[fonzuwa]

I need a good opinion from mature and responsible people only if possible... I just moved to Australia 18months ago with my family , as soon as we arrived , all plans changed , my partner decided to take a café with his cousin and in a few words he lost every thing , in a few words he is very lazy, he can't run a busniss at all.Mind you he had an accident and smashed his car and realized that he wasn't insured. . In a few words this man he is so unresponsible that he can't even look after himself .What comes his way he ruins.So now it left me numb and with all the feelings one should have after being treated like a nobody after coming all this way and had lots of money of the house we had sold prior . We are still living in the same house but we don't talk so it's time to move on , after 12 months... I guess.As my contract for the rented house where we live is till November , we are all waiting to go our own way as not even my 2 eldest kids wants to stay with us any more , I don't blame them as my family turned to boring and unhappy situation . Mind you I have a good job and my ex partner don't work . Now this is the hard decistion that I can't decide on . What you think What's best for me to do ,I stay and pay $300 a week for rent and have no choice just to work hard for the next 15 years or to go back to my old small country where I left all my family and friends and I pay no rent as I still have a furnished flat there and I don't have to struggle to make ends meet .Is it possible to live an easy life with an 8 year old and pay all that rent and on a part time job... I feel so bad for my son who is getting used to it here, he is making new friends and I am sure it as hard for him too... I really want to make it easy for him... My other 2 kids are old enough. To look after themselves.. Please help me see what I am not seeing... Thank you

[WisperWill70]

It sounds like your partner's so-called "laziness" might have been the result of his accident as well. Are you sure you're not being quick-deciding and looking to bail on the relationship just because he's gotten hurt or fallen on hard times. Businesses fail. Are you being unreasonable? Him being a deadbeat is one thing, but it sounds like he had reasonable challenges. -- It's up to you and other relationship dynamics -- you have to do what is right for yourself/child.


Speaking of not being lazy-- if you've a "good job" -- why not work hard? Most people do and most people find fulfillment in working for a living and paying rent. You could go home and have things easier... but if this is a place you like and your kids are happy, consider staying.
The place that is best for you might be the place that challenges you to go outside your comfort zone and to embrace new things, learn new skills and learn about yourself as you work hard. Your kids will learn what it's like in the real world. If you don't like your soon-to-be-ex for being "lazy" maybe you won't like yourself for being lazy in the long run.