[johnelway]

Hi I am a 40 year old woman single mom of 5 kids. A few years ago I left my kids father we were never married for a great guy. He brought in all my kids. We live with him in his house but my 19 year old daughter recently moved her 21 year old boyfriend in with us. It was supposed to be temporary but it has turned into permanently. They won't work but just started looking for jobs.

Since then my boyfriend of 4 years has been emotionally abusive because of all the stress. He wants to kick my daughter and her boyfriend out. We had to recently call the police which got them looking for jobs.

Should I leave my boyfriend? We were engaged but he broke off the engagement. I just don't have the nerve to kick my daughter out of our house.

I am the sole provider but I have 4 other kids to take care of. They have no car so I have to take them everywhere. They both were working but got fired on the same day. What should I do?

[talaniman]

You mean your boyfriend doesn't work? While I give him credit for taking you and your tribe in, that's no excuse for emotional abuse, stress or not. The ideal thing would be to come up with boundaries and rules of what's proper, and fair, during these stressful times, and that goes for you too.

You may be frustrating him by coddling your own kids too much. Are you? Is the baby daddy helping his own kids as much as you, or at all? Why are you the sole provider for 7 people? At least 3 being adults besides yourself. What's wrong with that picture?

Families during tough times need to co operate and work together, and the head of the household has to be the one to guide, and set the rules,and enforce them.

Seems that job is yours, like it or not. Guide your household, and all who cannot contribute, have to go!

[rbdrbd]

Why doesn't your daughters boyfriend get cash assistance? If he qualify's then they help him find a job... he'll go to some classes where they help him find a job,and at the same time they'll give him cash and foodstamps...

He can also go around the.neighborhood and ask to cut their grass,clean their house,walk their dogs.. anything that will help contribute..

And your daughter is not a baby anymore,she needs to think about her future,and she should've found herself a man that could have taken care of him and herself.. not you take care of them..

And your boyfriend shouldn't use being stressed as an excuse to abuse you! That's not o.k!