Mean

BelieveInLove78 · May 10, 2011, 03:29 PM

There's this girl in my class who is jelous of me, and likes this boy in my class. But the boy likes me. So, she says stuff like, you can't wear that shirt, it's againsat the law, and when I sing in front of the class she says I shouldn't grow up to be a singer, and that I'm a bad person and so on. And she has a boyfriend! What should I do?

Wondergirl · May 10, 2011, 03:33 PM

Ignore her.

SweetDee · May 11, 2011, 04:30 AM

I don't believe in ignoring bullying. It just makes you her doormat. She won't stop especially if she's jelous of you.

I think you need to decided to defend yourself. You may not like the confrontation but you can't just let her keep stepping all over you. It's diminishing yourself esteem.

If you can bring yourself to say "I'll sing when ever I choose...and LOUDER when you're around" or "Who made you a judge of what kind of person I am, stfu".. "I'm so hot I MAKE this shirt look illegal"... If that's not you... then just laugh and roll your eyes when she comments. In the worst case say "lol, ***???" and laugh. Just keep laughing at her comments. She doesn't need to know that you feel bullied.

If that isn't you... then continue to ignore. If she feels scary to you then perhaps ask your parents to speak with the VP or the P.

I don't know your personality or how confrontational you can be... I just thought that I'd give you some options.

My daughter who's just out of high school now was bullied in grade 8. I taught her that bullies are just insecure kids who probably get bullied at home by their parents. The first thing I ask her to determine was whether this girl is into fighting or just a passive big mouth. If she's a fighter then I would take over by speaking to the VP... and settling this issue. A "mouth piece" is easy enough to handle. She just needs to see that you aren't affected by her. This is why I say smile at her comments or even laugh. If she's pushy and asks you if you think what she said is funny just look her straight IN THE EYE, smile and walk away, if you don't want to talk.

You have to grow a back bone and stand up for yourself. Life is full of people who think they can treat you a certain way. It's up to you to teach them how to treat you.

Just my opinion.

My daughter has always stood up for herself and gained a lot of respect from others, which in turn helped her to respect herself when she was at her lowest, stuck in high school and feeling very alone.

Jake2008 · May 12, 2011, 05:13 AM

Have you ever heard the expression "sticks and stones can break my bones but names will never hurt me"?

I think this is one of those situations where if you were simply to ignore her, she'd be looking like a fool on her own.

Don't feed into it by confronting her, or or ridiculing her, or talking about her- that just fuels the fire.

While it may be easier to claim to be a victim, and get your parents and school officials involved, my advice is to be a little more mature about this, and realize that you are allowing her insecurities to affect you. You do not need to do that.

Realize it for what it is. Ignore it, ignore comments about her, comments coming from her, and stop trying to figure it out.

Turn around and walk away from all of it.

adviceishere · May 12, 2011, 05:39 AM

Absolutely agree with wondegirl and jake, although ignoring her may seem like your letting her get away with it, your really not, she is clearly jealous of you and that's exactly how your winning the situation.

Ask yourself this, isn't it sad that she has to try her best to get you down in front of others in order to feel good about herself? I mean, its laughable and chances are the people witnessing this can see it too!

You just sit back, ignore it and feel flattered that someone can get so annoyed by you just being your wonderful self. That will really get a bee in her bonet :)

SweetDee · May 13, 2011, 05:12 AM

When was the last time you were in high school? Bullying has changed... walking away is mistaken for weakness now and just escalates the situation, sadly.

BelieveInLove78 · May 14, 2011, 07:03 AM

I'm not in high school I'm in fourth grade

SweetDee · May 15, 2011, 04:00 AM

WOW did I read this differently... lol. I thought you were in high school. Now I might go along with the other members in this thread.

I can also see how sad it is how you girls pay so much attention to boys... and even CARE about who they like more. I mean it's girls world now... if only girls would see that. What ever happened to "girls rule, boys drool"??

Be a 4th grader and focus on what you do well and enjoy. Don't let any dumb jelous girl try and rob you of the fun you could and SHOULD be having in elementary school. To hell with that loser! She's pathetic really, showing jelousy is just a sign of weakness and a TOTAL compliment to you.

Keep being shiney and new... :) lol

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