[FailureToMunch]

Title says it all
She began being very distant and defensive about 5 months ago; she also became more aggressive and argumentative when I would literally try to calmly defuse a situation. I am not a confrontational guy and I pride myself in being a gentleman above all.

On top of all of this my girlfriend began to refuse any kind of affectionate gestures, she refuses to having another love interest and seems to be unaffected by the route the relationship takes, not to mention my girlfriend pretty much refuses to do any of the things listed in the title; we've been dating for 2 years now and it's gotten worse and worse to the point now where she has vanished and speaks to me rarely.

I am 25 and I am a VERY shy person, my girlfriend is 26 and she is somewhat outgoing and above all verbose, if there is a problem she isn't one to keep it to herself which has been both helpful and refreshing; when it comes to our private life I don't usually try to initiate anything anymore because she use to shoot me down when I asked before which wasn't really all that often, maybe once a week and in all honesty my self-esteem can't take that kind of beat down she tells me what a good looking guy I am and how she loves my long hair and above all my physical up keep but it seems like she is just telling me what I want to hear.

We lived together for a while but she moved in with her mother, there was no altercation of any kind she just kind of sneakily did it, I never had a problem with her leaving and I let her know that she is free to do as she pleased and I supported it 100%. Originally she said she was simply safeguarding her items which she kept in her mother's house and I understood, I never pushed for her to move in with me at all so any choice she made was fine but after the move she never returned, she migrated with her belongings.

Now that she is living with her mother .she use to come by to use my internet for whatever she needed but after she acquired her own, she's gone. She calls me rarely, never visits ( literally NEVER it's been over a 2 months now that she has had her service up and she has not ONCE come by) when I asked her when I can see her I got an extremely hostile response “ whenever I get to it, OK! Now stop asking” mind you I never asked before that conversation, I believe I asked once during the entire time she's vanished.

When she use to call (last call was two weeks ago exactly, not give or take, not mid-week, EXACTLY 14 days ago not counting her announcement to come over tomorrow for me to fix her computer.) was rushed and was to ask about a problem she was having with an art project (I'm an artist) and her computer acting up. When she didn't hear what she wanted (which was that I am unable to A: help with an art project I cannot see B: fix a computer over the phone) she hung up on me very rushed. After the phone call she went dark again and I've tried contacting her once, her mother picked up and I never got a call back from her.

When I asked her what was going on prior to her last call during a Skype conversation she let me know that her mother has forbade her to speak or see me, which I find odd seeing as we've been dating for 2 years, her mother and I never got along but by no fault of my own; I treated her with respect and courtesy. I cannot wrap my head around why a 26 year old would obey a rule to stay in a home if the rule is putting her in a situation she isn't comfortable with.

This has lead me to the conclusion that the relationship is over by means of her skulking away and only speaking to me when she is in need of my “services”. I am also starting to think there is someone else but I don't want to move on until I am sure she is either cheating or simply keeping me around to make herself feel better and to get what she needs from me instead of paying for professional services. I seriously want to believe that I am wrong but so far she's been acting like I'm a hired hand and only speaks to me when she is in need of something. It also doesn't make any sense why she would use her mother as an excuse to not see me for months at a time and avoid speaking to me for weeks at a time. I have given the waiting game a fair shot and am officially fed up. I understand people are busy but I have deadlines too, close deadlines and I make time for everyone I care for, which can be a choir at times but isn't that what you do when you love someone? I doubt that hiding from someone for so long can be considered anything but ex-remorse.

I need some second opinions, un-bias second opinions.

I realize some people are going to make my speech seem like I am a mechanical affection hogging monster that only thinks of himself but I've no intention of having her draped around me all day every day, a phone call once in a while would be fine. A visit even if it's once a month would have been okay. But that's not going to happen, speaking to her gets hostile results so I cannot sit her down and have a “things need to change” or a “what's going on in your life?” talk because I tried and they blew up in my face, big time and I always compliment her without being too clingy, I've always treated her so well so I don't understand why its come to such an extreme.

[Homegirl 50]

Why are you still dealing with her? She moved out without telling you, she has not talked to you for two weeks and she is nasty when she does. Get a clue guy, this girl is gone and if she is not, you should be.
I would not contact her anymore.

[FailureToMunch]

All right I guess that I will just walk away, it will be hard though.. . But thank you for answering. Guess I should have seen as much but I loved her so that probably blinded me to the truth of the situation.

[Fr_Chuck]

She already walked away, you don't have to, you just have to realise it. It can't be hard, she is not talking to you anyway.

It can be hard, but at times you just have to move on.

[cheekygirly2011]

Doesn't sound like you both are still in a relationship. If you love and still want to try then call her up and tell her you two need to sit down and have a talk. Ask her what she wants, and tell her what you want. It could be something that you're doing wrong that is annoying her or she could just be acting like that because she basically doesn't want to be with you anymore. Whatever it is, you both need to sit down and have a talk so that you both know where you stand rather than you feeling like this and her just... I don't know... acting up so to say.