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marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 08:04 AM

Past:
My ex girlfriend and I were eachother's first boyfriend and girlfriend. A week after out anniversary I stopped feeling it and I ended it, when she didn't want me to and she was heartbroken.

Ex's Solution:
She then spread rumors about me and I just ignored them because I figured that that would be here way over getting over me.

Present:
It is now 7 months later and for the past month I've been crushing on one of her friends, so for the past month I became one of her best friends and earned her trust as a friend. I recently asked her out and she said that she "doesn't want to hurt her friend anymore". She says that she still talks to my ex and that after 7 months she still isn't over me.

Problem:
The girl I am crushing on is asking me to wait a month ( by then summer is over and school is starting ) and THEN to ask her out if I still have the same feelings.

Bottom line:
HELP! The girl that told me to wait and I will probably not have the same relationship ever again unless another month blows by and my ex decides to text her "im over him". Is it not true that it always hurts and you feel even slightly jealous when seeing your ex with a friend? Even another person? What do I do?

Homegirl 50 · Jul 11, 2012, 10:06 AM

Don't go out with your ex's girl friend. That is tacky. It's tacky of her to even consider it.

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 10:56 AM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

Don't go out with your ex's girl friend. That is tacky. It's tacky of her to even consider it.

It is tacky to go out with someone that you like and that likes you back? Not going out with any of her friends means I don't go out with anyone because she was and still is popular. Again-- how is that tacky?

Homegirl 50 · Jul 11, 2012, 11:41 AM

Is the friend a best friend or just an acquaintance. It makes a difference if it is a best or close friend.
Going out with a best friend is just like going out with a sister. It is just tacky. There are some things you just don't do. Good friends don't do that to each other.
How would you feel if you ex that dumped you started dating your best friend?
But you guys are I'm assuming are High School and you do things totally different and change girl friends and boyfriends frequently.

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 12:58 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

Is the friend a best friend or just an acquaintance. It makes a difference if it is a best or close friend.
Going out with a best friend is just like going out with a sister. It is just tacky. There are some things you just don't do. Good friends don't do that to each other.
How would you feel if you ex that dumped you started dating your best friend?
But you guys are I'm assuming are High School and you do things totally different and change girl friends and boyfriends frequently.

They used to be good friends last year, and they never were best friends. I have one best friend and if they started going out I REALLY would not be bothered, maybe they were meant for each other? And good friends don't stand in the way of their friends dating an ex. They would be happy for them either way, no?

Homegirl 50 · Jul 11, 2012, 02:18 PM

I suggest you read some of these post and see the pain caused by exes who decided to date the best friend. But like I said you young guys fall in and out of love, and get a new one so fast that I don't suppose it matters.
I don't understand the whole wait a month thing. The girl either likes you or she doesn't.

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 04:29 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

I suggest you read some of these post and see the pain caused by exes who decided to date the best friend. But like I said you young guys fall in and out of love, and get a new one so fast that I don't suppose it matters.
I don't understand the whole wait a month thing. The girl either likes you or she doesn't.

She wants to wait a month in hopes that by month 8 my ex will be less, traumatized you could say. I don't understand it either, and by my understanding she will give the relationship a try after a full month of me act

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 04:30 PM

Originally Posted by marcusaurelius1

She wants to wait a month in hopes that by month 8 my ex will be less, traumatized you could say. I don't understand it either, and by my understanding she will give the relationship a try after a full month of me actually asking her out

:/ typo'd

Homegirl 50 · Jul 11, 2012, 05:04 PM

I think that is a load of crap! You ask someone out and they say "wait a month to see if your ex has gotten over you" after 7 months. And you are going to wait? I wouldn't. Move on to the next person who would not say wait.

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 05:26 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

I think that is a load of crap! You ask someone our and they say "wait a month to see if your ex has gotten over you" after 7 months. And you are going to wait? I wouldn't. Move on to the next person who would not say wait.

That's my point, I really like her, and I guess since its summer I don't have any contact with most people but one person, and she isn't back until the last 2 days. I don't want to have to wait and its embarrassing when I can't do anything BUT wait! Such bs :/

Homegirl 50 · Jul 11, 2012, 05:47 PM

Why do you have to wait? You may meet someone, even if you don't, why do you have to wait for her?

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 05:53 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

Why do you have to wait? You may meet someone, even if you don't, why do you have to wait for her?

I'm not specifically waiting for her, but I have only one good friend and its summer so we only hang out together really. The only thing to do is to wait out summer is what I'm saying. It feels like I'm being toyed with n

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 05:55 PM

Originally Posted by marcusaurelius1

I'm not specifically waiting for her, but i have only one good friend and its summer so we only hang out together really. the only thing to do is to wait out summer is what im saying. it feels like im being toyed with n

now and it sucks. Easy example is we'll be texting and randomly she'll stop. She has one of the "read receipts" on so I know when she reads it ( normally right after sent ) and I know she doesn't care enough to respond. This sucks...

Homegirl 50 · Jul 11, 2012, 06:02 PM

Stop texting her. You are an option to her. Don't let her play you like that.

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 06:12 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

Stop texting her. You are an option to her. Don't let her play you like that.

I guess so, thank you :)

Homegirl 50 · Jul 11, 2012, 07:47 PM

You're welcome.
I wish you well.

adviseplease11 · Jul 11, 2012, 08:28 PM

No matter how much a girl hates her ex whether he was good to her or not... there was always be some sort of connection there for her and she well still get jealous.. its just how us girls are wired up.. don't go out with her friend. Your only putting yourself in an awkward situation for you and your ex

marcusaurelius1 · Jul 11, 2012, 11:55 PM

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

You're welcome.
I wish you well.

Im sorry but one more question-- by you saying not to text her, do u mean don't text her first or don't text her all-in-all?

Homegirl 50 · Jul 12, 2012, 06:57 AM

Well for sure don't text her first.
I would not text her at all. You can be busy if she decides she wants to suddenly talk to you.

louise1928 · Jul 14, 2012, 08:39 AM

If you respect her wait for her. If your ex was a true friend to the girl you like she would be happy for her and tell her it was okay but your ex isn't that great so at the same time when the girl your crushing on is trying not to hurt her friend her friend is hurting her by not accepting it.