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    ijustlovehim's Avatar
    ijustlovehim Posts: 17, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 31, 2013, 08:56 PM
    A Secret Love.
    I had a baby in 1998 but did not stay with my child’s father. I married in 2005 and had another child but just got divorce November 2012. Well I started talking on FB with my first child older brother and he never met my child because since he has a different mom we never knew them. Turns out he comes to visit for about 2 weeks but my child was in NY visiting my sister so they didn't actually meet until the last few days of his visit.

    Well to make this short I wind up sleeping with my child’s father’s brother and fall crazy in love with him in just that short time. He left and we have been talking back and forth ever since. We decided because we love each other so much and I don't want to hurt my child or anyone else we will have a secret relationship. Do you think I'm crazy? Or should I follow my heart because love is not easy to find.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #2

    Mar 31, 2013, 09:07 PM
    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/just-wanted-help-him-741238.html

    Is that the same person?
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Mar 31, 2013, 11:38 PM
    Yes I think this is crazy, it is your ex husbands or lovers son, basically a step son if you had stayed together.

    Next nothing you have to keep secret can be good
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #4

    Mar 31, 2013, 11:39 PM
    My question is... Is it a half-brother of the OPs son? Or is it the ex-brother-in-law?

    Both of your posts contradict each other.
    smkanand's Avatar
    smkanand Posts: 602, Reputation: 56
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    #5

    Apr 1, 2013, 12:39 AM
    Yes your last post said something else, I thought he is your husbands brother. I'm confused.
    I wined up sleeping with my child's brother... I don't understand what is going on?
    ijustlovehim's Avatar
    ijustlovehim Posts: 17, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Apr 1, 2013, 05:14 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    Yes I think this is crazy, it is your ex husbands or lovers son, basicly a step son if you had stayed together.

    Next nothing you have to keep secret can be good
    this is true except I never married him and left him when the baby was 2 months. Made a lot of mistakes including thus one and sorry for not telling the real
    Sorry. I was afraid to hear what people will say but I guess the truth always sets you free

    Quote Originally Posted by smkanand View Post
    yes your last post said something else, I thought he is your husbands brother. I'm confused.
    i wined up sleeping with my child's brother .........I don't understand what is going on?
    Sorry to confuse things. I myself am very confused but this is the real sorry so I confess. I never got to meet his son and neither of them was in my child's life and we are in love so what now I just forget him and be broken hearted. Im so messed up. Just need some advice so I can finally make a decision that won't ruin my reputation. Thanks
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #7

    Apr 1, 2013, 05:15 AM
    It is wrong on too many levels, the fact you are ashamed and want to keep it a secret should be a big clue
    ijustlovehim's Avatar
    ijustlovehim Posts: 17, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Apr 1, 2013, 05:18 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    My question is... Is it a half-brother of the OPs son? Or is it the ex-brother-in-law?

    Both of your posts contradict each other.
    Yes my child and him are half brothers.

    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    It is wrong on too many levels, the fact you are ashamed and want to keep it a secret should be a big clue
    Yes but what if you fell in love with tge wrong girl meaning that you weren't suppose to. Its not fair!! I find the one and now we can't be together. Im not ashamed for other people to know just my child. My child will find a woman a move out get married and I will be miserable and grow old Alone!! Great!! I guess if some are really against it they'll say serves you right! Its okay people I will figure it out somehow.
    Cat1864's Avatar
    Cat1864 Posts: 8,007, Reputation: 3687
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    #9

    Apr 1, 2013, 05:39 AM
    If I accept this thread as the truth, I have a couple of background questions:

    1. If your child is 15, how old is his sibling?

    2. Were your other three children (you mention in another post answering a pregnancy question that you have had four children) at home or with the oldest when the half-brother visited?
    ijustlovehim's Avatar
    ijustlovehim Posts: 17, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Apr 1, 2013, 09:41 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Cat1864 View Post
    If I accept this thread as the truth, I have a couple of background questions:

    1. If your child is 15, how old is his sibling?

    2. Were your other three children (you mention in another post answering a pregnancy question that you have had four children) at home or with the oldest when the half-brother visited?
    He's 24 and I do have 4 children but only my 15 year old son and my 9 year old son who is Autistic but he's not very social. My oldest child is 20 and is on her own in college and working. She is doing well.My youngest child lives with her father who I divorced. I moved out in June

    In the other post,just telling a young girl about pregnancy based on my own experience.
    Zea's Avatar
    Zea Posts: 217, Reputation: 19
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    #11

    Apr 1, 2013, 04:51 PM
    I think you are crazy for love; a combination of two.

    Your story is complicated. I think that you should have made it simpler for everyone to understand.

    Now, I don't think that this relationship is a real one; you talked with the guy for few weeks, how could you rush your feelings? Don't assume this can work fast. Do you even know what kind of person he really is? Well, you certainly can't find out everything about him, within few weeks; everyone keeps their own secrets. Of course, when you meet someone for the first time, they are fresh in your mind. But time only decides if they will leave the same impression on you every time you see them or not.

    Lastly, you are keeping this a secret, because you know it is wrong. And you can make friends, or find a new person, if you don't want to be alone.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #12

    Apr 1, 2013, 05:07 PM
    It was a difficult circumstance when we thought you were dating your ex's brother.

    Dating your sons half brother makes things a lot clearer. This is wrong, and you should run away from this relationship. He's too young for you, and he's your sons blood! There is so much wrong with this I don't even know where to begin.
    ijustlovehim's Avatar
    ijustlovehim Posts: 17, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Apr 1, 2013, 07:08 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Alty View Post
    It was a difficult circumstance when we thought you were dating your ex's brother.

    Dating your sons half brother makes things a lot clearer. This is wrong, and you should run away from this relationship. He's too young for you, and he's your sons blood! There is so much wrong with this I don't even know where to begin.
    I guess you would say that. I was expecting this anyway. I always choose the wrong guy. Thanks for help

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