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New Member
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Jan 14, 2012, 07:59 PM
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So I had this friend who is a female as I am, and she had a HEAVY crush on me and
Wanted to date me and I declined to date her, I mean I'm not into women and never have been, plus she has 2 kids. We were friends for 10 months but during that time she did show some signs of being bisexual or gay and I was just ignoring them thinking I was being parinoid since this has happened to me before, she was someone I really cared for and wanted be there for. Well I told her that's not right nor fair for us to be in a relationship and I said we are just friends and that's it. Well, she got very, very upset with me and stopped talking to me for a year, she even told me to TRY HER if I got out of this "friendship". Well I happened to run into her one day and she was acting very very uncomfortable around me and she was ballin up her fists and putting her hands in her pocket, she was with someone that day but she didn't introduce me (which hurt) I'm thinking we were friends but I guess not. Well, I seen her again and she happened to call me so we spoke partially. Well, mothers day 2011 rolls around and, I texted her and she gave me attitude, so I said don't tell me you're still pissed at me after all this time, she replied YOU THINK? And texted me good night. She told me she was a christian but that was all a lie.. Well, she contacted me after a year of anger and biterness and not speaking (its now dec 2011 and she texts me and says hey lets catch up I got movie tickets.. And I said I'm going to decline and then she said oh I just wanted to say hi and so I went a head and broke it down for her I told her we haven't spoken in a year, and all of a sudden you text me saying lets catch up, you've been pissed at me for a little over a year, and I don't feel comfortable around her due to her threatening me as in (TRY ME if you left them) and lyin to her family saying that she don't know why I don't come around etc... But I stated that we can speak on the phone until I felt comfortable starting back to hang out with her. And she replied Sasha, its okay, everything is fine, no harm done. And now she won't speak to me. She never apologized for the way she treated me either. I'm thinking that since she doesn't want to talk nor speak to me, I think she had something planned for me as in to hurt me since she can't have her way, its like everything is all about her and not us. I think she's being unfair and extremely selfish to ruin our friendship over something like this. I didn't tell her too fall in love with me and not knowing how I felt. I'm trying to forget about her and move on but this is harder than I thought id be, I do miss her but its not the same since I don't feel the same way about her. HELP ME THANKS"
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Expert
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Jan 14, 2012, 08:49 PM
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Leave her into the past, and go on with your life.
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New Member
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Jan 14, 2012, 10:11 PM
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I know what it's like to lose a friend over you not feeling the same way, I know it hurts and it probably doesn't let you sleep right but leave it all behind you and try to forgive and forget. If you want to be friends with her again then try going out somewhere public and talk about it, but it's your choice. Good luck.
~ivette~
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New Member
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Feb 9, 2012, 03:24 PM
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Would you be friends with a married woman who had a crush on you?
She told me she liked me in front of people while I was in line, so I let her know that she seemed like a cool person and I don't mind making new friends and I gave her my number and she looked upset and now she gives me an attitude when she sees me. Since she did that I'm thinking she really did LIKE LIKE me and wants more than my friendship, but I don't want to have an affair with her, and ruin both our lives. Hell I'm a female too. What should I do?
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Dating & Teen Expert
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Feb 9, 2012, 04:59 PM
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Maybe you were giving and still are giving mixed signals. I don't understand why you are still so upset or she is for that matter. She is gay you are not. Maybe it is hard for her to continue being friends with you. Have a conversation with her in a non confrontational way. Tell her how you feel and listen to her, or just leave it alone.
There really is no need to post this twice.
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Junior Member
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Feb 9, 2012, 05:25 PM
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Why do you think she has a crush on you? Is it because she said she liked you in front of other people? It could also mean that she likes you as a person. Has she ever given you a reason to think she likes you more than a friend?
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New Member
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Feb 9, 2012, 06:25 PM
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When she said she liked me she was very serious. She'll pick at me and be like Sashahahahaha, or she'll get really close to me but she looks sad. I don't reciprocate. But I don't mind being her friend. What should I do?
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Junior Member
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Feb 9, 2012, 10:14 PM
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She got the wrong idea about you and your relationship with her. That's not your fault. If she wants to be so bisexual then let her be. I once had a friend that was gay and I told him that I would be his friend so long as he didn't ask me to do what he was doing. He respected that, and we were friends until he moved far, far away.
She didn't respect your wishes even when you made them perfectly clear to her. That's not your fault either. Some people are opportunists. Their friendship is strictly conditional, and based on what you can do for them. I suspect that is the case here. If I'm right, then you're better off without her. You cared for her and she tried to take advantage of it. When you wouldn't let her, the friendship was off. She's whining because you didn't give in and now she is retaliating.
The bottom line is, don't feel bad for not being a sucker. You absolutely did the right thing. You should be proud of yourself for sticking to your principles. Well done!
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Junior Member
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Feb 10, 2012, 06:59 AM
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The one thing that you have to remember is that she is a married woman. Being friends with her is one thing but if she has this crush on you it is fairly unhealthy. I would keep my distance from her if I were you. She shouldn't being developing crushes on either sex... especially when she is married. She should be reminded that she is a married woman and her having feelings for someone outside her married relationship can be dangerous and you should remain cautious. If she is not satisied in her marriage that is something her and her husband will have to work out.
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New Member
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Feb 10, 2012, 08:53 AM
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Thanks you are right, no sense in going to back to possibly be physically abused.
Imma live it alone, thanks... it may piss her off somemore if I try and speak to her.
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Dating & Teen Expert
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Feb 10, 2012, 09:10 AM
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Then don't. What is the point of trying to talk to someone who does not want to deal with you. The friendship seems to be over. That's the way things go sometime.
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New Member
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Feb 11, 2012, 11:42 AM
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Well I think that she might have been lead on and started to misinterpret your actions. Personally I think that you should forget and forgive. It DOES sound suspicious that she wanted to 'catch up' while she was blatantly angry at you, and lastly you shouldn't let this affect your love life, it does seem saddening that you lost a dear friend but not everyone is like that! Go out and meet new people, put on a bright attitude and live your life. You only live once so don't waste it :)
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Expert
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Feb 11, 2012, 03:04 PM
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You cannot be friends with this person, so the decision to leave her completely alone is a wise one.
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