[Wondergirl]

[Please leave comments, if you wish.]

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I ask myself that a lot. I often think I would like to feel normal for 5 minutes just so I can see what that feels like. What does that really mean? The norm is just like a statistical average. It doesn't imply anything good. The normal IQ is between 90 and 110, so an IQ of over 110 is statistically "abnormal". Psychologists rather use the term "maladaptive". If a thought or behavior inhibits your ability to adapt to your environment, then it needs to change or life becomes a struggle.

I've been struggling for as long as I can remember because of maladaptive thoughts and behavior. I have feelings of inferiority and though I'm not antisocial, anxiety prevents me from reaching out and connecting to people. I know this must change and I'm glad I found this site because there is someone who will push me to change. It's all about confronting your fears, challenging those thoughts in your head that hold you down, and coming out of the shadow and feeling the light. One day I hope to look back and realize I was normal all along and just didn't realize it. As Pogo said:

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[777666]

As a converted shy and introvert and abnormal victim, I got tired of feeling left out and missing all the fun, feeling so different. So, for me the problem was fear of rejection, embarrassment, social separation, etc. I knew there were people out there who were like me, good people, compatible, with same situation, but all of us suffered the same introverted problem and thus were doomed to never find each other and live the fuller life of real human connection. And if we could just find each other (friends, romances), then we'd connect and life would ramp up. So I just kept my fear in check and threw myself out there everywhere I went, sought out venues, groups, social circles where I thought like minded people congregated, and eventually found a rich group of friends and human connections that keep growing. Every day is filled with enormous social failures but that's OK now as I see it as a journey to seek out the rare few gems in a sea of possible people. I don't need a lot of people, so finding the 10 new ones per year takes many attempts, but is feeling natural and getting easier every day now that there is foundation of a great group. For me, human connection, meaningful connection, has opened my life to endless peace, acceptance, beauty, fun and romance. They were out there, I just need to get in the game and stop holding myself back. Normal or not, there were others just like me and now we can be abnormal together, which now serenely feels like "our" normal.

[Raiderman]

Was there a particular internet site (assuming you used the internet) that helped you make these connections? I know there is a meetup group for people with social anxiety but, not surprisingly, few show up for the meetings. Thanks for a thoughtful reply.