[xxHeartlessxx]

I'm a sophomore (15) and he's a junior (16). We only dated for two weeks, but he was moving too fast emotionally. I broke up with him for his benefit since I could never love him the way he loved me. He was already saying he loved me and that I was the best thing in his life and he was complaining about everything to me - I felt like his mom. Anyway, I did it at school (but still where we were alone). Apparently, he made a scene in the hall and word has gone 'round the school about it. I made the mistake of going to lunch (the only time we ever had together) today and he talked endlessly about suicide and cutting. He's talked about it before, but he hadn't while we were dating and he hadn't gone into so much detail (pills, having friends come to his house to stop him from killing himself). I had to leave. What was really irritating was that it seemed staged - his own best friend insulted him about the cutting and was doing a terrible job of acting. I figured out then that he was just using this to guilt me into getting back together with him, which pissed me off since I'm already ready to move on and he knows that a year ago, I was also in that position of self-harm and suicidal thoughts. I feel like he's taking advantage of my compulsion to help and feel sorry for people so I'll get back together with him. I went to the school counselor about it (from whom I found out that he made a big enough scene the other day to attract the attention of the entire administration - all over a two week relationship!) and I ended up having to give his name over so his counselor could talk to him. Problem solved, right? Wrong.

I'm extremely scared that if he sees me, he'll lash out at me. It should be confidential, but I'm the only person he knows that would refer him to the counselors, so he'll know it was me. I'm also afraid that he'll actually commit suicide since he's attempted over thirty times. And when I was dating him, the marks on his arm were fading away, but now they're new and red and puffy - I feel like it's because of me. I don't know what I should do; I feel like I've already messed things up enough.

[Stix2thaBrix]

Sounds like the boy needs serious counseling! Just try your best to stay away from him.. And he is only beating himself up and leaving marks for the attention. Nothing more. He thinks that is the way to go by scaring you into getting back with him. Trust me, you're not the first girl to deal with it and you won't be the last. My little sis went through the same thing

[awesomagic]

You are very well spoken to be as yound as you are. You seem really mature. I'll try to help.

First of all, anyone who has tried to commit suicide over thirty times doesn't really want to die. He wants you to feel guilty. Don't buy it. You are guilty of nothing more than trying to show care for another human being. DO NOT let him use that against you. I applaude your love of people, and I urge you to never, ever lose that. In today's world that is a rare commodity.

Second, your counselor will not give your name to anyone. That would be unethical. Also, you can't assume that he will automatically know that you are the informant (which, by moral obligation you should be). He's too wrapped up in himself to care anything about you. That may sound harsh, but I would bet on it. So don't lose one second of sleep over that.

Stay away from him. You cannot single-handedly fix him. Lesson #1: people cannot fix people who don't want to be fixed. You cannot bring him up to your level - he will drag you down to his. I guarantee it. Stay out of his life and don't let him into yours. If he threatens to harm himself then don't say a word to him. Just leave. You don't care anymore. His life means more to you than it does to him. That is not the way. In my humble opinion, you should consider moving on... and don't look back. God bless you, sweetheart.