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    AND10's Avatar
    AND10 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jul 6, 2012, 09:40 AM
    Thinking of divorce
    Seriously thinking of getting a divorce. I've been married for almost 9 years, we've been together for 15 years. We have 2 young boys together ages 5 and 8. I am not in love with my husband and really haven't been for a long time. He is rude and disrespectful to my mother. He thinks she is too controlling. I do not feel that she is. He thinks she also brainwashes our boys, which I also do not agree with. He puts me in the middle and tells me I need to talk to my mom. I do not like confrontation and do not disagree with my mom so I don't see the need to talk. However, I did talk with my mom and my sister and they both do not like my husband. They think HE is the one controlling and doesn't get along with my mom because HE wants all the control over me. They said I am being emotionally abused. He is unreasonable and will not listen to anyone once he has his mind set. He has gotten away with telling his own parents what to do so he thinks it is okay. I do not love him and do not see things getting any better. I don't know that I even want to try because it seems that when I do, things get bad again in a matter of weeks. I am scared of divorce because I know he loves our boys and he will fight with everything to get them as much as possible. I know we would have joint custody but the thought of not seeing my boys every day is killing me. My 8 year old already has some behavior issues and I am afraid they will only get worse. I don't think our relationship now is doing any good for them so I just don't know what is best... stay and be miserable or get out and miss my boys and risk hurting them?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Jul 6, 2012, 09:59 AM
    Children know things without words being said - they HAVE to know that you don't love their father and the household is tense.

    Me? I'd go for counselling either with him or alone.

    I'd also consult with a divorce Attorney if you are terribly unhappy.

    I would never discuss my husband with my mother and/or sister and/or any other relative - some things are private and I would be very upset to learn he's discussing me with other people.

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