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How to relax during sex/ get rid of psychological block?
I have a problem that just keeps getting worse and worse. My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half with some break ups in between. He has never been able to get me to orgasm... ever. I was a virgin before I met him and when I didn't orgasm the first couple times from clitoral stimulation, I figured that was normal because it was my first time and I was new and uncomfortable. But now it's been that long and nothing has happened. This is putting a strain on our relationship (without this problem, we would be great!)... he feels inadequate because he can't get me to orgasm and that has actually started to affect him orgasming... plus I almost never get wet anymore which makes sex uncomfortable for him. And he gets mad now because I can orgasm with my vibrator but he can't make me at all. So we basically have stopped having sex all together. This sucks! I want to have a good sex life and I want to have it with him so badly but I don't know what to do anymore. I'm trying to find something that can help me relax because I think part of the problem is I never got comfortable enough to express what I like and what feels good... I am a highly anxious person so I believe this is the problem... I can't get past whatever psychological block I have. I just want to fix this so we can be happy! HELP PLEASE!
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The startling truth is that most women don't orgasm from intercourse. It does happen, don't get me wrong, but the number of times you will have orgasm from penetration will be small compared to the times you don't.
Your boyfriend needs to relax a little. It is honestly the journey not the destination. Have you considered using the vibrator during sex? It is actually a lot of fun. Concentrate on the feelings you get from having sex and not the build up to orgasm. You can get him to get you off with the vibrator before he penetrates you. There are a lot of options for play before hand too. Also. Lube. Use it. Love it. It's your friend. Take some pressure off your boyfriend. Let him know it is okay if you don't orgasm. |
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