[guy4enjoy]

I am an engineer graduate. I love one girl four years very very sincerely. But not proposing to her. In our final year tour all of our class mates went for tour. On that time I got a chance to speak with her because we were in the same bus. She voluntarily talking with me a lot and taken me with a few photographs. I am not expecting, she feel happy to speaking with me. On that day she enjoyed with me lot of fun. I got change to dance with her on the bus itself on that same day. I felt really very happy and felt I am the luckiest person in the moment.

A few months go by. We got placed in different software companies on the campus interview itself. One day she smiled at me and expressed "you are looking so cute" with her beautiful smile. Really I am not expecting such words from her. Really I was not sleeping on the day. I got many chance to propose her but I wasted those times. Because I got fear about whether there is possibility to rejecting my proposal. But only three month is there in my hand because after three months our BE graduation will be complete.

One day I got a chance and proposed her but she’s not accepting my love. She told "I am not interested in loving you because you not in my expectation level.” I ready to change myself for her expectation level and wanted her time to change myself. But she is not ready to waiting for me. I tried to prove myself a lot, but one day she scold me lot and told, "I do not love you anymore. I love someone else. If you follow me again this is waste of your time.” After that day she stopped to speaking with me.

I tried to speaking with her, but she didn’t allow me to speak to her. Now we were in different s/w companies. One year after I met her I still am unable to forget her. I tried to forget her and concentrate on my job but not able. Whenever I hearing her name, or seeing her photo or seeing her related friends or things I feel disturbed. And not able to concentrate with other activities. I have her contact number with me. But if I call her, she feels disturbed. I don’t like to disturb her because I like to keep her always happy but she always understanding me wrongly. So I am not contacting her and all but I am not able to forget her.

I discussed with my friends lot. They provide me more advices but no use. Please can anyone solve my problem? Now we both are 22 years old. I feel fear about whether I will became mental condition. I don't know why this one side love is more painful. Her memories occupy my mind fully. Please help me learn how to forget her and keep my mind as fresh.

[ahliya]

Listen dear I am almost in this situation but I am a girl

And I was in relation for the 1st time but now v broke up
The boy moved on so fast and have many relations but I cnt move on I feel I am a looser

But listen dear as I read your post and I want to help you
I feel everyone needs to be happy as I am sufrng badly

1st thng if the girl has tld you all this than you thnk in your mind that you shdnt care about her
I know its easy sayng but kiils yl doing
I do the same but it doesn't hellp

Trust me stp carng about that girl
Ccn I know whts your religion I will try to help you with a answer acrdng your religion

[talaniman]

Sorry for you disappointment over your proposal rejection and have heart. If you leave her alone completely for one and a half years of NO CONTACT, and focus on your job, and building a life that you enjoy, and are happy then those old memories will be replaced by new ones, and new friends and a lot of better options, and opportunities for happiness.

Its very hard to erase 4 years of attraction, and strong feelings, and you need a lot more time is all, so be patient, and don't quit yet.

Also read these stickies for some detailed suggestions on healing, rebuilding, and moving forward. They will help if you take the advice, and don't be discouraged. They can be found here

Good luck.

[Kahani Punjab]

Life goes on, even as such 'happenings' are part and parcel of life. Everyone is not lucky to get his/her love, at the first instances, and moreover- sweet are the fruits of adversity. Just live on, keep on trying, carry on with your lives, and sure, one day, you will meet one person at the turn of some corner, who will say, "Hey, I love you." For the time being, just relax and be busy in your work, studies or business. Time is a great healer and when you will meet your soulmate, all the bitter past will fade away. Good luck (to both above)!

[ahliya]

Thankx bth :)

Well my story is really difrnt it has being months but I just can't stp thnkng about him

While he's so happy he has many relations right now

Ihes so happy even I want my befores life
Please help me stp thnkng about him:'(

[guy4enjoy]

Hi ahliya,

Thank you for your answer..
I am in the religion of hindhu.. I can't get any reason to hating her.. because she has very good character... most of her friends helped my love.. still they ready to help.. but no use :( . Because she committed with someone.. I know there is no possibility to getting her.. but don't know why still I loving her.. her name is very very common in our india.. so I heard her name at least 10 times.. so in that situation I can't able to erase her memory... can you please provide some good idea to forgetting her... please :'(

And I have read your post.. itseems ur's boy friend is not an good person... your same situation happened with one of my clg friend. She loves one boy in her diploma itself.. he also love her.. days goes on.. he started to keep distance with her.. one she asked him why you keep distance with me.. but he didn't said any reason.. but she found her boyfriend some other girl.. he hurted so lot.. I don't know this things.. because I was not studied with her in diploma.. she cried everyday when she joined with our BE graduation.. her friends tried to make her happy... but no use... but she found one boy in the train... and got friendship with him.. this boy also one of the l;ove failured person.. he shared his love experience with her.. she also shared shared her love experience with her... now.. this love failured boy and girl cute lovers now.. the boy is 100% better than her deploma lover.. she is one of my best friend in my clg life... she share this things with me... so you no need to worry about such personality... they are not eligible to love any one of them... I hope surely you will get some other good guy who caring you lot... all the best

[ahliya]

Thankx @guy4enjoy :)

But I just can't stop thinking about him
He's has so many relation but y do I care :'(
Help me with this

[guy4enjoy]

Hi kahani.. thank you for your answer... I understood your thoughts and all... I know there is possibility to find one in any one of the situation... but is there any temporary solution is there for forgotting her now... can you please provide me some guidelines which helps me to make an move from her.. please..

[guy4enjoy]

Hi ahilya,

May I know your age ? So that I can explain you briefly...

[Homegirl 50]

Thankx @guy4enjoy :)

But I just can't stop thinking about him
He's has so many relation but y do I care :'(
Help me with this

Start your own thread. Don't ask your question on the back of this one and please don't write in text. It is not allowed and too hard to understand what you are saying.

[guy4enjoy]

Hi talniman..
One year overs when I left her contact... but still I am having her memories... because her name is very very common in our country india.. so daily I heard at least 10 times her name... still its reminds her memories.. I know in future any other things happen... but can you please provide me some guidelines to forgetting her temporarily and concentrating on my job.. please do me a favour on that... plzz.

[ahliya]

Hey guy4enjoy

I sented you private message

[guy4enjoy]

ahliya. I am not getting any message from you..

[ahliya]

Guy4enjoy
You sent me a private message yourself

Ok am waiting

[talaniman]

I get you, but let me ask you what else is going on in your life that's making focusing on your priorities so hard? I am NOT convinced this is old feelings that have never left, but after a year, you should have other things that crowd those reminders of her from your brain.

What's your social life like? It could well be that the time of year has affected your moods, or your strategy to cope with your feelings has a flaw you need to correct. Some details into your current routine out side of work will help me a lot, including some recent events that has brought you down.

Likely that's what I would be most interested in recent events in your social life. Been dating much? Made new friends, have you been exploring and experimenting with your options, and opportunities for FUN?

Happy people who are enjoying themselves move on with life much better than those that aren't.

[ahliya]

No am not happy
And that was my 1st dating
I am 16
And that was my first and last date
I just want to forget him

I hardly share my things but I am puring my heart here

Send me message if u can

[talaniman]

This isn't about you ahliya. Don't hijack his thread.

[guy4enjoy]

Hi taliniman,

Thanks for your post... I have lot of friends.. but some friends are still remind me her like "i have seen your girl friend in chennai.. she looking so cute.. and her boy friend also looking beauty like you.." I told them many times like "plzz don't be reminding her again.. its more hurting me... so plzz don't do this" but they not understanding my feelings and all.. they still doing like this.. so I stopped to mingle with them and stay alone allways.. but I hate this kind of life.. because I was an very jolliest person from my childhood before she rejecting my proposal.. but now all the things reversed... they volountarily provide me her contact address, ph.no and all.. I can't able to fully rejecting this... from that situation what I can do.. please guide me in right ways..

[mmresd]

She has told you how she feels about you. It is time to gather up some self-respect and move on, there is no point in following someone who is simply not interested in you. Like she said, it will be a waste of your time.

[talaniman]

Improve your environment by making new friends and doing things that you enjoy on your own. Expand your circle of friends and activities. I mean alone is a great way to be single and doesn't have to be about being lonely.

Learn to enjoy your own company, and treat YOURSELF very well. Look a stranger in the eye and say hello. Male, female, short, fat, ugly, tall doesn't matter. Never let others bring you down, friends or foes.