[wilkins_rose]

Assalaam o Alaikum. I am a 25 year old woman. I recently got a marrige proposal but the boy's family says that in addition to what every parents give to their daughter i.e. all the electronics items and furniture etc. they want a car also. I am pretty confused with their demand because being born and brought up in muslim family I have always known that giving and taking dowry is strictly prohibited in islam. That is the reason why I don't feel like saying yes to this proposal. Please tell me whether I am right or not? I don't want to commit any sin by getting involved in such an unislamic practice.

[smkanand]

Well, marriage in islam is an kind of agreement. A religious agreement, I guess. The boy supposed to give you(bride) a certain amount of money called mehar. This amount will given to the girl if the marriage does not work out. I think all this car issue is nothing but greedy family who wants more and more. Your parents already giving too much. So you should not marry someone who is greedy and puts money before relationship. This is not only against Islam but against any ethics, against the whole ideas of marriage. Decision is yours but I would say don't marry such guy who is marrying you for a car. There is another way your parents can ask to rise amount of mehar if they are giving car to the guy. But still this is not love!

[joypulv]

Do your parents know about this? I assume that they would be paying for anything extra, and I doubt that they will want to. So they can answer the boy's parents.

We have been hearing stories here of families making new demands at the wedding!
Also stories of parents making ongoing demands for money after the marriage.
So be careful, and find out all you can about someone you don't know really well.