[djspex]

Hey Everyone

I broke up with my ex April 2006, was a bit messy. I moved abroad to get away from all the painful memories, we were together 3 short years had a house 2 cars a dog and was engaged I only 20 years old and she was same age then.

You see we lost the trust in our relationship and was at each others throats about who was where and why was we late... etc. we were both determined to be friends once we both healed our wounds and now I came back home from abroad that is what we are friends. At first it was a little strange to see her almost every day and not be able to go and cuddle and kiss the usual stuff. I have been having to fight with myself to try and keep my old feelings at bay, it just seemed the more I seen of her the more the wound would open up. What I'm trying to ask is how can I tell if she still loves me, I been searching myself for answers and I sure now that I still love her, but am I being foolish in thinking that we could get back together.

I was completely devistated when we broke up to the point of emotional breakdown, I lost my job, was late on bills, my car got taken off me for not paying I just gave up on everything, then I just used my savings to get away from it all and went abroad to spain for 6 months now I have been back for 5 months I kept strong until now I just need a little guidance just don't ever want to go down that road I went down nearly a year ago. But I feel like I want to try and get back with her but that would be losing face against her if you understand what I mean. Maybe if I tried that I'm afraid that I would lose the friendship that we have now maybe lose her forever.

When I first came back she had a boyfriend wow that hurt at first but I learnt to live with that in fact the guy was OK treated her well, they have broke up now though maybe I getting confused this is why I'm here, well if you can make head and tail out of that I would appreciate it loads for a little guidance

Thanks Everyone Who Replies

[talaniman]

Hi guy, For now forget her and the friendship for now, and work on your own life that you enjoy without her. Fill the void that was created by the break up with new friends and places, and activities, your job, a place to live and leave her alone. Your wounds are still fresh and you have to give yourself time to heal. Trying to be friends when the feelings are still fresh will tear you apart as you will hold out hope of rekindling something that has gone out forever. At this point don't contact her and build a life that makes you happy. Read some of the other posts on this forum to get some good insights in to how to deal with the pain of a break up.

[rol]

<<but I feel like I want to try and get back with her but that would be losing face against her if you understand what I mean. >>

No I don't understand what you mean by that?

You broke up with her didn't you?

[djspex]

No she broke up with me, I heard today that she still has feelings for me (off her dad) it has already been like 10 month since we broke up is that not long enough?

[talaniman]

no she broke up with me, i heard today that she still has feelings for me (off her dad) it has already been like 10 month since we broke up is that not long enough?

Family is not a reliable source of info and I still think you'd do yourself a favor and get over it. Leave her and her family alone.

[rol]

Totally agree with tal.
Let her come and tell you herself that she has feelings.