[Michael18]

I broke up with my girlfriend a few months ago. I now know I was silly to be with her because all of the signs pointed to her not really caring. She was being really disrespectful to me and my relatives. After I broke up with her, her and my aunt had an argument so my ex and I don't talk to each other at all because of all the rude things she called my aunt.

When we were together before, she told me that she had been flirting with guys and told one of them that she liked him when she was still with me. She said she was "just like that" and felt compelled to flirt with guys and didn't like the thought of being in a relationship where she couldn't flirt but she did tell me she stopped flirting with him and other guys.

She felt like communication was the only thing that will make a relationship work, she didn't think people need to spend some quality time with their significant other for it to work.

She believed in "chicks before ****s" even if she has spent way more time with them than me.

She's convinced everyone that I was an obsessive, parenting, and controlling boyfriend because I told her I wanted her to: get good grades, quit smoking, not drink, and not to take friends parents cars for a drive at night without her friends parents permission.

Here's a moment of disrespect towards me:

She told me that I was trying to be her parent and going against what her parents taught her because I told her she shouldn't take people's cars without permission. She said she'd prove to me that it wasn't my place to tell her not to take peoples cars so she had me on the phone while she told her mom that she took a drive in the car with her friend. She also told her mom that I was telling her she shouldn't have taken the car with her friend.

Her mom told her about the car:

(The following quotations may not be 100% correct because I don't have direct reference to what they said, but I tried my hardest to remember correctly.)

Mom:"Well, is it bad that you took the car?"

Her: "Yeah."

Mom: "Well then he was right."

Her: "He's on the phone right now, and I wanted to prove to him that he shouldn't tell me what to do."

Mom: "That's really rude of you, and it's not right for you to take cars without other people's permission."

See how she blatantly disrespected me and my feelings?

What she thought about dates and invites:

She also thought that the man should have to provide for the woman 24/7 and that the man should be the only one that takes each other out on dates (and has to pay for the woman every time).

What I think about dates and invites:?

I believe that the person who invites someone out on a date or anything else should usually be the person who pays for whatever they're doing unless the couple acknowledge that they'd be paying for themselves or otherwise, and it shouldn't be based on the gender, it should be based on equality.

Anyway, Back To Recently:

She told me not to tell my mom and dad about her smoking but I had already told them she smoked, so she said she had the right to tell one of my secrets to her friend (when she already had told her all of my secrets before the fact when I never wanted her to).

She told me all secrets are fair game to tell unless the person tells you not to tell another person. So she said it was fair to she told her friend all those secrets because I had never told her not to.

Then I told her from now on we would make sure with each other if we could say something or not.

Then she told me you shouldn't have to tell someone not to say something because they should realize it's a secret not to be told when she had just told me you have to tell someone that you don't want them saying something, making her a hypocrite.

She said on her wall on Facebook prior to this that she shouldn't have to listen to other people who don't follow their own advice which would make those people hypocrites. So when she expected me to listen to what she said and then told me opposite of what she was telling me to do, makes her a double hypocrite in my eyes. You know what I'm saying?

She told me she doesn't see us being together past her graduating from high school and that our relationship isn't even going good right now because we fight all the time. She said to our relationship that she's just "giving it a chance." She told me she never really misses me the way she "really should" so I told her we should take a break if she doesn't feel the same about me because I don't want to wait around and stay with someone who doesn't feel the same. Which would be wasting time staying in a relationship that isn't going anywhere.

I told her I don't want to be with her if she's still with me even though she isn't even feeling it anymore, be it out of pity or just to be with me because she can. She said she does love me, but she didn't want to take a break because it would make her feel bad.

I said the way she had been treating and talking to me had been leading up to us being only friends and breaking up. After that she asked me: "so you admit you thought about it too." So I knew she was already thinking that it hadn't been going well and it was leading up to us breaking up.

Here's the piece of the conversation about wasting time:

Me: "Let's just stop talking about it, we're going to just be friends until you know what you want. Otherwise we'll just be wasting time talking about it the rest of the day."

Her: "Its a waste of time? Or your just to hurt to talk about it. Whatever you do don't blame me your the one making the decision"

Me: "There's nobody to be blamed, I really got to go, I have quality time to spend with my family, bye."

Her: "Asswhole! Now anything I have to say is a waste of time!? Go spend your precious TIME I don't give a **** anymore text me when you can make TIME to discuss anything."

And so:

She put words in my mouth that I blamed her that she was wasting my time when she doesn't even know what she wants from our relationship other than us just staying together to give it a "chance."

Then:

Her friend made fun of her (my ex's friends ex bf) ex bf's manhood on how long he took to get off and other disrespectful things on her wall for all of the public to see on Facebook. My ex girlfriends friends ex, is the guy my ex girlfriend had told me she had been flirting with while we were together a while ago, before she told me she stopped flirting with him and other guys while with me.

So I stupidly got involved bringing myself down to their level by arguing with my ex's friend and my ex's friends ex boyfriend. I defended him by ripping my ex's friend a new one by telling her to basically "shut the **** up" that she was being an "impatient, immature, disrespectful *****" and to stop talking **** about her ex boyfriend, and I also told him to stop egging her on.

And so my ex's friend told me to "**** off" and said it was "none of my business" so I told her she was being a hypocrite because "if it wasn't anybody else's business then she shouldn't have left it open for everyone else to see."

I know I shouldn't have gotten involved because it really wasn't any of my business. The only reason I argued with my ex's friend was because of how mean and disrespectful she was being to her ex boyfriend in a public setting.

So my ex girlfriend got pissed at me for arguing with her friend thinking that I argued with her because I broke up with my ex.

And so this is what my ex said to me after she read my argument with her friend:

"Ok MY NAME why the hell did you attack her you broke up with ME not the other way around so don't ever talk that way to my friends again Seriously MY NAME you are the one that did this to yourself I didn't want to break up but you preasured it. So all that I love us were lies huh? You never loved me. And if you don't text back then your a ****ing hypocrite and can't even grow up. Stop acting 10 and respond. For heavens sake your 19 grow some balls. Also. Since you need to know. You ARE a hypocrite telling her she only did it to feel better and to pubicaly embarres him is exactly what you did to her What happened to ''rather be friends then fight and not even be able to be friends?'' your a ****ing coward. Only reason why your attaking her and not me. Haha do what you told stand your ground don't let me push you. Or would you rather go running with your tail in between your legs. Waiting ill have the phone all night I know you got my messages "

I didn't give in to messaging her back to give her piece of mind because I was done with her: disrespecting me, treating my feelings/secrets like dirt and being hypocritical. I decided not to deal with her double standards anymore. She told me she only cared about and loved me when she felt like it.

[JoeCanada76]

Honestly you BOTH are immature and should not be in relationships until you both MATURE a lot more.

All the back and forth. All the I am telling my parents that you do this. On and on and on. You were CONTROLLING as well.

I think that what does it really matter what happened? Why should it matter so much? You are both separated, thank god you both were not a treat to each other.

Also you felt the need, and she felt the need to include your parents in everything. In all your disagreements. That is a sign of real immaturity.

In other words your both still young, you both should not be in relationships. You both are lucky your apart now.

Everything else does not matter. The only thing you need to do if you can is learn that you had a part in this mess and neither one wants to take the blame but it was both your faults because of both of your behaviors while together.

Now you need to learn from this, mature a lot more and let all of this nonsense go. You can not change anybody. You can not tell anybody what to do. That when you love somebody you love somebody for who they are and you except them for who they are.

If you want a mature relationship you never get your parents involved, ever. You learn how to be independent and deal with things like an adult and work through things with each other as a couple instead of getting others involved.

Hope this is loud and clear enough for you to understand?

[Michael18]

Thank you, I understand.