[59LesPaul]

So there's this girl that I'm close with, and she's brought up homecoming the last 2 times we hung out. (We are incoming Juniors) At first, I didn't think anything of it, but when I told a friend of mine, he flipped out and said she wants me to ask her to the dance! I guess I'd just like an outside opinion...

The first time, we were casually sitting in a group (me, her, and 3 of her female friends) and she mentioned needing a date to homecoming, because it'd be really awkward if her EX showed up with a date, and she didn't. I didn't think anything of this... If anything I felt like she wanted to go with anyone but me.

The second time, (within the same week) I was again hanging in a group with some of her female friends. We were having a bonfire, with some music playing, and they had brought up the fact that I was a dancer. The girl, then said that she should learn some stuff for homecoming, and she asked me to teach her some ballroom dancing. Next thing I knew, we were off to the side dancing together and I was teaching her a simple waltz.

Are these hints she wants me to ask her to the dance? (Its months away, and it seems unusual she'd bring it up twice in 1 week.) Or is she just "small-talking" it up with me like you would expect a girl to talk with her girlfriends?

Thanks

[Homegirl 50]

Who knows, it is months away. But her saying she needs a date because it would be weird having her ex show up with a date would turn me off. If she was hinting, she only wants to use you to make her ex jealous.
Do you want to take her?
What if you ask her now and later on she wants to go with someone else. I'd let her throw out her hints if that is what she is doing. She can ask you if she wants to be assured of a date so early on.

[Cat1864]

Is this the same girl as the one you asked about in this thread: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating...on-662270.html ?

How long has she been single?

If it is the same female, then she may be concerned about the ex or she may be trying to find out if she is in the 'friend zone' where you are concerned. You did help her get together with the ex.

If you aren't involved with anyone, is she someone you would want to go out with? Dance lessons seem like a good way for you both to get to know each other better.

[59LesPaul]

Who knows, it is months away. But her saying she needs a date because it would be weird having her ex show up with a date would turn me off. Of she was hinting, she only wants to use you to make her ex jealous.
Do you want to take her?
What if you ask her now and later on she wants to go with someone else. I'd let her throw out her hints if that is what she is doing. She can ask you if she wants to be assured of a date so early on.

Makes sense... I'm definitely not going to make any decisions too fast. We've always been close (texted alot), but we're hanging out more, and getting closer in person. I'm curious to see where this will go.

And the way she said it the first time, didn't seem she was implying she wanted a date only to make her ex jealous, she kind of just added that on the side. I don't know. I was just rather shocked with how my friend was so assertively positive she wanted me to ask her out.

And I'm always questioning it because I don't know how much she really likes me. (kinda impossible to know that unless I ask her). I mean we're close friends, but who knows if there's more. Certain things make me think there might be. For instance she doesn't refer to me as her "bestie" as she does some of her other guy friends (who I know are just friends). And at the bonfire the other night, twice, she gestured/asked me to sit next to her.

I even kind of tested her once.
The whole group of 11 of us were hanging at an old playground and I went off from the group and sat on the swings alone. (Just wanted to see if anyone specific came over to join me.) Sure enough, she walked over and we sat and chatted for 30 minutes or so, before we reached a stopping point in the conversation, and she asked if we should rejoin the group. (Which makes sense, it had been 30 minutes).

So I don't know... She was recently hurt pretty badly by her EX, and I really don't want to be the cause of more heartbreak in anyway. Just trying to figure out the best way to approach this... :)

Thanks for you time.

[59LesPaul]

Is this the same girl as the one you asked about in this thread: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating...on-662270.html ?

How long has she been single?

If it is the same female, then she may be concerned about the ex or she may be trying to find out if she is in the 'friend zone' where you are concerned. You did help her get together with the ex.

If you aren't involved with anyone, is she someone you would want to go out with? Dance lessons seem like a good way for you both to get to know each other better.

Yes it is the same girl.

She's been single for about a month and she was the one who ended it. Apparently he'd been emotionally abusive almost the whole time, was putting her off regularly, and flipped out when she ended it. But its really how it ended that hurt her most.

But like I said, I'm not taking this fast by any means. I'm letting her take the lead, and I'm trying to be careful not to pressure her into a relationship because I know how hurt she still is. I just do not want to risk hurting her like he did, if for some reason she really does like me, and would feel rejected if I didn't show her I liked her back. (And I don't want to miss my one chance.)

And yes, I would like to go out with her. She's a very sweet, wonderful girl, and I feel like we are rather close. I've been helping her through her breakup, and she said I've been her hero through all this.

But I'm not too concerned about getting to know her better, because I feel we know each other well enough to be in a relationship already. But the dance lessons is a good idea. I'll keep that in mind.

Thanks

[Wondergirl]

If she truly interests you, you don't want to be a rebound, so keep it cool for now. I too like the idea of the dance lesson. Teach her the Lindy and the Savoy too. And Disco.