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josef2k13 · Aug 3, 2013, 10:46 AM

Hi my name is Jose and I'm 14 years old. It started when I was about 9 or 10 when I finally told my parents that my cousin raped me. There was this whole investigation and stuff but during that time I was curious of the whole gay thing so I looked online. My cousin showed me a gay site so I was looking at it and I saw videos and stuff. Once in awhile I will go back because he told to and I was little so I did. I didn't think anything wrong of it.

I left it in my history and my mom saw it. She was mad but never talked about it so I didn't think anything of it. So I used my dads iPad and accidentally left it on browser and never cleared the history. So my dad ended up finding out and that's when I told about my cousin. My parents still think I'm gay. I know.

I will hear my dad on the phone talking so someone and saying "ya my son he's about 13 but I think he is gay and he always been surrounded by girls he's whole life". I will stop listening then. It would affect me because they assume things that's not true, but the worst part is can't talk to them, it's a weird subject to talk about to your parents so... what should I do?

odinn7 · Aug 3, 2013, 10:49 AM

Stop worrying about what they think... and if you are gay, so what? Why does it really matter? It doesn't.

I am sorry that this happened to you but beyond that, don't worry so much about their thoughts on this. If you can find the courage, talk to them... otherwise, let them think what they want.

Curlyben · Aug 3, 2013, 10:51 AM

Punctuation helps immensely, but rampant hormones account for so much more.

talaniman · Aug 3, 2013, 11:45 AM

Yes its difficult to talk to parents about anything but try it any way.

N0help4u · Aug 3, 2013, 11:48 AM

Tell them you think this girl at school is hot but you think you should wait until you are old enough to be in a relationship before you ask her out.
Oh and quit going anywhere near those sites.

Homegirl 50 · Aug 3, 2013, 07:34 PM

If you are not engaging in that activity they will soon get over the gay thing. Maybe they think what happened to you has affected you.
What happened to the person who did this to you? Don't you worry about it. As you get older they will stop worrying so much

joypulv · Aug 4, 2013, 02:54 AM

How do YOU feel about your sexual preferences? Are you willing to talk about them here, such as when you masturbate? You have a common name and no one is going to know who you are or where you are. Are you able to sort out how you feel sexually about girls and boys?
It's common for children who have been raped (even raped through what passes as seduction) to develop an interest or sometimes an obsession in more of the same. It's important to talk it out and if you can, talk with a therapist. Your parents would have to help with that. Could you tell them you'd like to see one?

aliseaodo · Aug 4, 2013, 06:42 PM

This post sounded veeerryy familiar, I was getting a déjà vu type feeling - I found a veeerry similar post here:https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...ot-752367.html
With the answers given on your post, along with the answers given on the old post, you have quite a few good suggestions on what to do.

Homegirl 50 · Aug 4, 2013, 06:50 PM

Originally Posted by aliseaodo

This post sounded veeerryy familiar, I was getting a deja vu type feeling - I found a veeerry similar post here:https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...ot-752367.html
with the answers given on your post, along with the answers given on the old post, you have quite a few good suggestions on what to do.

I thought about this post as well. I thought it was the same person at first. But yes the advice is appropriate for this one as well.

josef2k13 · Aug 4, 2013, 07:44 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

I thought about this post as well. I thought it was the same person at first. But yes the advice is appropriate for this one as well.

No that was not me must been someone who's going to through the same thing

josef2k13 · Aug 5, 2013, 06:25 PM

I am willing to talk about it but I'm not ready to say everything right now... I fell I need to think but I am attracted ro guys n girls but I think I like guys is, because I had sexual relationship n haven't done with a girl I think I will know after I do that

N0help4u · Aug 5, 2013, 06:35 PM

So you think you may be bi sexual and you think the solution is to have sex with each sex to determine?

josef2k13 · Aug 5, 2013, 07:06 PM

Yes I fell the only reason I like boys is that's the only sexual contact relationship I had

N0help4u · Aug 5, 2013, 07:12 PM

So you can see yourself actually getting into a serious sexual relationship with a girl and it not feeling weird to you?
Your title is misleading saying you are not gay. You are a girl that had sex with a boy or a boy that had sex with a boy?

Fr_Chuck · Aug 5, 2013, 07:30 PM

It is not the same poster, they were posted in different states in the US.

But advice is still good.

The issue first is that you are 14, and should not be anything sexual, You had a bad experience that forced sex upon you, but does not mean you have to be sexually active. 14 year old girls are not ready for sex, nor are you.

Wait, and then when older, if you have desires for either, go for it and see what you like. Perhaps you like boys, perhaps you like girls, perhaps you like both. That will be your choice.

What others think does not matter.

josef2k13 · Aug 6, 2013, 01:03 AM

Yes of course I'm not thinking of having sexual relationships with anybody till I fell ready

N just wanted to say thanks for everyone who commented on this it was a big help