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    xoxol's Avatar
    xoxol Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 27, 2013, 07:50 PM
    I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 months and I don't know what to do?
    Last year I started talking to my boyfriend and we were on and off for about 4-5 months , we got back together and had been until today. I couldn't stay with him we fought too much and it was draining me, I love and care for him so much. He wants to get back with me but I can't I think it's not for the best right now. I know he will persuade me to get back with him as he has done it before I need help/ideas of how I can be stronger.. I'm so upset and feel like I did the wrong thing .
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #2

    Sep 27, 2013, 07:53 PM
    List five things you two fight about.
    xoxol's Avatar
    xoxol Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Sep 27, 2013, 07:57 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    List five things you two fight about.
    Not seeing each other
    Him Texting others
    If I don't ring/text the moment I wake up
    Talking on the phone going to sleep
    There's more but my head is all over the place
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #4

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:00 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by xoxol View Post
    Not seeing each other
    Him Texting others
    If I don't ring/text the moment I wake up
    Talking on the phone going to sleep
    There's more but my head is all over the place
    That sounds like scrappy little kids on the playground.

    Could we stop making such demands of each other?
    xoxol's Avatar
    xoxol Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:01 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    That sounds like scrappy little kids on the playground.

    Could we stop making such demands of each other?
    What does that mean ?
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,691, Reputation: 1547
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    #6

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:02 PM
    Him texting others... like what, other women you mean?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #7

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by xoxol View Post
    What does that mean ?
    It sounds like you are trying to control each other, you trying to keep him around or he control you -- he can have his fun and games while you are the devoted girlfriend.

    How about if you don't call him before bed? How about if he stops texting others (why does he do that?)? How about if you stop calling him when you wake up?
    xoxol's Avatar
    xoxol Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by odinn7 View Post
    Him texting others...like what, other women you mean?
    Yes , like one time he told me he couldn't talk but it ended up that he was on the phone with her

    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    It sounds like you are trying to control each other, you trying to keep him around or he control you -- he can have his fun and games while you are the devoted girlfriend.

    How about if you don't call him before bed? How about if he stops texting others (why does he do that?)? How about if you stop calling him when you wake up?
    We already broke up .
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #9

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:07 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by xoxol View Post
    Yes , like one time he told me he couldn't talk but it ended up that he was on the phone with her
    And you put up with that?? I'd never speak to him again! ***ADDED**** Oh, but you want to get back with him and be treated like dirt (because you LOVE him)?
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    xoxol Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:09 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    And you put up with that???? I'd never speak to him again!
    He apologised and I forgave him, well at least I thought I did I just keep thinking that there's always going to be someone better than me
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #11

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:11 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by xoxol View Post
    He apologised and I forgave him, well at least I thought I did I just keep thinking that there's always going to be someone better than me
    It has nothing to do with how good you are. It has everything to do with how HE is.
    xoxol's Avatar
    xoxol Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:13 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    It has nothing to do with how good you are. It has everything to do with how HE is.
    He has changed , it just seems as though he is trying to hard now like he always wants to be there talking to me and I can't have anyone else including friends in my life..
    odinn7's Avatar
    odinn7 Posts: 7,691, Reputation: 1547
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    #13

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:16 PM
    He doesn't let you have friends? He's controlling you if that's how it is.

    Surely you can find someone else... just be done with him and tell him it's over... then stop falling for his lines and running back to him.
    xoxol's Avatar
    xoxol Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #14

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:18 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by odinn7 View Post
    He doesn't let you have friends? He's controlling you if that's how it is.

    Surely you can find someone else...just be done with him and tell him it's over...then stop falling for his lines and running back to him.
    Thank you for all your help .
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #15

    Sep 27, 2013, 08:19 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by xoxol View Post
    Thank you for all your help .
    What will you do? Can you be strong and get into a No Contact mode?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #16

    Sep 28, 2013, 12:52 PM
    Leave him alone, completely alone to give thought to what you want to do, and how you want to move forward since talking to him adds confusion, not clarity. This on/off conflict is no good, and seems to keep happening over, and over again. That's no good either.

    How old are you both?

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