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    jkiddocho's Avatar
    jkiddocho Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jun 11, 2011, 08:27 AM
    How do I deal with/respond to an ex opening contact again?
    Quick background: My ex and I dated for about 3 years ago and broke up with me 2 months ago and almost immediately started seeing someone else. I tried the whole get back together thing at first but realized it was worthless and gave her space.

    Then randomly a few weeks ago I noticed I had been removed from all social networks she was on. I emailed and asked why and she responded with stating she didn't like seeing me single and told me she didn't want to talk to me.

    Yesterday, I get an IM her after no communication just making small talk. It was the first conversation we have had since the breakup that didn't involve discussing our relationship and was nice. We kind of just caught up, but now I find myself grabbing onto hope again and I'm pretty sure she is still dating this guy. The conversation ended with me tell her I was busy and had to go, no fighting and nothing negative.

    My question is why would she contact me after telling me she didn't want to talk to me and what should I take this contact as? Should I contact her again or just wait until she does again?
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
    Uber Member
     
    #2

    Jun 11, 2011, 08:54 AM

    She's letting you know she has the upper hand-so-ignore her,block her,delete her and stick to no contact.

    ''She immediately started seeing somebody else''-remember?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #3

    Jun 11, 2011, 02:35 PM

    IGNORE HER!!

    Maybe she is just bored, curious, needs an emotional tampon, wants to keep you close if things don't work out with the one she dumped you for, thinks she may have to dump this dude, and wants to get you back, or needs attention, or thinks you are dumb enough to listen to her crap so she makes friends so you will give her some attention again, because this guy she may have cheated with wasn't as good as she thought, OR she knows you still want her back and she wants you to chase her, or its his turn to get cheated on with YOU.

    None of these, or any reasons she has makes one bit of difference. She dumped you for another guy, and that means ignore her. Forever, no friends, NO CONTACT.

    Anything less than full NO Contact would be rather... DUMB, and that's as nice as I could express it.
    superstar18's Avatar
    superstar18 Posts: 380, Reputation: 5
    Full Member
     
    #4

    Jun 11, 2011, 10:00 PM
    I wouldn't contact her if I were you. She broke up with you for another guy after a 3 yr relationship with you. She isn't worth it and will probably only hurt you. Just saying from past experience. I've been in this situation 3 times with the same guy, it is not fun at all.
    Vakantie's Avatar
    Vakantie Posts: 70, Reputation: 10
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Jun 12, 2011, 05:50 AM
    Don't get your hopes up! Do exactly what talaniman says!
    She left you for someone else and probably the only times she contacts you it's because she misses you or is feeling sad/lonely. Don't help her in these situations, she left you! Stay strong, don't get your hopes up and go no contact!

    Do NOT go no contact with the mindset to get her back (mind games), no contact is to heal yourself and to get over her.

    Goodluck and please give us some updates! :)

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