[zappersix]

Im paying child support for my son but I want to know if he has been adopted by his non biological father. My name is not on the birth certificate but I am paying child support. The ex keeps going to child services to change states with higher child support payments.

[joypulv]

Adoption couldn't take place without your knowledge and signature.

[zappersix]

Thank you for the reply... she changed my son's name into her married name because my name was not on the birth certificate and that she did not need my consent. She is also changing the support from Oklahoma to Florida since she would get more from Florida.
The thing the bothers me most is that she does changes while I am deployed so by the time I get back from my 12-15 month deployment, everything is already done.

[ScottGem]

You need to get your facts straight, because what you are saying doesn't jive with the law.

1) A birth certificate is a legal document. It can't be changed without a court order. A court won't issue a name change order without the consent of both parents.
2) She can't just change states. Under the UCCJEA jurisdiction stays with the state that issued the original order unless both parents move from that state. Now your being active duty does complicate things, but under the SCRA, you can have a suit postponed while deployed. If the action was taken while deployed you can ask that it be overturned.

You need to get an attorney who knows the law so this can be straightened out. If you are active duty, you can talk to the judicial arm of your service branch.

[zappersix]

Thank you for the answer... I will check with legal in the army but from my experience, they will not get involved or get into the specifics with regards to these issues. Army lawyers always sent Soldiers with these issues to civilian lawyers which would cost an arm and a leg...
To address your comment, my name was not on the birth certificate of my son, she remarried and applied for a passport for my son and used her new married last name for my son. I think she just wants more money and my support already went up last year because I got promoted and she took it to child services and the garnishments were automatic on my Leave and Earning Statements. All I got was a notification from Child Services that it was going up even though I never received it because I was deployed until the middle of last year. It just came automatic on my LES without my consent.

[ScottGem]

As soon as child support was ordered you became the legal father. So your name on the birth certificate was immaterial. If she obtained a passport for you son using fraudulent information that is a serious crime, I would report it to the State Dept.

As soon as you received the notice, you should have sent the court a letter stating that you are currently deployed and that you were requesting a postponement under the SCRA. The Army lawyers should help you at least with that.

As far as affording a lawyer you can't afford not to have one. By your inaction you have given her the upper hand and its costing you. You may even be able to have her pay your court costs.

[zappersix]

It is so frustrating and this is adding to the already stressed environment that I am going through... I will pay my dues but she just keeps taking me to the bank...
Im worried in pissing her off because she will contact my chain of command and that normally gets me into troublebec she will tell the story over and over again to anyone that would listen..
I was never married to her... I was going through midlife crisis at the time and got involved with her because my wife and I were separated... she got pregnant but she is not the type that anyone would marry because she fools around... I am not claiming to be a victim but I was desperate at the time and needed a friend to confide in... she got pregnant and the rest is where I am now...
Every time she calls my chain of command, she tells them that I was married at the time... and to the army's eyes, even if I am separated, I am still considered married and therefore have committed adultery which could get me dishonorable discharge or UCMJ (non judiscial punishment) after she makes the call, I lose all credibility with my leaders and have to start over in proving myself worthy to stay in the army... it's the shame that the army makes you feel about the adultery part and I go through it just about every time I move to another duty station.
Its frustrating and embarrassing but I do not know what to do...

[AK lawyer]

... 2) She can't just change states. Under the UCCJEA jurisdiction stays with the state that issued the original order unless both parents move from that state. ...

The UCCJEA has to do with custody, not child support.

If OP has been administratively adjudicated the father, and therefore obligated to pay child support, he should be entitled to ask for a birth certificate. If an adoption has taken place (It shouldn't have, but we don't know what she may have told a court in connection with an adoption.), the vital statistics office of the state where the child was born will probably refuse to give him a BC, but that would be evidence of adoption which he could take to the child support agency and demand that his child support witholding cease.

If CS has been administratively ordered without notice to him, and an opportunity to be heard, there will be procedures in place to challenge and reverse it.

[zappersix]

Im in the army and I was stationed in Oklahoma when she got pregnant and where she had the child. Child Services from Oklahoma is the one that garnishes my support my my LES and I am currently stationed in Fort Carson, CO but deployed to Afghanistan through December 2012. I claim Florida as my state of residence and that is where she moved and where my son is located as well.

[zappersix]

By her changing the my son's name into her new married last name is that considered adoption?

[AK lawyer]

By her changing the my son's name into her new married last name is that considered adoption?

No, not necessarily. She could have petitioned the court for a name change, but she would have been required to give you notice of that. Or, it's possible that she is just telling people that her married name is the child's as well.

[zappersix]

She originally notified me that she needed consent to change the child's name and when I told her to send me the details of what I have to do whether there is a certain format or what, she did not reply. She just emailed me yesterday saying she has the passport of my son in her married name and that she did not need my consent because my name was not in the birth certificate.

[ScottGem]

By her changing the my son's name into her new married last name is that considered adoption?

No its not. Adoption is a legal process that requires a court order. Though so does a change of name.

But, if she has changed the child's name you could go to the agency that is collecting support or the FL courts and tell them you believe your child was adopted which frees you from a support obligation. Let them require that she show the child wasn't, which can then get her in trouble for the name change.

Also you can ask that any FL action she initiates be postponed until you deployment is over.

I would make sure your change of command knows the situation. Show them that you are trying to do the right thing, so the next time she calls, they won't listen.

[AK lawyer]

...
I would make sure your change of command knows the situation. Show them that you are trying to do the right thing, so the next time she calls, they won't listen.

Chain of command?

[ScottGem]

Ooops

[zappersix]

ooops

Thank you all! Unfortunately, I did not want my chain of command to know because I did not want them to label me as "trouble maker" or problematic Soldier, so to speak as their first impression of me... I just got to Colorado in September and only had enough time to get my family settled in. I was fortunate enough to spend Thanksgiving and CHristmas with my family. I did not deploy until February and I am on a 9 month deployment. I did not want my new chain of command to know about this as I got to Fort Carson and after inprocessing, I went straight to JRTC (Joint Readiness Training Exercise in preparation for deployment) and returned from training in time for thanks giving and then block leave for Christmas holidays... then deployed in last week of February...
Before going back from this deployment, I will let them know...

[ScottGem]

Good luck and keep us posted.

And thank you for your service.