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budzifam · Mar 21, 2007, 08:12 PM

I have a 13 year old daughter who is causing my family so much stress. Yes, I know this comes with the teen years, but this is more than normal and her father just encourages it. I have another daughter and son with him as well. I am remarried and have two sons with my current husband and my ex is remarried to his sister in law and has two step sons and a bio daughter with her. My daughter has expressed her desires to live with her dad since she was six or so years old.We tried it once, and she begged to come back. Then she just got so out of control that I begged him to take her back. After this past summer, he begged me to let her finish school out by me so she did not get teased that her step brother's were also her bio cousins, so I agreed. Well, she is more out of control and in more trouble than ever before. He is picking her up tomorrow and she will be moving to Missouri with him. Actually, he is having me sign over full custody to him so he can legally sign his inlaws as guardians until he moves out there, that way she can get back to school more quick. He sees her as this perfect child who never does anything wrong or ever lies. She is such a trouble maker. I have even had the police called on me for stupid reasons and they always say it is a civil matter and leave. That is not the point. I don't need my other four children seeing all this go on. I want to sign over my parental rights so she can be adopted by her step mother. What forms do I need to fill out and sign to do this? I just can not take another day of this. I know I sound like the worst mom in the world but it is so hard to understand unless you live it yourself. It is so bad. Worse than I could ever describe in one sitting. I hate saying this, but it is like I want to do this so I feel free of her as a daughter. I hate feeling that way, but can't help it either. Don't get me wrong, I do love her, but I also love my neighbor and her family. It is not like a mother should be with a daughter and it is all done by her and her father. They both won. I just want to finalize all of it now.:confused: :mad: :eek: :(

Thank you
Mi

ATYOURSERVICE · Mar 21, 2007, 11:09 PM

Lol... sorry, your daughter needs counseling. She probably feels completely confused that her mother and father divorced, remarried, had children with other people, one who is the child of her dad and his ex sister in law. Just listen to your story. This is WAY more than teenage stuff, sorry, need to be blunt here... She is not the only one with problems.
By the way, she is your daughter forever.
Good luck.

davidnjulia · Mar 26, 2007, 09:25 AM

I understand this completey. I have a 13 yr old daughter too. She has listened to her father tell her that making her do the dishes and help clean is child abuse. My ex does not support me in any punishments that my kids deserve for their behavior. I also have an 11 yr old by him also. My oldest has called me every name in the book because she didn't get what she wanted. On top of that her father takes her to goodwill to shop. Which I guess is OK to some people but I grew up with 5 other siblings and I'm the baby. I always got used clothes and never new. I have always bought everything new for my kids. I took my daughters to payless shoes to get them new shoes. My oldest got mad because she didn't want shoes there. She wanted 65.00 pair of shoes from famous footwear. Well I can't afford that. But she will not ask her father to do it. So please just sit your daughter down and talk to her. I know it is hard but I wouldn't give up on my daughters ever, because I know they would not be better off with him. I am looking out for their futures not my interest. It is hard to have patience I know. I'm there. If you need to talk some more feel free to contact me.

Julia

ScottGem · Mar 26, 2007, 09:50 AM

This has to be initiated by the father. If he and the step mom want to adopt her, they need to file a petition to the court. As part of that petition you will be given a form to sign relinquishing your rights.

There is nothing you can do until they take that step. But I urge you to really think this through. If the daughter is a problem now, think about what the rejection of being abandoned by a parent would do.