[rdb777]

Hi, I'm a girl and have a girlfriend, we've been together for almost 3 years.
She says she's in love with someone else, and has been trying to fight it for months.
She says she loves me.
She's very confused and doesn't know what to do, since she has these strong feelings for the other person, but loves me and has a life with me.
Should I walk away or fight for this relationship? I love her so much. But if it's useless I want to know. I'm up for trying to help her forget this person, going to therapy together, working on our problems, everything. But she says she doesn't know what to do. She wants to see this person and be with them, but she doesn't want to lose me.
I cannot have her be with me and another at the same time. I wouldn't stand it.
Should I insist on making this work and staying with her while she tries to get over her feelings?
Or should I give up on being with someone who is in love with somebody else?
She really is everything to me. Please help.

[littlesister83]

I have been in her situation before. Being that she told you she might just have expected you to end it right there, not knowing how deeply you care for her. But, you do and even though I didn't have anyone fight for me I would have welcomed it, I went a year asking myself what I should do. I ended up deciding on my own without any influence to stay. This was very hard not only because I kept it to myself, but because its always exciting to think about being with someone new and how it would be. And she really shouldn't look at it in a lustful way, it only clouds the judgment. I can't really tell you how she should look at it, she needs to sort things out on her own without you trying to get her to forget her feelings. Because what if she doesn't? Then you dragged this out longer then it should have. And being that you tried to make her forget her feelings for someone else she might be upset with you for it.

I'd say fight for her, but in a graceful way. Don't bombard her with gifts, that is you trying to buy her love and that's not fair to either one of you. Reminder her what made you two fall in love in the first place, and tell her of the many great memories that you two have shared, and maybe she will realize that leaving you would be a bad idea.

But there is always the: what if she decides to end it? And the: what if she decides to end it and realizes down the road that she made a mistake? Can you forgive and forget, and take her back? Would you be willing to do that? And if she leaves you leaves you? This might sound corny but if its what makes her happy its going to hurt like hell for you. But I say if you love her and want to be with her for years to come, then fight.

I hope that this helped and I with the best for you!