[JohnnyMit]

Hi all,

Recently my girlfriend of almost 2 years wanted a break from me (all of a sudden). During the 1st year everything was perfect, until she went overseas to study and we promised each other that whatever happened that we would stick by each other and tell each other stuff, etc. Well a few months into the relationship we were having hard times with both of our exams, and I guess that I was smothering her and everything during her study period, and not letting her breathe during my exams as well. At first she was all OK, until suddenly out of the blue, she's asking me to move on and says that she doesn't love me anymore.

Well I was shocked at first when she mentioned that as usually went she mentioned a break up previously it was only for an hour, but this time she insisted for over a few days. I begged her to stay and asked her the problem and she said that I was being too controlling and smothering her and she couldn't take it any longer. After a few days of talking, she suddenly out of the blue says that she actually still loves me and tells me not to worry that we are still together, and that I should be happy.

The thing is, it just didn't feel right anymore, I feel that she doesn't treat me as sweetly as she used to and that she keeps asking me to leave her alone when she's out with her friends, and she needs her own time and everything. The thing is I am so used to talking to her all the time that I am so crushed right now. She still says that she loves me and everything but she seems to get really really pissed off and shouts at me if I annoyed her. I tried asking her if she still loves me and all that she can say is yeah, and always says talk to you later. I feel that she;s hiding something, but she says there's no other guys, please help I'm so confused right now. The worst part is that we're are still planning to go on a holiday together, should I even go with her with my condition right now? I'm confused. Please help!

[online.me]

Two possibilities... 1) Might be you are not giving her enough space... do not contact her that much as u usually do. Take a break contact a little less and then see her reactions.

2) As you also believe there might be another guy in her life. In both the scenarios just give a little space. See if she cares enough for you to come back.

[JohnnyMit]

Thanks for the advice, I tried it once and didn't contact her, and she called me and asked why did I ignored her or something and when I gave her more attention that she needs, she'll just down right abuse me. :(

The thing is we still talk every night and it always kills me when I ask her if she loves me and she just says that I am smothering her. What's the point of talking to her then? Im really confused.

[talaniman]

Stop acting like an insecure, needy, child that always needs reassurance. You really need some confidence and not be so afraid of losing her.

That's why you are confused, because you have such great fear that you are a pet, a chore, and that's not attractive or manly. Not to be harsh, but she is tired of you wagging your tail to be petted.

[vanheart]

Read the NC stickies.

"my girlfriend of almost 2 years wanted a break"

If you really & truly, really & truly, love her, then give that gift to her.
Don't wait for a thank you. Or wait around.

"she'll just down right abuse me."
"she just says that I am smothering her"

"Whats the point of talking to her then?"
YES, YES & YES!!

What is the point? I wouldn't.

Go NC, my man.

[JohnnyMit]

I guess I just need to man up and stop relying on her anymore.