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rikku3464 · Feb 15, 2012, 07:34 AM

NEED HELP NOW!OK I have a friend n her name is lily, lily is dating a 19 year old and lily is 14, and may be in a sexual relationship with this guy, I'm not to sure. About it yet. But I need to know if they are in that type of relationship what could happen to him. Her mother had said that the cops had stopped by to c because, a friend of lilys, mother had called and made a report of the "kissing" and lily and her boyfriend never did in public. And I really need to know if he can go to jail or prizon. Lily REALLY loves him. He's a really good guy, he has done so much for her, and I trust him to take care of her. Please lily lives in the state of Wisconsin and really needs the help. Plus if he goes to jail so does her parents because they are allowing this. I mean they don't like it but I don't know. Her boyfriend is a really good guy and he would do anything for her. Before when they had to split because of lily bfs parents, lily couldn't get over him, she missed him a lot her friends and I had to drag her out of the house. When her boyfriend and her meet up again aftter awhile they6 got back together and lily parents approved of there relationship. All I need to no is what would heppen if they were engaged into a sexual relaionship. PLEASE HELP ME!

J_9 · Feb 15, 2012, 07:51 AM

If they were having a physical relationship the pedophile could go to prison for statutory rape and be labeled a sex offender for the rest of his life.

rikku3464 · Feb 16, 2012, 08:24 AM

I need help I no that already

vbgirl13 · Feb 18, 2012, 03:47 PM

Not if they are having sex if they are he is going to jail. There are no dating laws that say anything About this if they have sex he is done. And she can't see him anymore go on Google and type it in and ask about it in it might help

Alty · Feb 18, 2012, 03:54 PM

Any sexual relationship with a child is not legal. If they're having sex he will go to jail and be labeled a sex offender for the rest of his life (like J9 stated).

Being a sex offender requires him to register as such, and there will be limitations set on him. Any job he applies for he'll have to notify the potential employer that he's a sex offender, a rapist.

If the parents were okay with them dating that doesn't mean they approved of them having sex. Sex isn't dating. Sex puts this relationship on a very different level. The parents won't go to jail. He will.

He's a pedophile. What adult would be interested in a relationship with a child? They can't possibly have anything in common. They're on two different levels.

Because she "can't live without him" he may even be charged with grooming an impressionable child.

ScottGem · Feb 18, 2012, 04:06 PM

It is a rare 19 yr old who would be romantically interested in a 14 yr old for anything other than sex.

The age of consent in WI is 18, however criminal penalties seem to attach only when the child is under 16. Either way, Lily is underage. And yes, if her parents knowingly allow a sexual relationship they can be prosecuted also.

You say he has done so much for Lily. This leads me to suspect that Lily is not in love, but confusing gratitude for love. Since she is too young to really be sure about love.

And I'd like to know how they met and what he has done for her. Because that could be signs that he is a predator.

If the 19 yr old is really a good guy, then he will be smart and drop this relationship until she's 18.

Alty · Feb 18, 2012, 04:16 PM

Scott, I do agree that if the parents allowed a sexual relationship they could be prosecuted as well.

But from reading the OP's post, the parents were at first against them dating, and then agreed to let them date later. I don't see anything in the OP's post that indicates that the parents were okay with their 14 year old child having a sexual relationship with a 19 year old adult.

But that's just going by what I read, and we all know that what the OP writes isn't always the whole story.

Having said that. If the parents allowed them to date, but were against a sexual relationship, would they still be liable if the 14 year old child and the 19 year old adult decided to have a sexual relationship without the parents consent?

ScottGem · Feb 18, 2012, 04:37 PM

948.02 (3)
FAILURE TO ACT. A person responsible for the welfare of a child who has not attained the age of 16 years is guilty of a Class F felony if that person has knowledge that another person intends to have, is having or has had sexual intercourse or sexual contact with the child, is physically and emotionally capable of taking action which will prevent the intercourse or contact from taking place or being repeated, fails to take that action and the failure to act exposes the child to an unreasonable risk that intercourse or contact may occur between the child and the other person or facilitates the intercourse or contact that does occur between the child and the other person.

The bolded portion is the key here. A reasonable parent would have to assume that a 19 yr old would be after a sexual relationship. Just as we are making that assumption. Therefore their failure to prevent it puts the child at an unreasonable risk.

I'm not saying it's a slam dunk or even that a prosecutor would prosecute such a case. But I believe the law gives that option.

Alty · Feb 18, 2012, 04:52 PM

Thanks for the info. That should be a huge wake up call to any parent that agrees to let their underage child date an adult, even if they don't condone sexual relations.

I guess the adage "just say no" is still the way to go.

Cat1864 · Feb 18, 2012, 05:46 PM

Are you Lily?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/womens...ed-615836.html

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...ke-621470.html

From your previous threads, I think you know very well what would happen to him. Now 'her' parents could be in trouble too. When are 'Lily' and her boyfriend going to stop playing games? When she is pregnant and everyone else is is going through the court system?

Alty · Feb 18, 2012, 05:58 PM

Good catch Cat. Had to spread the rep.

I hope "Lily" is as mature as she seems to think she is, because when her rapist boyfriend goes to jail, and her parents go to jail for allowing her to be raped, she'll be on her own.

But she's very mature I'm sure. After all, she's already had a pregnancy scare. She's having sex. If you're old enough to have sex and be a mom (the two go hand in hand) then you're old enough to take care of yourself, so no big deal, right? :(

rikku3464 · Feb 22, 2012, 07:09 AM

No I'm not and they aren't doing anything like that. Thanks guys for your help I have figured it out, she is fine and so is the guy.thx again

ScottGem · Feb 22, 2012, 08:53 AM

No Lily is NOT fine if she is having sex at 14 especially with a 19 yr old. And even if she's not, she is playing with fire having a relationship with a 19 yr old. And NO the 19 yr old is not fine if he is taking advantage of a 14 yr old. He may be a pedophile and is definitely morally and ethically corrupt.

But there is nothing more we can do about it but warn about these issues. If you choose to ignore them, that's on your head.

Fr_Chuck · Feb 22, 2012, 10:18 AM

Agree, if she is under 18 it is a crime, under 16 it is a Class C felony, and the 19 year old boyfriend will go to prison for about 3 to 5 years. They can not give permission to have sex, no one can. And if her parents give permission they may go to jail also.

The 19 year old will be a sex offender for the rest of his life and have to be registered as such.

So unless a 14 year stops having sex, no she is not "alright"