Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    xblackxfrostx's Avatar
    xblackxfrostx Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    Nov 7, 2011, 06:29 PM
    How do I forgive him ?
    My father walked out on me and my mother when I was 9, now I'm 12 and he's contacting me through email. I held a very strong anger against him for a while now, but I think it's time to forgive him. But I don't know if I should... or how to forgive him ? Please Help.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
    		  
    #2

    Nov 7, 2011, 06:37 PM
    Let's cut to the chase and talk about your anger. Why are/were you angry?

    How has that anger negatively affected your life?
    xblackxfrostx's Avatar
    xblackxfrostx Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #3

    Nov 7, 2011, 06:43 PM
    Well, I wasn't angry at first I was sad, because I felt like he didn't care because he left. Then I found out that he was with another woman while he was married to my mom. That's when the anger started, I felt as if he didn't care about me or my mother and just lost interest in us and tossed us aside. He did tell me he cared but I simply felt, if he cared he wouldn't have had anything with the other women and he would have stayed. Plus I felt like he was just lying the entire time to me and my mother.

    The Anger has negativily effected me, by I can't even talk to him without feeling angry, plus whenever I here talk of other people's father's. I feel mixed emotions of anger and depression and this has caused major depression issues in my life as well as bad anxiety. In fact I even had a anxiety attack at school at one point.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
    		  
    #4

    Nov 7, 2011, 06:46 PM
    You wanted a real dad who loved you and your mom, someone who would be the head of your family and be someone you could look up to.
    xblackxfrostx's Avatar
    xblackxfrostx Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #5

    Nov 7, 2011, 06:49 PM
    Yes that's exactly right, now I just want to know, if I should or if I can forgive him.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
    		  
    #6

    Nov 7, 2011, 06:50 PM
    What will happen to YOU if you DON'T forgive him?
    xblackxfrostx's Avatar
    xblackxfrostx Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #7

    Nov 7, 2011, 06:55 PM
    I'm worried I'll live the rest of my life without any interaction with my father and that's not what I want. I'm worried if I grow up with never forgiving my father, maybe I won't be able to forgive anyone, I'll live my life with knowing I couldn't forgive the one person I wanted to have involved in my life. I don't want him to die, knowing his daughter, never ONCE, spoke to him after he left. I just want to move on, get this behind me and have a father again.
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
    		  
    #8

    Nov 7, 2011, 07:00 PM
    And what will happen to YOU if you DO forgive him?
Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions
 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

How do I forgive him so we can still be together? [ 4 Answers ]

Well I just found out yesterday that my boyfriend of 5 yrs (he just bought me an engagement ring) cheated on me. It started about 2 1/2 months ago and ended a mth ago. He said it only happened 5 times but the second time was a Friday night when we went out with friends to the pub to celebrate my...

Do I forgive him or not? [ 11 Answers ]

I'm a swimmer and December last year I liked this guy from a different club. We started texting. At the next comp I didn't speak to him, I felt too nervous. I wasn't swimming in the last session but I decided to stay anyway to see if there was something going to happen. My friends, trying to help...

To forgive or not forgive.. [ 20 Answers ]

How can you forgive a cheater?. how can you forgive someone who says they love you and then goes and cheats on you with their ex.. he says he loves me and doesn't know why he did it.. I don't understand.. im so hurt.. I don't know what to do.. wat if he does it again?. I don't think my heart can...

Why can't I forgive her? [ 2 Answers ]

So this a question about my MIL, my husband and I just found out we are expecting our first baby together. We both have daughters from previous marriages, his lasted 1 year mine only three months. His daughter is 12 mine is 8. So this whole baby thing is like brandnew for us all over. But there are...

How do I forgive him? [ 7 Answers ]

My ex-boyfriend told my parents I was gay the night I broke up with him. They had NO clue I was anything but straight. I gave him the excuse that I was gay but really I have had no lesbian experience at all (I am 20). I broke up with him because he has a serious health issue which I now have...

View more questions Search