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tmm77452002 · Sep 29, 2011, 08:35 AM

I have a 7 month old daughter and her father is an idiot. We both have attorneys and are battling over custody.
Can I prove him unfit to have unsupervised visitations based on this:
1) 3 occasions in 30 days took the infant into bars
2) He lives with another couple, their 2 children, his girlfriend of 2 weeks all in a 3 bedroom duplex. He does not even have his own living space. My daughter sleeps in a pack n play that is used by 3 other children during the day for the at home daycare.
3) He took her to daycare in short sleeves and a skirt with no pants under in 50 degree weather instead of buying her a weather appropriate outfit. She is on a very strong antibiotic right now for severe ear infection. This occurrence just happened this morning.
4) He's behind quite a bit on child support. The order has been in place 1 month and he hasn't even paid half.

5) I have proof he has driven her places. He has not had a legal driver's license in at least 6 years.
6) He failed to take her to the dr on another occasion and failed to tell me she needed to see a dr. She ended up spiking a fever of 101.3 and had double ear infection and a cold.

Any input would be helpful

ScottGem · Sep 29, 2011, 11:06 AM

1) Maybe
2) This might prevent overnights, but not unsupervised visits
3) This might call for parenting classes, and education, but, by itself would not preclude unsupervised visits.
4) Has nothing to do with visitation
5) Unless he has a history of accidents, this might get him jailed but doesn't affect visitation
6) See 3

Maybe taken all together this might cause a court to require supervised visits. But one thing the court will look at is that you chose to have a child with this guy.

tmm77452002 · Sep 29, 2011, 01:25 PM

Well, my attorney called before this response and said yes, we are filing a motion with the judge for supervised visitation. And he is sure the judge will sign it. Maybe each one individually doesn't prove much, but all combined in such a short period deems him unfit.
And we don't always CHOOSE who we have a child with. The difference is that I'm grown up now. He didn't. Oh, forgot to mention he's a daily marijuana smoker, I never touch the stuff. He doesn't have real jobs, he works as a bartender 3 nights a week and doesn't claim his tips toward child support.

cdad · Sep 29, 2011, 01:31 PM

Originally Posted by tmm77452002

Well, my attorney called before this response and said yes, we are filing a motion with the judge for supervised visitation. And he is sure the judge will sign it. Maybe each one individually doesn't prove much, but all combined in such a short period of time deems him unfit.
And we dont' always CHOOSE who we have a child with. The difference is that I'm grown up now. He didn't. Oh, forgot to mention he's a daily marijuana smoker, I never touch the stuff. He doesn't have real jobs, he works as a bartender 3 nights a week and doesn't claim his tips toward child support.

Sorry but they say things like that when they can make money from you. Did he also tell you that it may not be granted and in that case he's doing the filing for free?

Your case doesn't sound solid for a slam dunk in court.

tmm77452002 · Sep 29, 2011, 01:40 PM

No, he didn't say any of that. This attorney is allowing me to make payments. I paid the initial filing for custody fee and the serving fee. Oh, and $14 toward his legal fees. He's good friends of my friend's family and since the friend referred me, I think he's taking pity on a single mom dealing with a deadbeat dad. He's never even mentioned there's a charge for filing the supervised visitation petition.

ScottGem · Sep 29, 2011, 01:48 PM

Of course your attorney will be sure the judge will sign it. He may even be right since he may know the judge better than we do. I would also suspect the attorney didn't include the lack of support since that is immaterial to visitation.

We have to answer based on our knowledge of the law. We can't tell you what your local court will do because we don't know the court. I do have to agree with Califdad that I don't see a slam dunk. Your attorney can't be sure the judge will sign. But I hope he's right.

Good luck and keep us posted.

tmm77452002 · Sep 29, 2011, 02:03 PM

Thank you for the input. Its kind of a smaller town I live in, only about 75,000. I'm sure my attorney knows the judge very well. And we happened to get the one judge in this county famous for being rude to parents he feels unfit. He told one dad who wasn't paying his child support that he would be lucky if he were allowed to leave the courtroom with the shirt on his back the next time he came before the judge.
I'm not spiteful, but I am a very good mother. I work very hard for barely more than minimum wage to take care of my kids (I have a 4 year old with another man) I expect a father who wants to be involved to contribute not only his expected child support, but logical and semi intelligent input. A sick infant going into bars and then dressing her in summer clothes in 50 degrees is just stupid. He should have supervised visitation until he takes parenting classes. And he also needs drug/alcohol counseling.