[LostanConfused]

So after 4 1/2 yrs and being engaged, me and my ex girlfriend (we're a gay couple), decided to break up. The next day she told me she wants to work things out. That was in December '12. So fairly recently. We were living together in an apt with roomies. Things were OK, she has ptsd so sometimes she does have angry outbursts without someone or anything in particular triggering an episode. I decided that moving back to my hometown from the area we were living at was best for my mental and emotional health as I wanted to be with supportive friends and family during this time, and our roomies were stirring up trouble between us. She agreed me coming home was a great idea as well as she could see how unhappy I was. So I left 2 weeks ago. Since I have been home she rarely communicates, only texts me after work to complain about the roomies (they are HORRIBLE roomies for various reasons). I can keep a normal conversation but it seems like she can't. She complains and then conversation on her end drys up. She never texts on the wknds. And when I try to ask her what she's up to or how her day went, she gets defensive and angry. She isn't dating anyone (I have confirmation on that), and she keeps making rude comments over the fact that I have been hanging with my friends a lot since I've been back. She was suppose to visit this wknd, but I just found out she can't as she had to send her mom money (her mom had a nasty car accident and broke her neck and needs help, and she is from out of state). She keeps getting upset and saying we are done, I say OK, and then later on she acts like we are fine and when I ask if we are done or working things out still she avoids the question. I am just looking for advice on what to do, I did tell her that if we are working things out she needs to communicate with me, I know that we are not together, but we are working it out and rebuilding our friendship first. I understand she has a lot of mental and emotional problems, and she is seeking help, but I am just frustrated that she doesn't seem to get it. Any serious advice is appreciated.

[joypulv]

You are the one who moved away. To my mind that means you don't get to complain about how you 'rebuild your friendship.' In fact, statistics show that people rarely stay in a close intimate relationship long distance. Plus, she is probably not in a chatty mood after work and a house full of difficult roomies while you have old friends who aren't difficult. And on top of all that, you are complaining about her not visiting you but why haven't you made plans to visit her?
So either go back and get your own apartment together or with different roomies (not easy, I know), or accept what is going on with a little more equanimity.