. Explain to them the descrepency that has been found and ask for an explination before the funds can be released. If they claim the "cash" was an advance in what was to be given then that portion goes to the rest of the heirs. If they were the sole caretaker you also have to consider reasonable pay for the work they were doing vs a private nurse or facility. They may by the laws of your state be entitled to compensation and that is what the checks may be about.
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current pert
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Oct 8, 2013, 06:01 AM
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My bank has a minimum charge of 2,500 for a trust...
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Expert
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Oct 8, 2013, 06:34 AM
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No need to create a trust. The exceutor just keeps the estate open and keeps the money in the estate account until the issue is resolved.
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Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
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Oct 8, 2013, 06:38 AM
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A trust account is not necessary. ANY account in the estate name is sufficient. Though the money should be kept separate. This was what I meant by putting the money away until any litigation is settled.
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New Member
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Oct 8, 2013, 06:51 AM
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I guess I should have never asked a question on here because the story is too long to tell what this family member has done. If only everyone knew the WHOLE story they would truly understand why the executor feels she doesn't deserve anything. And yes there were cancelled checks showing "LOAN" written in the memo. Checks were handed to the father to sign with him trusting the daughter to do the right thing. On the other hand he had no clue what she was doing. Very sad that children take advantage of their own parents when they have been taking care of them their whole life. It's also sad that a 61 year old woman can't stand on her own two feet!
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Uber Member
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Oct 8, 2013, 06:59 AM
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Hello C:
the story is too long to tell
We GET it. But, STORY is not the stuff we're interested in. Frankly, our advice will also protect the sibling in case you're WRONG.
That's exactly WHY we suggest that you actually get to the BOTTOM of it, instead of accusing the sister when you have NO proof. That's the reason I suggested that you have the books AUDITED. When YOU look at a check with "loan" written in the memo, YOU have NO IDEA what it means, or what to DO about it. A CPA DOES. IF this sister ripped off her father, HE'LL be able to determine it.
Excon
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New Member
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Oct 8, 2013, 07:10 AM
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 Originally Posted by excon
Hello C:We GET it. But, STORY is not the stuff we're interested in. Frankly, our advice will also protect the sibling in case you're WRONG.
That's exactly WHY we suggest that you actually get to the BOTTOM of it, instead of accusing the sister when you have NO proof. That's the reason I suggested that you have the books AUDITED. When YOU look at a check with "loan" written in the memo, YOU have NO IDEA what it means, or what to DO about it. A CPA DOES. IF this sister ripped off her father, HE'LL be able to determine it.
excon
The thing is we do have proof!
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Uber Member
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Oct 8, 2013, 07:23 AM
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Hello again, C:
The thing is we do have proof!
Then the solution is simple.. Sell the house, divide the proceeds, and pay the offending sister with receipts for the money she stole. If she doesn't like it, she'll sue. If it winds up that she TOOK more than her share, you SUE HER.
But, your "proof", probably ISN'T proof enough for a court of law, and it's NOT proof enough for me. I think what you have is rank speculation.
So, we're back to getting the books AUDITED..
Excon
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