[nkessler]

My situation is unique I think. My daugter's father is court ordered to pay child support in the amount of $461/month. My daughter lives with me and spends (0) days with her father.
Just recently, he went on SSDI and he applied for benefits for our daughter. She receives $567/month but since she is a minor, it comes to me (her mother).
I also received a $6000 retro active payment taking us back to July 2011 when he first became disabled.
I use this money for her private school tuition and have some saved for her college since she is a junior in high school.

Her father stopped paying child support in June of 2012 and has told me that he found out that since our daughter is receiving Social Security benefits, he does not have to pay child support-(which I am fine with).

My question: will I have to make back payments to him because of the retro active payment given to me? (He was making child support payments up until June of 2012). I am under the impression you can't collect both. It has to be one or the other. Also, just as a note, I forgave him arrears of 13 years of not paying child support. Will this help me if I bring it up in court? (Literally, he didn't pay child support for the 1st 13 years of her life-but I said he didn't have to pay the arrears).

[joypulv]

I found a case in NJ whereby the court ordered the overlapping amounts paid by the spouse to be applied to arrears. Did you tell him you forgave it verbally or in writing? It would make sense to want to keep it for 13 years of not getting a dime.