[teehee_mefunny]

I am 28 years old, married with 3 kids. I do not get along well with my mother, she is too controlling I think, but then I think all she wants to do is help.. anyway my question is should I let her move in with me and my family?? I really do not know what to do..

[valinors_sorrow]

Even mothers who get along spectacularly with their families pose a significant adjustment for both sides when moving into an adult child's home but with good planning, it can be done. Maybe you would be better served by looking into alternative living arrangements or improving your relationship first. Can you post more about what your motives/reasons are for considering this action... apart from the worry you mentioned, if I may ask? We might be able come up with ways to solve or affect it other than moving her in.

[Fr_Chuck]

I do not on the norm ever advice having other family members living with you unless it is a "have to "

I would not turn her out on the street, and if her health is so bad she needs to live with you so that you can take care of her, then you have to do what you have to do.

I get along great with my Mother in law and she spends about 1/2 the year with us, one month here, one month somewhere else. And I love having her here, but I would not want my mom to step across the door step into my house, and most certainly not live here.

So unless you have a perfect relationship with her, all she will do is cause trouble.

A old idea, if you have to even ask, then you should not

[RubyPitbull]

Teehee, not knowing you or your mother, it is hard for anyone on this site to be able to give you a proper objective opinion. From just the bit you wrote here, you suggest she can be controlling. If this has been an issue between to the two of you, that could spell a disastrous outcome if you move her into your home.

Here are some questions that you need to think about that might help you in your decision.

Does your mother undermine your parenting when you and your kids are together with her?

Does your mother tell you that you are not doing things right, whether it is parenting, cooking, cleaning, general life stuff?

Does your mother get along well with your husband?

Does your mother get along well with your children?

Does your mother pitch in and help with chores when you ask for help, without questioning why, or is she critical of your failure to get these chores done yourself?

Is there any medical reason that she cannot live on her own and requires assistance?

Is the only reason you are thinking of letting her move in with you a financial reason for either you or for her?

Will you have any privacy/she have any privacy if she moves in with you?

Do you have "house rules" and do you feel your mother will abide by them without arguing with you about them?

As I said, think about these questions. See if the pros outweigh the cons, or viceversa. If the pros outweigh the cons, then it is a situation you can live with. If the cons outweigh the pros, then it is a situation you cannot live with.

If you have any questions, concerns, or would like to discussion the questions I have listed here further, then just let me know.

Hope this helped.:)

[JoeCanada76]

I personally would think that would cause a lot of problems and interference with your only family.

See with my experience family inlaw, mother and sister especially cause too much trouble and way too controlling and it almost tore us apart, so I would say it is not a good idea.

Like everybody else said here, we do not know the exact situation so it is hard to say what you need to do, but it should defiantly be discussed with your partner and children. Decided as a family.

Joe