[ftmtired]

A few months ago we went round to my husbands brother and sister in laws house for dinner. As we were leaving his brother came out and started shouting at me calling me horrid names, that I'm jealous of them, swearing, how much they hate me, I'm splitting the family up, really horrible stuff. He was pointing at me being really nasty. My husband was telling him to so it and how dare he but his brother just then kept asking my husband to hit him! My husband didn't give him the satisfaction but nowadays I think he regrets that, and should have. Since then my mother in law keeps trying to get my husband to make up with his brother despite being told what he had done! I can't believe it. As is it's not bad enough being told all those nasty things (which couldn't be further from the truth) but I feel like his mum doesn't care and thinks it's nothing. My husband is completely on my side but I'm so angry that it is being made to look look like we are in the wrong, I wish they could have been there that night to see for themselves how nasty he was. Last night we went to his mums with our 5 month old baby (they have only seen him 5 times, unlike their other grandchild, his daughter, they see all the time), again she brought it up. I couldn't help but react this time and told her how hurt I am that she is disregarding how he has hurt me and how disgusting he was. My husband was also telling. She just isn't listening though! I don't know what to do anymore, looks like husband us going to lose his parents over this too and yet it's again nothing that we have done. My husband and I have always been hard workers, saving for holidays and stuff and they have always felt we should treat them with or money but we're not rich! We just worked hard for what we wanted. We now have a baby and are far from well off so not able to afford much for xmas presents and I know we Will be getting comments like oh is that it, we wish we hadn't got you much either! We are meant to go round his parents next week and I can't face going! Not after all this, we tried staying on touch with hid parents but they aren't respecting our feelings in that we don't want to see or hear of his horrible brother. I'd love to hear what your thoughts are.

[Fr_Chuck]

Not sure why you went to his parents, knowing how it was, but stop going, don't talk to them, don't go to their home. My mother had a issue with my wife, and I did not speak or see her for three years till she was ready to say she was sorry.

Time just understand that some people will not like you.

But honestly to end up yelling and almost a fight ( never hit someone, he would be in jail now) something had to have happened to set it off

[ftmtired]

What started it off apparently was that I didn't seem kiss his wife on the way out, but that's not something unusual, seemed he was waiting for an excuse to start saying all that he hates about me. I understand that not everybody lies one another that's fine, but I wouldn't dream of being that nasty. I wish we hasn't gone to his mums and your right in that we shouldn't go again, I hope my husband makes a stand this time to show he is being serious about It

[joypulv]

Not kiss his wife? Not good enough Christmas presents?
UGH, who needs that kind of family. What is the cultural background, where so much importance is attached to kissing goodbye?
Let them know you aren't going there for Christmas this year, and will see them once a year in the summer, no gifts or strings attached.