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MDAB19 · Feb 7, 2012, 11:58 PM

Me and my boyfriend have been together almost 3 years on and off.he's a drug addict and has been to rehab several times.he just got sober a couple months ago,and is now in jail from some things he done when he wasn't sober.he told me that he's never actually cheated,except he's kissed a couple other girls and used to text other girls all the time.he lied to me about EVERYTHING.I'm a very jealous person and if any other guy would have done what he's done,I would've been gone a long time ago.he says he's changed and everything else.I'm 19 years old,and he's 20.I don't know what to do.

MDAB19 · Feb 8, 2012, 10:51 PM

He's never hit me,or even been close.im asking what I should do.. whether I'm wastin myy time or if people can actually change

addicts_mom · Feb 10, 2012, 12:03 PM

Hi MDAB19

Lying, cheating, stealing all comes with the territory of being an Addict. I can tell you from my own personal experience an addict is capable of change, but they need to get sober first.

I was all those things, then I got sober 25+ years ago and still continue going to meetings to keep by sobriety and because I do the right things today I don't have to lie, cheat or steal anymore. My life is pretty much an open book now - there is nothing to hide. I CHANGED.

The key thing about an addict getting sober and staying sober (one day at a time)is that they truly have to want sobriety and are willing to work on their sobriety (with a program - not just staying away from drugs)every day to learn how to live on a daily basis and deal with life without drugs. If they do these things they are capable of changing.

My 19 yo old, who is a drug addict, just got out of jail after almost 1 year (with no drugs). He was unwilling to go to any meetings or any type of program and within a couple of weeks of getting out he's right back where he was.

He's got a long road ahead of him to stay sober continue to change. I guess it depends on how much you feel for him and what you expect from him. If you are expecting all the things that need to change to be fixed tomorrow than you should walk away. If you have patience see how it goes.

loveit99 · Oct 2, 2012, 06:56 AM

My boyfriend is a speedballer. I never knew what that was. In fact last night he got money from his grandmother to get his sticker for his car, well no sticker and came home higher than ever.
He has been through it all the bad childhood, the drugs in the home. But we have a family.
He steals my ATM card while I am sleeping. Now my rent will not be able to be paid. Its hard. After yesterday I do not know if Ii can deal with it anymore. He makes me sick. I don't even want to have sex with him, since he used herion intravenously. He has been tested and is fine, But I just can't bring myself to do it. All he can say is " I f**cked up. Well that's their favorite thing to say. So am I stupid or what. A LYING STEALING DRUG ADDICT! I pretty sure I deserve and can do better. I love him don't get me wrong,but Im confused what to do.