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    Ronel Roux's Avatar
    Ronel Roux Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 13, 2013, 10:49 PM
    In love with someone else's boyfriend.
    Good day all,

    I have a huge problem and really donīt know what to do, maybe someone out there can help me.

    I have a boyfriend, we are serious about each other, its almost a year and 3 months know. But my cousin (adopted one) has a boyfriend, or actually they are engaged. Me and this guy liked each other even before I start dating my boyfriend. We chat a bit here and there in the beginning, and when we realized we liked each other we both tried to stop it, but then we started talking again (he invited me after seeing me at her house).

    Months went by that we didn't spoke in between the chats now and then but the last few months is so hard, we chat ever day. He wants to be with me so bad, and I really like him a lot, so you me too! But I can't do this to my boyfriend, he is struggling with the same, he cannot do it to her. What can I do?

    We really did try to stop it, a few times. We even had fight because of everything. I am so confused.

    Please help!

    Thanks
    smkanand's Avatar
    smkanand Posts: 602, Reputation: 56
    Senior Member
    		  
    #2

    Jun 13, 2013, 11:58 PM
    Set your priority. Boyfriend or the other guy. If this guy can't leave your cousin then why are you troubling.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Jun 14, 2013, 12:47 AM
    No you did not try, if you did, then you would have stopped contact.

    What if this was your boyfriend, doing this to you. This is called CHEATING

    So you break up with your boyfreind, and he breaks up with girl friend and you be with each other till he finds another girl to leave you for
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
    Uber Member
    		  
    #4

    Jun 14, 2013, 07:10 AM
    You are cheating and living a lie.

    Why don't you ask your boyfriend what he would do if he were in your situation, and then you do whatever he recommends.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    Jun 14, 2013, 08:14 AM
    Leave each other alone and stay within the boundaries of good behavior. Stop teasing yourselves behind your partners back. That's cheating, AND lying having this secret lust talk with each other.

    This isn't innocent chatting, its plotting and distracts you from doing the right thing, and its easier to just do it because it feels good. Lust always does, but at a price. You tried to do the right thing but quit because it was to hard.

    Try harder. Or be a liar and cheater still, and you can't think that's better for you, can you?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
    Uber Member
    		  
    #6

    Jun 14, 2013, 08:56 AM
    I see the OP losing her boyfriend, her cousin - and half her family over this.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Jun 14, 2013, 09:21 AM
    If she doesn't change her behavior, she will learn the hard way.
    nourirannii's Avatar
    nourirannii Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Jun 14, 2013, 10:55 AM
    Why would you do such a thing? And saying that you tried your best... no you didn't. If you did, you wouldn't have contact with him and did what's right which is telling him you have a boyfriend. That's cheating and I know that you wouldn't like it to happen to you.

    All the best.
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