Check out some similar questions!

Bshreezy · Apr 3, 2012, 06:09 PM

My girlfriend broke up on the last day in January because she didn't feel the same way about me as she did before. We'd been together almost 11 months and been through a lot of stuff together and I have really really strong feelings for her. We met up and talked about it a couple days after and she said she doesn't want to be with me anymore because she's fallen out of love with me and that I was too needy and she just can't be with me anymore. We agreed to be friends but have only texted a couple times since January. I leaving for college at the end of summer but she will still be at home so I think that played a part in her decision also. I really miss her and want to get back with her again and I would be willing to do anything for that too happen. But whenever I do text her or see her at school she barely says anything to me. And there's no other guy in the picture for a fact, I'm good friends with her friends do they let me know what she's up to. I don't know how to start to get her back, she won't even talk to me. Any advice?

Alty · Apr 3, 2012, 07:12 PM

The only advice I have is to move on and get over her.

Read your post. She said "My girlfriend broke up on the last day in Janurary because she didn't feel the same way about me as she did before", and "she said she doesn't want to be with me anymore because she's fallen out of love with me and that I was too needy and she just can't be with me anymore".

She agreed to be friends because we girls have a hard time breaking guys hearts. Throwing you a bone, offering friendship, is a lot better than saying "get lost, I'm not interested anymore, just leave me alone", because we hate being that mean.

The fact is, she doesn't talk to you because she wants nothing more to do with you. The offer of friendship was to make you and her feel better, but it wasn't sincere.

You can't get her back. She's done.

Sorry, I know that's harsh, and it hurts, but the truth often does. It's in your best interest to start getting over her, move on, find someone that loves you as much as you love them.

Bshreezy · Apr 4, 2012, 10:50 AM

I agree with you but there were some details that I left out because I didn't expect an answer from anyone, so thank you for your advice. However, the break up came out of no where. Literally 2 weeks before she dumped me I spent 3 days with her and her family on a ski trip and were doing amazing, we didn't fight at all for like and everything was good, just like the previous 10 months. I didn't see any signs of her losing interest in me at all. Also, that week leading up to her dumping me was really hard on her. She got in a fight with her parents and something happened with her brother and her parents made her quit her favorite sport, all that happened in one week. And then to make the situation worse we got in a fight that Friday and then on Saturday she said we need to take a break and I said that was fine. Then the next day she said she felt like taking a break was just her prolonging breaking up with me so she just ended it on Sunday instead. I thought it would just be a frustration break up because of everything that went on but it's turned out to be for real and it's been two months now

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2012, 10:57 AM

This is what the breaker-upper does. He or she gets it all figured out in his or her own head long before mentioning a "break" or breakup to the partner. That blows the partner out to center field, never having seen it coming.

That's what happened with you. She had it all figured out long before the ski trip which she made nice and fun, but that was the death knell on your relationship. She hadn't clued you in about her future plans, so you were blindsided.

Now, get up and get going back into life. She's gone. It's over. Hold the good memories close to your heart, but she is out of your life now.

Homegirl 50 · Apr 4, 2012, 11:23 AM

She has not contacted you. In her mind you two are done. It is time to move on

Bshreezy · Apr 4, 2012, 07:47 PM

So you don't think there is any chance of us getting back together? I leave for college in 5 months and I'm graduating in June and I would want nothing less but to spend my last time in town with her and the rest of my friends before I leave. I haven't lost any feelings for her and really want to try to get back together with her.

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2012, 08:01 PM

There's no chance.

Fr_Chuck · Apr 4, 2012, 08:14 PM

No Chance,

She was being nice in the break up, with all of that "we will be friends" And sorry to you it may have been going good, but if he was going good, she would not have broken up.

It is common for one side not to see it coming and no this is it, no more closure.

At this point, you try to talk, and still text her ( some call that stalking since they don't know when to stop and when to accept it is over) She has went to NO CONTACT which is what a person does to get it over.

Just accept it and get over it.

talaniman · Apr 5, 2012, 07:49 PM

Sorry guy, No chance.

Alty · Apr 5, 2012, 08:14 PM

I'm sorry. I know it's hard to accept, but this is over. She isn't talking to you because she's done. The relationship is over, she doesn't want to even be friends, maybe because she knows you can't accept just a friendship with her.

As for the relationship before the breakup. No surprise there. Most times the person that's thinking of leaving the relationship doesn't let on that that's how they're feeling. Most times the dumpee has no idea it's coming.

It wasn't one circumstance. It wasn't a fight with her parents, or problems with her brother, or a fight with you. It was the fact that she didn't want the relationship anymore, that's what ended it. If it had just been a fight then she would have called the next day. She didn't, because those weren't the issues. The issue is that she doesn't love you, and has decided that she doesn't want to be with you.

You need to let this go. She's not coming back. I'd bet money on it.

slywestin · Jun 23, 2012, 10:30 PM

All you got to do is this.
Remove all doubt and just
Believe she's coming back.
The power of thought is highly misunderstood.
Thoughts become things so only think about having a second chance.

Alty · Jun 24, 2012, 08:43 PM

And how many years should he wait, sitting and hoping that she'll come back, before he accepts that it's over and it's time to move on?

How does believing that she'll come back, get her back, when she's made it very clear that she doesn't want him back?

"The secret" way of thinking isn't going to help here. There are times in life where thinking positive does nothing but prolong the inevitable.

someboooody · Jun 27, 2012, 05:00 PM

I agree with alty. Thinking positively is just lying to yourself. It isn't going to change the way she thinks. I know this for a fact because my girlfriend just broke up with me on the 8th of June 2012. Her reasons were pretty much the same. She said bunch of excuses like religion and communication issue, but what it really came down to was that she didn't love me any more. I found that out the second time we talked. I know how you feel bro, I'm still in deep depression but slowly I'm realizing that she does not love me any more, and has moved on or at least try to forget me by not contacting me. Just think to yourself a girl is treating you like that doesn't deserve your love. Don't blame yourself for something she had done to you. It is her lost. Even if you guys do end up getting back together do you think you will be happy with her not loving you with all her heart? Don't you think you deserve someone who loves you just as much as you love them?