[mota_steph]

He makes me very happy and content. I'm a college student and he is in the Army. He brings my life with such joy and happiness. Crazy thing he is 6 years older than both my parents.

My parents don't disagree they say do what makes me happy, but I get so much negative feedback from people, co workers, and friends.
They always say it won't work it won't last that's gross.

I'm just wondering what people that I don't know or don't know me think about my relationship or their advices or if they think it will or won't last?

[talaniman]

How long have you been dating?

[mota_steph]

We've been dating for a 1year ;]

[talaniman]

Things are probably great now but keep your eyes open because I suspect you have more to learn after the honeymoon period is over. I doubt anyone will understand this relationship,so don't count on them too.

I think a year is a bit soon to know if this is a life time thing. Relax and enjoy getting to know each other.

Good Luck.

[joypulv]

Whether it will last or not will depend on factors we can't possibly know about, and of course, no one, not even the two of you, really know. But you do need to find out what he wants in the long term (5 years, 10 years) and ask yourself how it jibes with what you want. The main question is children - it's amazing how many older men with grown children are shocked to discover that their young girlfriend is expecting to start a family.

Or, maybe you just like the idea of him as a boyfriend without thinking that far ahead? I shouldn't presume.

[backpack2389]

When you say "will it work?" do you mean permanently? 51 is by no means old, but he will get there when you're still fairly young. With this age difference you'll very likely encounter issues with sexual compatibility, overall energy level, life goals (he's already accomplished much of what you won't encounter for years), finding a social niche, etc. A friend of mine's parents are 12 years apart, a much smaller difference than what you're facing. This age gap is very hard on their relationship. He's the older one at 70 and has faced some common issues associated with aging while she is still very much in good health at 58. He wants to slow down while she's still ready to go. They can't take trips together because he can't travel much. They have young grandchildren that he can't play with and that breaks her heart. He will likely die long before she does, especially when you combine age gap with differences in life expectancy for men and women. These are all considerations, along with the 'children' question joypulv mentioned that you need to weigh.

[Fr_Chuck]

Will it work, most likely not, but it is your choice.

At 51 and you are 20, he is still fairly active.

At 61 and you are 30, he will be slowing down some but should still be OK.

At 71 ( if he lives that long) and you will be 40, things will start to change and you will be more of a care giver than a wife or girlfriend.

At 81 and 40?

Most likely you will be widowed somewhere between 40 and 50 and will be alone to either be a widow for years or consider remarriage

[Alty]

For anyone over the age of 21 I think age is just a number. I know couples that have a 30 year age difference and are madly in love and doing just fine.

But, those couples don't care what others think. You do.

Your parents are on your side, and tell you to do what you want with this man. The man is supportive, yet here you are, worried about what other people say.

So, will it last? I doubt it. You're not secure enough in this relationship to stop caring about what other people think. Because of that, it won't last. You can't just love him for him, and let him love you for you. You're worried about what others think. That's a recipe for disaster.

This won't last, you're not secure enough to let it last. Your fears about what other people think will be the end of this relationship.

[mota_steph]

Thank you. ;]

Things are probably great now but keep your eyes open because I suspect you have more to learn after the honeymoon period is over. I doubt anyone will understand this relationship,so don't count on them too.

I think a year is a bit soon to know if this is a life time thing. Relax and enjoy getting to know each other.

Good Luck.

[ArmstrongMiller]

Will it work, most likely not, but it is your choice.

At 51 and you are 20, he is still fairly active.

At 61 and you are 30, he will be slowing down some but should still be ok.

At 71 ( if he lives that long) and you will be 40, things will start to change and you will be more of a care giver than a wife or girlfriend.

At 81 and 40 ??

Most likely you will be widowed somewhere between 40 adn 50 and will be alone to either be a widow for years or consider remarriage

Good analysis.